Comments on: Guest Blogger Michael weighs in on orthodoxy

By: esther

esther — Tue, 05 Jul 2005 03:19:04 +0000

A Laya-Jew? An Ephemeral Jewish heretic? Converts? I’m lost. Maybe I should found my own shul too: it shall be called ITSFTS: I’m Too Sexy For This Shul, and it will be led by Rabbi Right Said Fred.

The “witty repartee” between Michael and CK is neither “witty” nor “repartee.” In fact, they’re this close to engaging in a “yo mama” style character slam which will resume if and when CK and Muffti return from East LA. Discuss.

Milat hayom hee: slutface.

By: client

client — Tue, 05 Jul 2005 00:42:47 +0000

ck! I am not part of your team so save your ruse for michael and the gang.

kidding ck. I need no roses from you either.

By: michael

michael — Mon, 04 Jul 2005 23:57:48 +0000

Dude. If you had killed me at Masada, Roni would have avenged my death with ninja skill.

But thanks for making me part of the team anyway. Sharmuta.

By: ck

ck — Mon, 04 Jul 2005 23:45:53 +0000

Uh… slutface? Yup. You got me there. Zinger!

client: step back and mind your own friggin business bitch, this is between me and the little shit stain, ok?

kidding client. Michael is indeed a shit stain, but you’re free to weigh in any time you like. To answer your question, no. The witty repartee between Michael and I is merely a ruse. I actually like him lots. Otherwise he wouldn’t be here. Literally… there was a moment on Massada when I could have easily knocked him over, no one woulda known, but I didn’t do it. So there.

By: client

client — Mon, 04 Jul 2005 22:49:54 +0000

ck, Is this your expression of your love/hate relationship with Jews?

By: michael

michael — Mon, 04 Jul 2005 22:41:52 +0000

Speaking of being served, WHERE ARE MY FUCKING PICTURES, SLUTFACE?

Oh yeah, and Ayelet keeps calling me and complaining that you don’t respond to her e-mails. So make my life easier and respond.

By: ck

ck — Mon, 04 Jul 2005 22:39:22 +0000

You and your Mom should be thankful that you are no longer under my care Michael Fucknor.

You been served beeyatch.

By: michael

michael — Mon, 04 Jul 2005 22:36:45 +0000

Such lively and spirited religious debate! This is why I love the Jewish people! Except for David Abutthead.

Oh yeah. I went there. I brought it.

By: ck

ck — Mon, 04 Jul 2005 22:31:46 +0000

WHAT? Michael you little bitch! I make you a blogger and this is what I get? I started ephemeral Jewry! Laya is the heretic. I guess you are too. That’s it. I reject your converts. So there.

By: laya

laya — Mon, 04 Jul 2005 22:10:11 +0000

yeah, those guys are nuts.

By: michael

michael — Mon, 04 Jul 2005 22:03:14 +0000

I feel your refusal to consider Burger Ranch (or “Burger Rantz,” as I always wind up reading it) as exclusive.

Also, I will use this opportunity to declare Laya-Jewish jihad upon the heretics at ck’s Temple of Ephemeral Jews.

By: laya

laya — Mon, 04 Jul 2005 21:59:37 +0000

ck, you reactionary!

By: laya

laya — Mon, 04 Jul 2005 21:59:03 +0000

hmmm, these are interesting questions you raise, Michael. The Laya Committee on Rules and Customs rules that Shiksa girlfriends are allowed on an individual basis by the standard of cuteness. We have to keep the Laya jews a good looking people after all. This is for Klal Yisrael, mind you. But your suggestion of Burger King has been overruled and replaced with Burgers Bar, for Zionistic reasons.

By: ck

ck — Mon, 04 Jul 2005 21:55:11 +0000

Hey! isn't this why we started the temple of the ephemeral jews? Is a Laya-Jew like a reformed ephemeral jew? if so then I do not accept your existence. Go away!

By: michael

michael — Mon, 04 Jul 2005 21:52:28 +0000

Is my shiksa girlfriend permitted under Laya-Judaism? If it helps, she promises not to eat pork on Yom Kippur, which by the way I think should have its fast replaced with Burger King.

By: laya

laya — Mon, 04 Jul 2005 21:48:28 +0000

now, generally, I’d say only Laya can be a laya-jew, cause its more convenient that way, but then again, I don’t want to be exclusive, so, although some sense of a Deity is preferred, Muffti can indeed join. Now, how do you feel about Shabbat on Tuesdays?

By: grandmuffti

grandmuffti — Mon, 04 Jul 2005 21:36:52 +0000

Laya, can Muffti be a Laya-jew? Do you accept atheists? Muffti will be glad to criticize everyone with you for our lack of acceptance.

By: themiddle

themiddle — Mon, 04 Jul 2005 08:19:36 +0000

Tsk, tsk, rather than walk away politely and say, “We disagree,” you can’t help yourself and include the crap about “grossly misunderstanding” Orthodoxy.

Au contraire, ma petite Laya, I understand. In fact, I may have been exposed to that world for longer than you. But no worries, as I keep repeating this is not about you and it is not about me. And since you’ve already agreed previously to my suggestion about getting a prenuptial “get” agreement before you wed, I know you’ll be just fine. Even if you don’t count at a minyan.

Anyway, hope to see you in other discussions.

By: laya

laya — Mon, 04 Jul 2005 07:01:26 +0000

Yes TM, you can indeed choose to remain unaffiliated and thus clam there is no hypocrisy. Its very convenient. And you can pick and choose the things that work for TM, that’s convenient and unchallenging as well. Maybe I’ll start practicing “laya Judaism” and make it up as i go, and just point out all the flaws in everyone else’s movements. It might be fun for a while.

You’re a Jew, and not better or worse than any one on the basis of your affiliation or non affiliation. I think you grossly misunderstand orthodoxy and halacha, which you really can’t be blamed for. It’s hard to really understand a game you don’t play.

But on this issue, I feel I have pretty much said what I need to say, what you have understood or refused to understand is up to you, but don’t have the koach to keep repeating it. So I for one will be moving on. But thank you for playing.

By: Netsach Shebe Netsach

Netsach Shebe Netsach — Mon, 04 Jul 2005 03:29:11 +0000

cute….
Whats going with CK and Muffti?
Anything worthy of note?