Your guess is as good as mine.

Ok, not such a catchy title, but nonetheless apt. Peres, long, long, LONG time member of the labour party (61 years, 46 of those spent as an MK) resigned his post at age 82. The apparent cause? Disgust with party politics and a strong desire to back political rival and personal friend the fat manSharon and his newly formed party, Kadima. Peres said:

I found myself faced with a contradiction between the party of which I am a member and the realities of the political situation…Without ignoring the deep connection that I have to the party’s historical path and its members, I must prefer the more urgent and greater consideration.

Interpretation: I (Peres) am angry with labour and in no small part because I lost the party leardership to Amir Peretz (they sound the same but are different names!)

Peres then joined with Sharon, claiming:

In the current political structure, advancing the peace process is possible only through a coalition for peace and development and in my view the man best suited to lead such a coalition, based on proven results, is Prime Minister Ariel Sharon…I spoke with Mr. Sharon and I am convinced that he is determined, as I am, to continue with the peace process and restart it immediately after the elections. He is open to creative ideas for achieving peace and security. I decided therefore to support his election and cooperate with him to realize these goals.

This is a serious coup for Sharon who (rather ungraciously to Muffti’s mind) claimed:

Peres has joined us, not the other way around, and he has to accept our platform.

Interetation: We ain’t no labour lefties. We’re tough and firm and even labour’s main man is disgusted to the point that he rather join Kadima than stick it out under some morrocan guy.

Likud, still recovering from Sharon’s departure, went on the offensive even mentioning the ‘O’ word:

I have no doubt that Likud voters will prefer the nationalist, security path of Likud over a list that includes Peres and former ministers Haim Ramon and Dalia Itzik, who were among the leaders of the Oslo process and the path back to 1967 borders.

Those words, spoken by Mofaz, capped the sentiments of likud towards Kadima and their ol’ Boss.

Labour had some sharp words as well:

Labor is the peace party, and Peres saying he left Labor for peace is pathetic…It’s unfortunate that, after Peres did so much for the state, he will be remembered for abandoning his political home for a party of careerists and people with personal interests.

Tough words, MK Paz-Pines! Offensive as a hint o’nip on Jewlicious!

Not to be left out, Meretz chimed in with the following:

Peres was right to leave the ideological supermarket of Labor, but he made a grave mistake when he joined the new supermarket of Sharon, who is selling only goods whose expiration date has passed.

Never let it be said that Yossi Beilin can’t extend a metaphor.

Muffti is pretty excited. With the dissolution of PM Martin’s governement in Canada, he has two dirty, mudsligny elections to look forward to (though both will get little coverage in the US press where he lives. Thanks a lot, ZOG media manipulators!)

How does Kadima look? Comprehensive polls taken last week suggest that they looking pretty good. Kadima (according to one poll Muffti saw) stands to win some 33 seats, while Labour takes about 26. The big losers? Likud. Of course, there is much time left to go but the ball seems to be in the fat man’s court, just where he likes it.

Thanks to Jpost.com and CNN for quotables. Sorry about the graphic. When it comes to graphics. Muffti is no CK.

Gooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooal!

Yeah, yeah, you may have heard about this party elsewhere but THIS announcement is both up to date and a little more fun. Why fun? Because we’re going to give away a pair of tickets to this awesome event to a lucky winner!! Yaaaay! Now laya says that we should have a Hanukkah Haiku contest and I say we need to make it easy. So we’ll do both – either send us your best original Hanukkah Haiku or limmerick or just send me a really good reason why you should win and you and a friend can go to this party FOR FREE!

Now let me tell you about the party … It’s the 1st Annual Jewcy Chanukah Benefit at Crobar. Entertainers include Triumph the Insult Comic Dog, Saturday Night Live star Rachel Dratch, Hip hop provocateur Princess Superstar, Celebrated female rappers Northern State, The Cast of The 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee, The Daily Show’s Eric Drysdale, Actress/comedian Jackie Hoffman, Comic genius Judy Gold, Funnyman Todd Barry, Comedian Rebecca Drysdale and many more of today’s most celebrated Jewish artists … including Perry Farrell (aka DJ Peretz) who will DJ between acts and perform on stage. Wow.

This extravaganza, a benefit for Natan will take place on Sunday, December 11 at 8 pm at Crobar, 530 W. 28th St., New York, NY. Now even if you don’t win, you should still go. It’s for a good Jewhipster-friendly cause and ticket prices start at only $25 and are available for purchase online by clicking here. If you are counting on winning, better get a move on … we announce the winner December 6th. Send all contest submissions to jewlicious@gmail.com.

… and Tel Aviv
Matisyahu, the Hassidic Reggae Superstar will be playing 4 shows in Israel, 2 in Tel Aviv (Dec. 6-7) and 2 in Jerusalem (Dec. 8 and 10). Click here for details and ticket ordering info. Should be fun. Unless it becomes the shana aleph event of the season. And then I’ll probably have to kill someone. Or get stoned. But I am pretty certain Matisyahu wouldn’t approve of either option.

*sigh*

Well, check out this neat clip of Matisyahu live. If you can’t be in Jerusalem or Tel Aviv, don’t worry – he tours like a man possessed and is sure to be in your neck of the woods shortly.

We know that there is discrimination in this world. But this story…this is a story that will shock us all.

As we read, we will learn about how deep into the sea of discrimination men can dive, as they fish around for justification, just for the halibut, only to realize that it’s all a bunch of carp.

Yes, there’s a “Fish War” on in Israel, as gefilte fish importers cry foul at local producers not being subjected to gefilte fish standards as strict as is required for locally produced fish, Ynet reports.

Gefilte fish is a traditional Jewish dish of poached stuffed fish that can be served either warm or cold. As it turns out, gefilte fish is subjected to specific regulations. According to the relevant standard (number 841for those who care) for preserving fish, applicable to carp preserved in gefilte fish sauce, each piece is supposed to be made of carp alone.

But importers claim that in reality, the standard is not being applied to local producers and is only being enforced against them. “It turns out that the stuffed fish pieces suffer from serious discrimination in Israel,” a statement by the importers said.

Gideon Regev, who heads the food department in the Chamber of Commerce, said “the Israeli gefilte fish is made of mixture of fish, but local producers are not subject to any enforcement mechanism.” Regev says the Standards Institute does not allow fish ball importers to refer to the product as gefilte fish unless it’s made of carp only. “There is no justification for this or a traditional reason stemming from unique recipes,” he said. “The product meets all regulations and is imported with a Health Ministry permit. There is no reason not to call the product by its real name.”

The Israel Standards Institute, meanwhile, said the Health Ministry was in charge of the matter.

In summary, everyone’s blaming each other, and who suffers? The poor little fishies. What would Jesus do? Did he say, I’m all up for a miracle regarding fishes, but not you, fish balls? Did Dr. Seuss write a book called “One Fish, Two Fish, Not Fish, You Fish?”

So let’s all band together, as a nation, and carpe eat’em, displaying our openness to being omnipiscean as we welcome gefilte fish, in all its forms, to Ashkenazi kiddush tables everywhere.

(And for those of you who are completely and utterly opposed to gefilte fish in general for Sephardic heritage or other reasons, at least support the fishes’ right to equal treatment. As for the gelatinous substance they’re bottled in that has a longer shelf life than that of a case of Twinkies? No worries…you can discriminate against that stuff all you like.)

The last week has seen the complete redrawing of the Israeli political map. Amir Peretz, a Moroccan Jew, beat Shimon Peres to gain the chairmanship of the Labor Party. Peretz then pulled his party from the ruling coalition forcing an election. Ariel Sharon then stole Peretz’s thunder by quitting Likud and forming his own centrist Party, Kadimah, taking over a dozen Likud MKs with him. Some called it a mistake, but the polls show Sharon is currently in the lead with Likud relegated to a mere 12 seats. Peretz for his part followed up with what looks like an attempt to completely eviscerate the Labor party. After promising his rival for the chairmanship Shimon Peres the number 2 spot on the Labor list, he renegged and instead offered him the symbolic 120th spot, thus ending Peres’s Knesset tenure that stretched back to 1959. Peretz has also effectively pushed Peres into the waiting arms of Sharon who has promised Peres a return to his cabinet post of vice premier with additional responsibility over negotiations with the Palestinians and the peace process. Peres has yet to make any final decisions, but really, what would you do?

Peres’s choices may be further narrowed in light of recent comments made by his brother Gigi Peres who, over the weekend stated that “Moroccan-born Labor Chairman Amir Peretz was a “foreign body” in Labor, who along with his people “from North Africa” had taken over the party the way dictator Generalissimo Francisco Franco had taken over Spain in the 1930s.” Now, I’ll admit that Peretz is a little brusque and his presence is a tad shocking to the otherwise patrician leadership of the Labor party, but likening him to a fascist is just, you know, undignified. But as much as I enjoy watching Peretz rampage through the Labor party like Rodney Dangerfield in a tony country club, I can’t help thinking he’s making a bad mistake. Whatever… whether run by snobby ashkenazim or Marxist-leaning Moroccans, I never liked Labor anyway. What I do like is an exciting race where the final outcome is not a foregone conclusion (Hello USA! Hello Canada!).

Peretz is not a force to be taken lightly, Sharon’s lead might evaporate in the months leading to the elections and Likud… well, I’m pretty sure Likud’s screwed. But whatever happens, I know I’ll be entertained, and really? When the future of a small nation is at stake, what’s more important than a little entertainment?

Very simply, the European nations do not seem to get it. Until they do, they cannot be trusted to have a say in the Israeli-Arab conflict, regardless of how hard they try to insert themselves.

Oh, and if you’re wondering how things like this happen, take a look at just one small facet of the onslaught of propaganda from the Arab and Muslim side that has washed over our world. This is the lie that denies any Jewish connection to the Temple Mount. The article covers a recent book by historian Dr. Yitzhak Reiter, who has just published “From Jerusalem to Mecca and Back – the Muslim Rallying Around Jerusalem.” It is the sordid story of denying the collective history and memory of the Jewish people in order to achieve modern political gains.

At least the Europeans, we now know, have been listening and learning.

Boy, Some Central Asian countries just can’t take a joke.

Kazakhstan’s Foreign Ministry has it’s panties all up in ruffle and is threatening to sue comedian Sacha Baron Cohen aka Ali G over the character of Borat Sagdiyev, of Throw the Jew Down the Well” fame, saying that he ridicules Kazakhstan’s people.

In a brilliant play, Borat responds:

I like to state I have no connection with Mr Cohen.

I support my government’s decision to sue this Jew.

Since the 2003, Kazakhstan is as civilized as any country in the world. Women can now travel on inside of bus. Homosexuals have no longer to wear blue hats. And age of consent has been raised to eight years old.

See the video on Borat’s Website here.

In an added twist, CNN’s reporting of this story proves once and for all that CNN and Reuters are not in fact, run by Jews, to wit – “Responding in character as Borat, Cohen, who is Jewish, said …” Cohen? Jewish? You don’t say …

As you may be aware, Madonna’s latest album, Confessions on a Dance Floor came out last week, and on the strength of a massive media blitz and radio/TV saturation of the first single, “Hung Up,” it sold 4 million copies, proving once and for all that a 40-something woman with frighteningly muscled thighs, ever-more prominent cheekbones, and a completely unremarkable voice can take over the world via bland dance music.

But Madonna’s meaty thighs and her legions of slavish devotees aren’t the real story here. The single-ready song “Isaac,” which had already attracted attention when several Israeli kabbalists denounced the little shiksa tart for recording a song about esteemed Tzfat kabbalist Yitzhak Luria (Madonna denied it was about him), begins with a chant in Hebrew done by one of Madonna’s Kabbalah Kronies.

But what’s the chant? Why, it’s none other than “Im nin’alu daltei n’divim, daltei marom lo nin’alu,” the beginning of one of the many piyyutim (devotional poems) by 17 century Yemenite weaver and paytan Shalom Shabazi.

But wait, you say. Haven’t I heard that somewhere before? Of course you have. It was the centerpiece of the ’80s-era Israeli and worldwide hit “Im Nin’alu” (Number 15 on US Modern Rock chart), by the Yemenite Israeli pop princess cruelly christened as “the Israeli Whitney Houston” Ofra Haza. The Telegraph’s Christopher Howse explains it all in a brief piece.

Unfortunately for curious gentiles, Howse isn’t much of a researcher and nabbed his translation, without credit, from hebrewsongs.com, whose transliteration and translation of “Im Nin’alu” was apparently done by someone whose knowledge of Hebrew is more along the lines of “curt nod when passing in the hall” than “intimacy.”

“Im nin’alu daltei n’divim
Daltei marom lo nin’alu
El Chai, mareimawm al kawruvim
Kulawm b’rucho ya’alu
El Chai

If there be no mercy left in the world,
The doors of heaven will never be barred.
The Creator reigns supreme, and is higher
than the angels
All, in His spirit, will rise”

I would use a non-stupid transliteration, and translate it as “If the doors of the generous are closed, the doors of the Heights are not closed. The Living God reigns over the cherubs. In his spirit, all will rise.”

Anyway, is it fair that poor Ofra, who never had massive, Madonna-style worldwide fame, and died tragically from AIDS she got from a blood transfusion, and by all accounts was a totally sweet lady, should get her “Im Nin’alu-to-Dance-Music” idea completely stolen, without credit, by Madonna, who uses it to sell a ton of records and spread her Kaballah shtuyot? If Madonna is really so deeply initiated in the Jewish mystical rites, couldn’t she dig a little deeper into the huge library of piyyutim? Will Madonna’s next album have as leadoff singles “Dror Yikra” and “Yom Zeh Mekhubad”?

Madonna: you suck. Isn’t it time to have a midlife crisis and get back in touch with your Catholic roots?

Khaled Abu Toameh reports in The Jerusalem Post about the latest victims of lawlessness in Gaza:

Sources in Gaza City said at least four gunmen armed with Kalachnikov rifles broke into the zoo late at night. After they handcuffed the guard and locked him up in the cafeteria, the thieves first stole two white and grey parrots that speak a few words in Arabic … The thieves managed to seize the lion after throwing a blanket over its head. Their attempt to capture a second lion failed after the animal showed fierce resistance.

They have a zoo in Gaza??? Anyhow, the Scarecrow and the Tin Man were unharmed. Sorry. I couldn’t resist.

Reunited after 61 years were a Jewish woman who as a girl was hidden by a young Polish woman and her savior. The Polish woman, Joanna Zalucka, saved the life of Ruth Gruener who after being hidden survived the war and was able to rejoin her parents and move the US.

Gruener’s survival in their hometown of Lvov, Poland, was a miracle as well; she and her parents were the only ones from an extended family of 300 who survived the Holocaust.

Her father smuggled her out of the ghetto under his overcoat and placed her with Zalucka’s family because he expected to be slaughtered.

Ukrainian nationalists had already begun ransacking Jewish homes at night. Families disappeared in waves, presumably taken away to concentration camps.

“I heard screams every evening,” Gruener said. “To a child’s ears, it was just horrible.”

Ruth spent most of her eight months at Zalucka’s home just sitting in a chair, afraid to even look out the window from Joanna’s bedroom. Joanna, then 18, was in charge of keeping an eye on the girl.

When visitors came, the 8-year-old would hide under Joanna’s bed or duck into a trunk. Ruth spent so much time silent and immobilized that she had to relearn how to walk and speak normally. After eight months, Ruth was brought
to the home of another Christian family that hid her parents for another two years.

Needless to say, had Joanna been caught harboring a Jew, she would have been killed. And yet, she did it. Along with recognition, she is receiving pension and medical assistance from The Jewish Foundation for the Righteous. They are now on my list of charities to support this coming year.

So we’re a mega-blog now (according to Jewsweek)? Did I really say that we offer “a glimpse into the future of mainstream Judaism?” Wow. What hubris! That Town Crier dude was right, speaking only for myself, I may indeed have a pole up my rumpuss. I have no idea why we get the attention we do (really, Lisa – no idea, I swear). I mean friggin Esther is a star as far as I’m concerned, but she’s a relatively recent addition. Michael’s writing is always entertaining, and even when he doesn’t write, the mess of his life always gives me a chuckle (anyone in Jerusalem need an experienced and reliable house sitter btw?). Laya always surprises me with the depth and sensitivity she demonstrates on her posts – I mean you look at the blonde hair, then read what she writes and it just doesn’t make sense… I am TheMiddle’s biggest fan, even if I don’t always agree with him – his insight and fastiduousness are always awe inspiring, even if he gets cranky sometimes. Muffti I just kinda feel sorry for and I hope his work on Jewlicious will qualify him for a job as a naked houseboy once he gets his PhD in Philosophy this year. Sorry, that’s Doctor Houseboy … And me? I am SOOOO nobody – a simple Moroccan Jew who knows shit from shinola. So like, who cares what we have to say? Why are you here? I know Lisa eloquently explains the blog thing in general when she stated:

To get a true picture, you have to read what ordinary people on the ground – people who write honestly and who are not being paid for expressing their thoughts and opinions or censored by an editor – are seeing and thinking.

But I don’t know. I never really did. I am just going to assume it’s because of the pretty pictures and occasional flash of cheesecake. Thanks for putting up with me – and I extend that thanks to my fellow posters who I occassionally annoy, my fellow bloggers who I often annoy and you guys who keep coming back. Well, anyways, I am off to celebrate Buy Nothing Day the Sabbath. Shabat Shalom!

P.S. Thanks for the plug Alli! Come back to us!

Today is Adbuster’s official Buy Nothing Day, where:

For 24 hours, millions of people around the world do not participate — in the doomsday economy, the marketing mind-games, and the frantic consumer-binge that’s become our culture. We pause. We make a small choice not to shop.

It also happens to be the beginning of official “Shabbat” day, where for a whopping 25 hours, millions of observant Jews the world over agree not only to both buy nothing, but also to drive nowhere, stepping back from the consumer binge and shopocalypse as well as helping decrease our dependence on foreign oil while simultaneously giving the ozone a break. We aid water conservation by not taking showers. We also agree to not allow electronic media to interfere with our interpersonal relationships and spend the day connecting to friends and family as human beings, not MSN’s or voices on the telephone. We allow intimacy to grow between us because we are in no rush. We connect and converse in the classic way of all humanity, over a table of good food and wine. We step back to remember what it is to be human.

We do this not just once a year but 52 times a year. Damn, Jews are so hip.

Viva la Shabbat!

Take THAT, Adbusters.

ps, great minds think alike (ie, yes Jewschool, i know you got to it first, but I had this in mind since picking up Culture Jam months ago)

One of the more difficult challenges facing those who might consider moving to Israel is the issue of how one might make a living, pursue a career, and feed their family.

I stumbled across a notice by Israel’s Foreign Ministry and if you’re a scientist, this might be a good resource for you. Visit this site for their 112 current research openings in Israel.

Happy Thanksgiving to all our American friends!
Here in Jerusalem, Americans still cling to their outmoded and foreign customs, refusing to integrate with society at large. They speak the language of the old country and live in enclaves or ghettos if you will, stubbornly clinging to a lifestyle ill-suited to the rigors of the middle east. At no time is this more apparent than during Thanksgiving. All along Emek Refaim, the heart of anglo Jerusalem, Americans have booked every available table in order to celebrate the feast of Thanksgiving. At such a meal, the average American will consume enough food to feed a typical Israeli family for 1.4 days. Walking down the street one hears only English and woe unto the waiter, waitress or bartender whose command of the language is less than stellar.

While this is ostensibly a day of celebration, openness and grace, here it’s all about Americans and American-style consumption. Nowhere is this more apparent than at Norman’s Steak ‘N Burger, an upscale meat restaurant in the heart of Emek Refaim, home of the one pound Kahuna and 2 pound Sumo burgers. Despite the fact that the owner of Norman’s is a Canuck, every table was booked till 3 am with American expats celebrating Thanksgiving. To get people into the spirit, all the staff wore face paint and Indian feathers as modeled above by our good friend Yoni (husband of Simone). Being a vegetarian with no prior reservations, I didn’t eat there, but man did it look like everyone was having a good time! Well, next Thanksgiving in Jerusalem! הודו לה כי טוב

Heh… get it?

Muffti doesn’t keep up much on Celebrity news (he doesn’t want to intrude on Esther/CK territory) but he noticed this in the Jpost.com and thought he’d blog it up while he sits in the airport waiting for his delayed flight. Infamous pop hero Michael Jackson uttered some embarrassing thoughts that were caught on tape. Here’s a cute little excerpt:

They suck them like leeches. … They start out the most popular person in the world, make a lot of money, big house, cars and everything and end up penniless. It’s a conspiracy. The Jews do it on purpose.

The tapes are part of a lawsuit by former advisor Dieter Wiesner.

Anyhow, the ADL’s National Director, Abe Foxman, earned his salary by taking instant actions with the following tough words:

Michael Jackson has an anti-Semitic streak, and hasn’t learned from his past mistakes. It seems every time he has a problem in his life, he blames it on Jews. It is sad that Jackson is infected with classically stereotypical ideas of Jews as all-powerful, money-grubbing and manipulative.

Foxman showed his extensive knowledge of Jackson-ography by citing a previous conflict between Jacko and Jewish groups:

We had hoped that Jackson would have learned from his mistakes. While he apologized for, and later removed the anti-Jewish lyrics in “They Don’t Care About Us,” it is clear now that he never was able to completely remove the bigotry from his own heart.

The song originally contained the following lyric:

…Jew me,
sue me,
everybody do me,
kick me,
kike me…

Nice work Abe!

Muffti isn’t really sure what the message meant, and for all he knows it was taken out of context. Nonetheless, it’s never nice to be called a ‘leech’. Especially by a child molester circus freak.

Ya Libnan, a Lebanese News Web site, recently wrote about the discovery of a steamy love letter sent by an Israeli woman to her lover in Lebanon. The letter, sent by a courrier pigeon, thanked her boyfriend for a “terrific night they spent together.” The bird and the message landed on the roof of Ahmed Kamel Zaytoun in south Lebanon’s Kfar Tibnit township on Friday. Ahmed, seeing the Hebrew, realized that the bird came from Israel and may have been carrying a bird flu virus. So he rushed it to the Lebanese Ministry of Agriculture to determine whether was in fact contaminated. This received extensive coverage on Lebanese TV and touched off a regional panic as nervous Lebanese awaited the lab results.

Today’s Jerusalem Post added a little clarification to this story. The pigeon did indeed originate in Israel. The message was written not by one but by two (!!) women – seminary girls no less. Before filthy thoughts fill your head, you should know that the love letter was addressed to Uga (Hebrew for cake, not Arabic for Studly) and Uga is the name of the pigeon. This was all part of a field trip organized by the girls’ seminary wherein the students simulated life in Israel during the time of the Mishna – wearing period costumes, riding on donkeys, sleeping in tents and communicating… via carrier pigeon. The pigeon was meant to go to the kibbutz that ran the program as a kind of thankyou note. Instead, as has been happening a lot recently, it got lost and found its way into south Lebanon. Read all about it here.

So all you Lebanese out there can temper your embarassment with the knowledge that the pigeon was not part of some covert Israeli operation to spread avian flu in Lebanon. Also, the seminary girls involved, Detroit teen Rachel Greenbaum and her friend Stacey Gertz of Chicago would like Uga back. No word from the Israeli government yet about how many jailed Palestinian and Hizbullah terrorists will be freed in exchange for the Israeli pigeon.

Here’s some preciously funny dialogue from the Web site of a Jewish Yeshiva-trained pimp adult human resources manager and online marketing expert. This is a conversation between him and one of his new, uh, staff members:

“So, you are a Muslim?” I ask.
“Yes”, replies sb_.
“Then why are you eating that pepperoni stick?”
“Why not?”
“Pepperroni is made with pork”.
At 140 km/h (90 mph), sb_ opens the car window and starts to hurl.

How sweet. They’re not all as charming as Julia Roberts I guess. This and other gems available at theurbanpimp.com. Look for a book deal soon.

A little sick of hearing the All American Rejects whine on the radio about their dirty little secret? Wish you could hear some music with a message? Made by people who were in it for more than the chicks and the benjamins? Stuff that isn’t produced and sung by sorority girls in clubs while they swill down cheesy pink drinks and get fooled into thinking they are getting drunk?

Our second winner of the hate site of the weak is the place for you. Resistance Records has been around for a while, dealing in only the best of hate music. There are many facets to this site. You can find such classic white power bands as RaHoWa (short for ‘Racial Holy War’, Muffti is told), Skrewdriver, and Johnny Rebel. You can find newer, kinder songs by our fav little racialist twins, Prussian Blue. You can read thoughtful reviews of the albums such as:

HOW COULD ANYONE SAY ANYTHING VULGER ABOUT THESE GIRLS. IF YOUR REALLY WHITE THEN YOU WOULD DO NOTHING BUT SUPPORT OUR YOUTH. QUIT ACTING LIKE NIGGERS. [sic]

Newbies can buy sampler records to dip their toes into the best of white power music.

But that’s not all. The fine race warriors at Resistance Records also run a prolific message board, and provide links to a news service that reports on such tidbits as rise in immigrant crime and charges against holocaust deniers. They also provide mp3 samples on their main page that you can download to try before you buy. (Muffti listened to a few…Cut Throat are pretty wussy but Angry Aryans provide some under-produced punk-metal inspired riffs. The sample from Skrewdriver was a bit dissapointing. Dresden was fucking lame. Check them out for some of the lamest hate music you could ever not want to hear. Muffti confesses to seeing the most promise in a band called Vaginal Jesus who sound a bit like GWAR until you remember they aren’t intentionally being funny. Worst band that Muffti sampled goes to New Storm Rising whose sample sucked so hard that nothing could possibly suck more than it. Oh well.)

Not interested in music, aryan-interest news or posting? Resistance Records runs a store for products ranging from magazines (i.e. Final Conflict), books (i.e. DACHAU: THE HOUR OF THE AVENGER) and clothing (remember those cute li’l happy face Hitler t-shirts Lamb and Lynx were wearing? They sell them here in case you need an outfit for your next innapropriate costume party).

But seriously, Jewlicious readers; there is some sick shit here. And there is lots of it. And it’s well organized and easy to buy at reasonable prices. Don’t kid yourself into thinking that all haters are incompetent loons who just drool and rave day and night about ZOG and the travails of the white christian Aryan in an increasingly multicultural world. This site shows that with some effort, they can be organized and efficient at least on the marketing end of things. We can only thank hashem that the music and apparel sucks so hard that no normal person would ever deign to buy it. Though, at their best, the music still beats on the All American Rejects and everything by Bon Jovi.

Hevron Arabs are fed up with ISM-ers Western ways.

See, when they aren’t busy harrasing IDF soldiers, and standing in front of bulldozers, it seems these paragons of social virtue are interfering with the religious and social values of the people they are supposed to be helping.

Several local Arab residents told the Kol Ha’Ir newspaper that the activists have been exposing the local youths to drug use and sexual promiscuity … One interviewee told Kol Ha’Ir that the volunteers show a disregard for the religious norms of the local villages and teach the local youth to reject and disrespect the traditions of their forefathers. “These anarchists come here and undermine the education we give our children. At first we took them in with hospitality – after all, they claimed they wanted to help us, so why kick them out? But very quickly they infuriated me with their lewd behavior.”

There have also been complaints of ISM volunteers inflaming violence. Go figure.

So, in an unusual tale of common interest between the two groups, the Arab population of Hevron asked the the Jews of Hevron to help by replacing the ISM volunteers with Arabic speaking Jews to help maintain peace.

Jews and Arabs in Hevron getting along? Arabs asking Jews for help? What next? World hunger ends and daisies bloom in Siberia?

Beneath the Rising Sun /
With all Their Kids Committing Suicide
Many Israelis have found out whether or not the old adage ’suicide is painless’ is true in the last decade, according to the Ministry of Health. Muffti doesn’t want to alarm our readers, but please try to be nice to CK, Laya (and in a few years Michael):

Married people aged 25 to 64 are much less likely to kill themselves than singles, divorcees or widow(er)s. Men aged 25 to 44 who are widowers or divorced are eight times more l ikely to commit suicide, and singles are four times more likely than married men to kill themselves.

Muffti is now even happier about the Jewschool/Jewlicious un-breakup! The last thing our boys need is anything that might push them over that edge!

The good news is that the Israeli suicide rate is fairly low. It is the cause of less than 1% of deaths in Israel. Amongst 32 comparable countries, Isreal ranks 6th from the bottom. However, when only the male teens are taken into account, we shoot up to 16th out of 32. Elderly women suicide rates is 15th out of 32. So be nice to the crochety lovely, wise old ladies when you see them!

Interested in the battle between the sexes? It turns out that women attempt suicide more often than their male counterparts, but men succeed more often. Which makes us men, ummn, better? Luckier? Hard to say really…

Jews are more likely to kill themselves than arabs, though Muffti doesn’t know if suicide bombers count for the purposes of these stats.

The highest suicide rates in the word seem to be in Lithuania, Russia and Belarus.

Final macabre tidbit: suicide rates are highest in Tel-Aviv and Haifa. They are lowest in Jerusalem. Stay there, CK and co.

For more information see: Jpost.com