Scarlett Johansson’s Near Accident
Written by ck
An LA billboard promoting Johansson’s latest movie, The Island contained a photo of her cleavage that had been so digitally “enhanced” that when she drove past it she nearly got into an accident. She said:
I was driving through Los Angeles and I look up and see the biggest photo of me I have ever seen in my life on a massive ad space. I screamed and slammed on the brakes, I couldn’t believe it It’s very strange to see my cleavage the size of a brontosaurus. My breasts were huge …
Yup.
What? You didn’t really think I was just going to let this story slide, did you?
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I guess even the common stereotype of the women of our tribe being buxom and curvy like the Pacific coast highway (not that it’s necessarily an untrue stereotype) just wasn’t enough for Hollywood. They had to go try to improve on God’s handiwork.
By the way, ck, you should get rid of the NeoCounter. It’s making things run…mamash slow.
heh…good old hollywood and boobs. It reminds Muffti of that Roger Waters song:
Wait, if lipstick is meant to improve on God’s creation…then it is kefirah! Ban lipstick! Ban makeup! Tell Jewish Mother that she is no longer allowed to encourage girls to gob on black eyeliner lest she face hinek and/or sreifa from our newly formed Sanhedrin!
I saw this story and wasn’t sure what to do with it. Besides, who ever knew that brontosauruses had huge racks? They never covered that in college geology…makes me look at all of those paleontologists differently…
And what about the story about Scarlett’s character almost having been named Esther? Weird, wild stuff.
Oh, Jewish boobs…yeah.
Sky.com has done an entire retrospective of Scarlett’s boobage. It’s funny and well worth a look. Just please, if you’re driving, wait till you get home before clicking on the link.
whoevers the person who posted that link on scarlett’s assets – thank you so friggin much,
So Nu???
Where are the hooters????
Wait, what? Scarlett Johansson is Jewish?
Sweet.
Yup. Her Mom is Jewish. So is Hilly Kristal, owner of CBGB. Just sayin …
What, no photo of the billboard?!
[...] at big?” You are so stunned that you are almost get into accident! Well that is what almost happened to the Scarlett Johansson! I was driving through Los Angeles and I look up and [...]
I read that she is actually quite proud of her “assets” and takes every opportunity to flaunt them.
She acknowledges that they are a big help professionally and even gave them names.
This was in a recent issue of one of those trashy tabloids but I’m too lazy to find which one.
Didn’t know she was jewish…I’m converting.
wow we Jews are getting better and better looking.
wow we Jews are getting better and better looking.
I’m gonna be sick. She can’t be a jew! yak.
how else do you think she would have had so much attention from Woody Allen?
Some people don’t need it…
she’s half danish and only half jewish. her father is danish ..that’s where the good looks come from..scandanavians are a good looking bunch
there is no such thing as half a jew
goldie hawn
Kate Hudson
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me
[...] of me that big?” You are so stunned that you are almost get into accident! Well that is what almost happened to the Scarlett Johansson! I was driving through Los Angeles and I look up and see the biggest [...]