Comments on: Andrew Krucoff Bar Mitzvah Invite

By: American Apparel Blog » American Apparel sponsors Gawker Mascot Bar Mitzvah Bash

Mon, 19 Dec 2005 15:00:38 +0000

[...] Receiving his Bar Mitzvah 11 years late during his visit to Israel, American Apparel said “mazel tov” by supplying drinks and donuts. [...]

By: Harry

Harry — Thu, 15 Dec 2005 17:30:30 +0000

Could someone please call me and let me know what the deal is with this evening? Us Israelis of suburbia can’t just jump out of our apartments into a bar in downtown Jerusalem. We need to plan shit. Call me now bitches!

By: Harry

Harry — Thu, 15 Dec 2005 17:26:21 +0000

Smack!

By: esther

esther — Thu, 15 Dec 2005 15:25:08 +0000

Harry, could I have some tzedakah?

By: Harry

Harry — Thu, 15 Dec 2005 14:29:59 +0000

It was a very difficult morning. We should have downed the arak before the davening. The next person who asks me for tzedekah is going to get clocked in the face.

By: michael

michael — Thu, 15 Dec 2005 10:24:49 +0000

Drunk…stoned…Hebrew test in six minutes…I heart bar mitzvahs…

By: ck

ck — Thu, 15 Dec 2005 09:57:34 +0000

The Barmitzvah was very moving! Right now we’re all kinda drunk, so we’ll post pics and shit later. Mobius also has a video. Links to follow.

BTW Vodka and Arak do not mix. At all. Words to live by kiddies.

By: esther

esther — Thu, 15 Dec 2005 06:04:47 +0000

This just in for the Krucoff Bar Mitzvah update: it’s running on Jewish Standard Time. Apparently because some mysterious foods are needed to officially complete the Jewish man-ification of Young Krucoff. So stay tuned, if y’all aren’t sleeping. Time will tell as to whether the next ten minutes will actually have me spectating or sleeping…but in any case, mazal tov.

By: Jewlicious » War on X-Mas

Jewlicious » War on X-Mas — Wed, 14 Dec 2005 23:43:38 +0000

[...] That’s the buzz. Folks wishing you “Happy Holidays!” are not actually expressing their hope that your festive season will be joyous. What they are in fact doing is undermining Christianity and Christian values in America. Well, at least according to folks like Bill O’Reilly and others pissed at inclusiveness and the War on Christmas. The thinly or not so thinly veiled message is “First they killed Christ. Now they want to kill Christmas. Damn those Jews…” I just shake my head at the stupidity. Clearly, the French do not have a monopoly on narrow minded xenophobia. Which makes this blog post so odd – Neil Kramer, a Jew (duh!) going on and on about Andrew Krucoff’s adventures in Jerusalem, how the notion of cool Jews is dumb and then segueing into his take on the War – he’s pro-Christmas. I think. Whatever. read it, it’s funny. Or disturbing. I can’t figure it out. Also in the category of funny/disturbing is American Apparel’s 12 Days of Hanukkah Advent Calendar. OK, I get the point – pull on the date and save money on t-shirts or socks or jackets or whatever. I know American Apparel is very important, but what’s with the Hanukkah thing? It’s not even Hanukkah yet. There are 4 days of sale items left so hurry over and Save! Save! Save! A portion of the proceeds will be used to sponsor Krucoff’s Bar Mitzvah! Just his Bar Mitzvah though, not his briss. Thankfully, it seems that Avraham Baruch Krucoff already had a proper briss – certificate and all! I think I better shut up now. Those anti-histamines are kicking in and I am the highest I have ever been in Jerusalem so far. [...]

By: John

John — Wed, 14 Dec 2005 08:53:47 +0000

I guess the answer for Chutzpah is to move to Israel.

By: Citizen of the Month » LL Cool Jew

Citizen of the Month » LL Cool Jew — Wed, 14 Dec 2005 07:46:20 +0000

[...] As if this wasn’t enough, a few minutes later I’m reading about big-time blogger Andrew Krucoff and how he’s in Israel and he’s never had a bar mitzvah, and now he’s going to have one sponsored by the porno-loving shmata king, Dov Charney of American Apparel. Now, frankly, I didn’t know much about big-time blogger Andrew Krucoff until I wrote a post about big-time blogger Stephanie Klein. Bloggers-in-the-know told me that Andrew Krucoff was even bigger than Stephanie Klein. Now as much as everyone hated Stephanie Klein, at least she wrote some interesting posts. What the hell does this Krucoff do that makes him such a big-shot? Here’s his latest blog. As my mother might say, "Nu?" This guy must be some shmoozer. [...]

By: themiddle

themiddle — Tue, 13 Dec 2005 22:36:22 +0000

Apparently he exposes himself to willing people. All the difference in the world.

Anyway, congrats to Mr. Krucoff and all the best wishes. Next time, if he wants to become a man, there is also another way…

By: ofri

ofri — Tue, 13 Dec 2005 20:40:32 +0000

um, everywhere, melinda, including this very blog. initially it was reported by one miss Claudine Ko of Jane magazine. but i guess she was arguably a willing participant. anyway i’m not saying the guy’s a deviant or anything. he may be. all i was saying was that if that’s an example of his “high sex drive” it’s not a very appealing one, to me at least.

By: bubbe38

bubbe38 — Tue, 13 Dec 2005 20:29:57 +0000

I’m qvelling!!

By: bubbe38

bubbe38 — Tue, 13 Dec 2005 20:29:53 +0000

I’m qvelling!!

By: melinda

melinda — Tue, 13 Dec 2005 20:04:58 +0000

Ofri – Where did you hear that Charney exposes himself to unwilling people?

By: Chutzpah

Chutzpah — Tue, 13 Dec 2005 19:48:31 +0000

Any Dude that can write a Bar Mitzvah Disco book while heading up his own major Union-Free Corporation is sounding very much like my kind of guy. As for unwilling participants, did they ever hear of turning around and walking out? But hey, I’m new to the Charney story, so I don’t have all the details yet and will reserve judgement until I meet him in person, hopefully in his private jet with some champagne and caviar…yeah…that works for me….

By: michael

michael — Tue, 13 Dec 2005 19:24:47 +0000

People who hate on Barry White just don’t understand.

By: ofri

ofri — Tue, 13 Dec 2005 19:15:52 +0000

chutzpah, just because a man likes to expose himself to unwilling participants does not, to me at least, imply that he has great sexual prowess. if the only requirement is that he be rich and super horny, ability to pleasure a woman notwithstanding, i wouldn’t think you’d have trouble finding your dream man. as for your fantasy of having a man who looked remarkably like a walrus sing intolerably cheesy songs whilst you get your freak on, to each his own.

By: Chutzpah

Chutzpah — Tue, 13 Dec 2005 18:36:57 +0000

It’s a deal Michael! But if the CEO fulfills my long sought – after ultimate fantasy I am going to have to shout it from the rooftops. I’ll spare you the gory details but let’s just say it involves Barry White’s Greatest Hits CD.