Not me, by the way

As much as I hate admitting it, while I love Israel, I am not generally enamored of its people. Call me a self hating Israeli if you must. At home my social circle safely consists of mostly ex-pats and the occasional approved Israeli. Out here in Thailand however, I can’t spit without hitting a Hebrew speaker, and what the heck, it’s a little bit of familiarity in a foreign place.

While Israelis moving in packs of three or more are generally loud, obnoxious and unbearable, one or two of them can be fun. So today I hit the open seas in a tri-ak with two of my co-nationalists.

But first an aside: An interesting thing happened on the way to this little island near the Cambodian border – an all too significant amount of money got stolen out of my room. More than the financial loss, which after a days perspective I realize is NOT the end of the world, the real loss was my sense of confidence and safety as a traveler.

It seems the act shook me to the point that out of the turquoise sea today I reverted back to my totally American Jewish understanding of the world and it’s dangers.

For instance, at one point we were approaching a fishing boat far from shore. The Israelis call out to whoever is on board and no one answers, even when we are close enough to almost step right on deck. The ship seems abandoned, nets acast, and I’m wondering if I’m the only one thinking the obvious, they’ve all been eaten by sharks and we’re next.

Still undeterred by this terror, the Israelis (straight out of the army and with the arrogance of invincibility I might add, all except for the vigilant use of sunscreen) row on to a cliff which they scale to jump back into the ocean, assuring me that there is a small spot where the jagged rocks underneath the surface are far down enough.

despite their successful jumps, all I could see was a vision of them awkwardly swimming the kayak back to shore, carrying me and my bloody broken leg. The blood would of course attract the aforementioned sharks, the Israelis, despite putting up a good fight, would be eaten, and the shark, now full, would leave me to drift out to sea and die of dehydration and blood loss.

This is how my brain works. It’s a combination of saturation levels of cinema and growing up a Jew in America, with a history of genetic neurosis that dates back even farther than Woody Allen. As American Jews, we are taught that part of our cultural heritage is worry. If we don’t worry, something might happen. As if it is our concentration on the worst case scenario that is precisely the thing that keeps it from happening.

I loathe it, and I would rather my kids grow up secure in abilities of their own bodies and jumping from cliffs than staying at home afraid of an allergy attack. It’s the grab life by the balls mentality that I like about Israelis, even when they are embarrassing on other levels.

For instance – what on God’s green earth makes Israeli men (and sometimes women) think that underwear is an acceptable substitute for proper swim wear (not that speedos are proper swim wear)? There is nothing less attractive on a man than a pair of wet, sagging, slightly see through briefs. Really though, if we could figure out why they think this is ok, I feel we will have unlocked part of the puzzle of why Israelis act like they do.

As for me, I just gotta watch out for falling coconuts. No, really, they can kill you….

Well… glad you all noticed… It’s pretty much done for now absent a few minor tweaks. As has been noted, the site loads much faster now. We’ve added social bookmarking, live search on the bottom right column and a design that is cleaner, less cluttered and, well… faster! In the future we’re going to add more Ajax enhancements and other stuff to make the surfing experience even better.

For those of you who miss Kathleen, well, here’s another pic of her for you to enjoy. The new “I Love Hashem” Gal is Israeli. Her name is Mor and she lives in Jerusalem. You can, if you insist, get her shirt here. The photo came from a photo shoot I did for the current cover of World Jewish Digest. It’s for a story by Tobin Belzer about Jewish 20- and 30-somethings and what the hell it is exactly that they want. The article discusses Jewish identity and actually fits in rather nicely with Esther’s last post on the topic.

But it is a good question though. And having waded waist deep in the back end of Jewlicious, I’d like to know the same thing. Just what the hell is it that you want?

For instance, do you all want a message board where you can talk to each other freely? Will it be used or will it just languish? Is the comments section enough in terms of discussion? I am also contemplating the possibility of allowing free registration to Jewlicious – meaning, people will be able to register and submit posts which we will moderate. There’ll be no guarantee that posts will get posted but opening Jewlicious up a bit might not be a bad idea. Also subscribers who get their posts approved enough times might be able to eventually become actual regulars, allowed to post whatever they want without moderation.

I am also contemplating a digest system – one that will send periodic notifications of recent posts via email to anyone who chooses to subscribe. You can already subscribe to comments on a particular post (look at the bottom of the comments box) and I am pleased to see that many of you already have. I am also open to any other ideas that anyone might have that would increase this site’s functionality.

I don’t know. These are just random thoughts. I’d of course totally appreciate your feedback. None of these radical ideas have been implemented and none will be without further discussion with the existing Jewlicious gang. But what the hell, we can think about it right?

The track below is titled Beautiful. It’s off of Moby’s new compilation album due to be released in November called Go: The Very Best of Moby. I know no one listens to techno anymore, but Moby’s all growed up now. Even Debbie Harry (Blondie) makes an appearance on the album. I picked this track because, well because you are all so beautiful!

Well, okay, it was just the Minister of Science, Sport and Culture (minister of sport?!).

And he didn’t do it because of anything he did, but rather what the leadership of his party decided to do.

And the Prime Minister, Minister of Defense, and Chief of Staff are all still in place, and the IDF is promoting the very generals and senior officers who gave us the Debacle in Lebanon.

But at least somebody in Israeli politics had the balls to stand up for his values and ideals. One person! One politician! Please somebody make him prime minister some time soon. He’s earned it!

Science, Culture and Sport Minister Ophir Paz-Pines made the expected announcement of his resignation from the cabinet on Monday afternoon and declared his intention to challenge for the Labor Party’s leadership in the May 2007 elections.

Pines made the announcement after the Labor central committee decided the previous day to keep the party in the government, paving the way for the cabinet and the Knesset to approve the addition of Avigdor Lieberman’s Israel Beiteinu party to the coalition.

“I believe that a man has to act in harmony with his conscience,” said Paz-Pines at Monday’s press conference. “I fought as hard as I could, but unfortunately Labor Central Committee members approved Lieberman’s addition to the government.”

“Lieberman is a man who holds racist views and has made statements which are to the detriment of Israel’s democracy,” he said, adding, “I had no choice but to resign.”

…

“I wanted to continue to influence the country. It hurts me to leave, but I cannot remain a minister with someone who holds views which are so contrary to mine,” he added.

Paz-Pines went on to say that he had been in the Labor Party all his life and he had no intention of leaving.

“I cannot quit the party. Therefore, I have decided to challenge for the Labor leadership in May 2007 in order to lead the party back to the right path,” he declared.

“I will be a faithful leader to the party and to the voters,” he said. “Voters will not regret voting Labor under my leadership.”

Thank god there’s still somebody like that out there.

Now let’s review why he’s resigning and discuss Lieberman a bit:

(more…)

What is Jewish identity? There, I asked you. Is it identification with a culture? With tradition? With people within a community?

Whatever your definition of Jewish identity is, now make like the Food and Drug Administration, and institute guidelines for lower-calorie versions of the real thing:

New Jewish Identity: Same general formula, but a little bit sweeter, maybe fizzier. Depends who you ask.

Jewish Identity Classic: Same as it ever was, renamed and repackaged. Shiny, but appeals to traditionalists.

Diet Jewish Identity: Made with half the eggs, a third of the margarine, and whole wheat noodles. And Splenda.

And Jewish Identity ‘Lite’: Now, with half the calories and fat of regular Jewish identity…cholesterol free and with only 2g of carbs per serving!…with all the originally rich guilty taste preserved to intellectually haunt you like a waking nightmare. Spread it on your bagel, cover it with a nice piece of lox and bring it to your next neo-klezmer concert.

In his latest soon-to-be-a-classic piece in the Jerusalem Post, Ariel Beery continues his inquiry into the way our generation relates to and identifies with Judaism, including his reaction to a study put forth by sociologist Steven M. Cohen and historian Ari Y. Kelman, and funded by the UJA-Federation of New York and the National Foundation for Jewish Culture:

The findings show that the majority of the Jews found attending cultural events – parties thrown by Heeb or surrounding klezmer music – already have extensive Jewish backgrounds. Graduates of Hebrew schools, day schools and Camp Ramah, these Jews do have a history of engagement with the Jewish community – even though their current status is formally “unaffiliated.”

This finding turns the tables on many assumptions: If young American Jews are not affiliating despite being more educated and engaged then ever, what causes Jews of my generation to leave the community behind?

(more…)

OK, a little childish.

That’s a moon over Jerusalem. Chances are it was there a couple of thousand years ago too.

Shabbat shalom folks.

Photo source

Far from being detached, the root of any tree constantly provides nourishment for the tree as it grows far above. The constantly inform the tree and support it. When reading Noah this week, I was tapping into the ancient roots of our people, and found issues very much at the forefront of our consciousness: Global climate change, moral relativism, information security and identity theft, privacy, preservation of bio-diversity and the problem of communication, just to name a few.

Our actions and those of our country have far reaching effects on the world we live in. Noah’s generation saw that up close, as they drowned in a flood of their own making. Noah teaches the importance of preserving animals and other species before they are extinguished by our careless destruction of nature. Save the species, the bio-diversity. Noah didn’t just save animals that had a “use” but many species that humans have no use for.

Its not that Noah is a tree-hugging, granola chomping, vegi eating hippie. No, Noah ate meat, with God’s permission, he loved to drink and have a good time. He used the earth for his own pleasure and benefit. But Noah knew that life, nature, and the planet, are gifts that need stewardship, not exploitation and destruction.

Shabbat Shalom

Hmmmm….

Where are the “recent posts” and WHERE IS THE REDHEAD?

UPDATE: Y-Love has clarified his position in comments here and here, saying, among other things, “First of all it is an axiom that G-d does not condone actions like this. That goes almost without saying and I apologize for leaving out precisely how strongly I feel against these actions.”

—–

In response to a YNet article on a recent scourge of attacks on clothing stores that sell allegedly immodest clothing and women who wear it by yeshiva students armed with bleach in Jerusalem’s Charedi neighborhood of Geulah, Chasidic rapper and Jewschool contributor Y-Love has produced what can only be termed as an apologia for for violence against women and the destruction of the property and livelihood of fellow Jews by certain elements of Charedi society in Israel.

I met Y-Love in Jerusalem and was struck by his intelligence and friendliness, not to mention his formidable skills as an MC, so I want to give him the benefit of the doubt and assume that I’m misinterpreting his intent and he did not truly mean to imply that attacking Jewish women (or any women, for that matter) with bleach is a valid reaction to the infiltration of Israeli Charedi society by secular attitudes and fashions – surely a position without basis in Jewish law. But if not, what exactly does Y-Love mean to say with statements such as these?

And then [the Charedi] gets to Jerusalem, and realizes, even here, only 30% of the population in charedi. So he moves to the charedi “black belt” of Jerusalem and realizes that his main thoroughfares are still functional on Shabbos and connects secular communities, and has bus stops with advertising similar to what he left. So he moves again to B’nei Brak or to Me’ah Shearim. He builds walls, fences, he puts up signs, he puts up posters, he screams in the streets, only wanting to have some type of halachically proscribed religious environment, some square inch he can go to as a safe haven from an increasingly secular world.

And all the while, all he hears is “religious fanatic” and how his point of view must be done away with. How he has no rights, not even after paying double, triple the price of a comparable dwelling just to live in a place where he might have a chance to live without compromising his religious observance. Where he might be able to keep that law he learned about in yeshiva, the ones his rebbe told him were so important. But no.

And so, with his value system stripped of legitimacy by the “modern world”, and now unable to shut it out, he is subjected to stimuli day in and day out. With no choice, and no options. The Shulchan Aruch told him not be around something he now can’t escape [immodestly attired women]. And the only people’s rights who matter are the people who don’t have his views.

Y-Love may make valid points about the status of Charedim in Israeli society and how they perceive themselves in relation to the state and their secular brethren, but Charedi alienation, some of which is certainly self-inflicted, is hardly justification for the potential injury of those who live outside of Charedi strictures – and I’m confident that most Charedim would agree.

But what Y-Love fails to mention at all in throwing out the red herring of perceived unwanted secular presence in Charedi neighborhoods is that the recent events in Geulah are almost certainly violence whose target is not secular Jews, but in fact other religious Jews. The Charedim mentioned in the YNet article whose actions Y-Love seems to defend are not throwing bleach on women who wear halter tops and stores that sell womens’ pants (not that such actions would be any more permissible) – they are attacking women and stores in Geulah itself, an entirely religious neighborhood, where all women dress according to the laws of tzniut and the stores cater exclusively to the neighborhood’s wholly religious populace.

What we have in Geulah now is a case of certain Charedim persecuting Jews whose standards of modesty, while doubtless in total conformity with Jewish laws of tzniut as stipulated in the Talmud and the Shulchan Arukh’s Orach Chaim and Even Ha-Ezer, are not in keeping with the further stringencies applied by certain Charedi sects. General Orthodox consensus, based on these sources and others, indicates that for women, modesty in clothing includes: shirts that extend far enough to cover the elbow (that Talmud states in Tractate Ketubot that revealing the entire zroa, the upper arm, is grounds for divorce without the protection of the ketubah); skirts (or other non-male clothing) that extend to cover the knee in both standing and sitting position; hair covering for married women and also divorcees and widows; and a general principle of not wearing clothes that attract undue attention, often interpreted as not wearing clothes that are too loud in color. Everything beyond these basic guidelines, as can be well attested-to with only a cursory survey of the vastly different styles of dress within Orthodox communities, is subject to interpretation.

At least according to some sources, the minhag ha-makom (local custom) has the status of halakha – therefore, if the local custom is to dress above and beyond the minimum specified in the codes of Jewish law, then a woman dressing according to the minimum would be immodestly attired within that community. However, as Geulah is a heterodox neighborhood, with Jews encompassing the entire spectrum of Orthodoxy (although leaning heavily towards the more Charedi side), it cannot be argued that the minhag ha-makom in Geulah requires the absolute strictest interpretation of the laws of tzniut. Yet that appears to be the interpretation of the Charedi extremists in Geulah who feel they have the right to destroy property and physically endanger Jews whose adherence to tzniut does not go as far beyond the letter of the law.

Seeking then to refute Y-Love’s insinuation that a pernicious secular influence was behind the attacks in Geulah, and to demonstrate that Geulah’s clothing stores cater solely to a religious clientele who keeps the laws of tzniut, I went there this morning armed with my camera. I focused mainly on three of the major avenues of Geulah: Yechezkel, Malkhei Yisrael and Strauss, all major shopping districts, the economic heart of the neighborhood, and all close (geographically if not ideologically) to “secular Israel.” If the alleged secular infiltration of the neighborhood’s mores and fashion sense truly existed, it would be doubtless be found there.

What did I find in more than an hour of wandering? All the signs of a thriving and entirely religious neighborhood. Every single clothing store, if the products of a clothing store can be judged by its window display (seemingly a safe assumption) sold only the most modest of clothes. In my time there during one of the neighborhood’s busiest times, Friday morning, I saw two immodestly-attired women: one was a uniformed security guard at a preschool and the other a woman who got off a bus at Kikkar Shabbat and quickly began to head towards downtown. Every single one of the hundreds of women and girls I passed by, save those two, was modestly attired, and the vast majority far beyond the minimum standard. This is not a neighborhood being invaded by secular people. This is not even a neighborhood where secular people enter other than to pass through, because it contains very little that caters to their desires. Its streets are closed on Shabbat, its bus stops (contrary to Y-Love’s claim) contain no immodest advertising, its restaurants are kosher – it is a veritable bastion of the kind of insular religious environment that Y-Love states the average Charedi is seeking. I took pictures of many of the stores I came across (I did not take pictures of people, even if they may have illustrated my points, because I did not want to interfere with anybody’s sense of modesty by photographing them).

(more…)

I’m a little surprised nobody has brought this up since, unlike Conservative and Reform rabbis, this is a positive development for the Jewish people.

More and more women in Jerusalem’s Geula neighborhood have been complaining of being sprayed with a bleach mix.

The attacks mark an escalation of the religious fanatics’ battle against what they refer to as the ‘promiscuity’ on the haredi streets and the infiltration of ‘fashion’ that often times does not correspond with the strict dress codes in the community.

For instance, clothes that may seem modest to most people are considered by religious extremists to be ostentatious if they have shiny or colorful elements to them. Similar claims are made against women who wear overly-tight outfits.

A vendor at one of the local clothing stores said she felt something wet dripping on her shirt as she was walking down the street. At first she thought someone poured water over her, but later realized that she had been sprayed with bleach.

Needless to say, I’m embarrassed for Ynet and its reporter Neta Sela for using language like “religious fanatics” and “religious zealots” when they refer to good ol’ ultra Orthodox yeshiva men.

Muffti was trying to find something but wasn’t able to so he puts it out to our well-informed readers as a question. Muffti was curious about the claim that parts (or all?) of the Torah is to be read in a non-literal fashion; in particular the creation story is held up sometimes as a case of non-literality.

When did this suggestion of non-literal reading first become prevalent? Who first suggested it and how was it received at first?

Thanks in advance.

I admit it, I saw that Harry had the story first about Borat speeking a leetle beet of Heebrew. And I also laughed at this clip, in which Borat tries to train a dog to attack Jews. And now, some fool over at Beliefnet wrote a post about this week’s discovery about Borat speaking Lashon Hakodesh. Sort of. Although I suspect most authorities would agree that once Borat’s done speaking it, it kind of loses some holiness.

Anyway, the reports included one Wikipedia’d report of Borat singing a song with words that include “Koom Bachur Atzel, V’Tze L’Avodah.” Roughly translated, this phrase means “get up, you lazy sumbitch and get yo ass to work.” Which, in addition to being a phrase that I occasionally mutter at myself at various occasions of rent being due in my freelance life, is also part of a Hebrew kids song that I learned way back before there were people who loved the 80s.

But one of the most entertaining Borat-related pieces I’ve read this week has to do with NY-based journalist Liel Liebovitz trying to chase down an interview with his comedic hero for the Jewish Week, only to be refused. Why was the interview denied in the end? As some of you may know, Sacha Baron Cohen, the committed comedian behind the Khazakh kharacter has been appearing only in character, going so far as to don his now-famous green V-thong bathing suit (see this MySpace page for a photo, or–as I recommend–don’t), and answering interview questions as Borat himself. Who is anti-Semitic. And therefore would never talk to a Jewspaper. Sad for Liel. But funny to read about.

Meantime, the actual country of Kazakhstan continues to register its alarm at Borat’s increasing popularity, resulting in accidentally hilarious PR campaigns; one such ad supplement in the NY Times claimed that the country had the world’s largest population of wolves, a claim that was upon investigation proven false. (It’s Canada). Kazakhstani officials have also threatened to sue Cohen, with whom Borat denies any connection (Borat’s response is here.) And the United Arab Emirates has announced plans to send their multiculturalism ambassador, a fictional cat named Mr. Buffy (”a fluffy buff-coloured cat who wears jeans, a yellow shirt, a polka-dot necktie and a red baseball cap”) to Kazakhstan. So it was Cohen gave us Borat, but Kazakhstan itself continues to entertain, even if unintentionally…

So even if an entire country decides to throw us all down the well, at least we’ll plummet while laughing.

Yes, The Kvetcher is in that group.

Follow me here. The Burg is an online sitcom about a group of hipsters who live in Williamsburg. It’s kind of like a Hipster friends, or as Gawker put it “like Rent, only instead of AIDS, some of them have trust funds.” One of the episodes has the distraught Hipsters looking for a new bar to hang out in as their current haunt, Office (a former office) is overtaken by friggin’ NYU students. They consider Slaughterhouse (a former slaughterhouse), Firestation (a former firestation) and Animal Hospital. They try Bathroom (a former bathroom) and Gym (an actual Gym) before they hear about a party where one of the female hipsters, a struggling actress, got a job as a dancer. The bar is called Temple and the party is a Bar Mitzva with entertainment by DJ Shlomo. Watch as hilarity ensues.

(bump added for those still using IE…)

(more…)

The Muffti can’t help but chuckle at the irony: Rabbi Shmuley Boteach is a dude who likes to go around excoriating people (especially men) for being shallow and then manages to routinely give the most shallow ‘analyses’ and advice one could hope for. For all Muffti knows, Shmuely may be a talented therapist. But that’s very different from a general talent for fixing things wrong in a culture, or giving remedies to social problems.

The latest helping of unsurprising, self aggrandizing ho-hum-ness is in Jpost, where you can find some fine examples of what the Muffti is saying. For example, consider this fine example of clever social exploration (emphasis Muffti’s):

Feeling constantly tired as they crumble under the burden of having to work both in the office and at home as well as the lack of emotional support due to the sad state of the American marriage is part of the explanation. Women feeling that their children don’t listen to them exacerbates their feelings of worthlessness and failure. But while these factors contribute to the despondency of the American woman, the greatest cause of her depression is how society is geared toward making women feel inadequate.

Genius! Years of study of female depression has revealed that women feel depression at roughly twice the rate that men do, and one striking feature of women neurophysiology is the relative tendency towards hormonal imbalance compared to men. Another finding contends that women are 3x as likely to respond to stressful life events with depression as men. Genetic factors have been isolated, relative povery levels of men and women, tendency to suffer mental and psychological abuse at early ages and even teh greater tendency of women to engage in ‘ruminative’ thinking than men have been studied. A nice overview of some of the cause of depression can be found on the American Psychological Association Website in a study on the depression in women. But, trust Shmuley to simplify things so you don’t have to engage in messy empirical research. Why bother when you have perfectly qualified speculator to tell you what the real problem is? Of course, Muffti isn’t saying that obsession with beauty isn’t a contributing factor: that’s an interesting matter for study. But simplifying the problem is destructive to finding solution, not constructive. At the very least, he could have given a nod to feminists he is ripping off who have given this issue and at least paid attention the empirical data.

What is Shmuley’s advice for solving the ‘greatest factor in depression’:

It is time for us to emphasize to women and girls from the earliest age that they are good enough, their eyes are bright enough, their minds are sharp enough, their bodies are shapely enough and their personalities charismatic enough. We simply need to allow women to feel good enough so that the nurturers in our culture can be restored to us whole and unbroken.

That is some brilliant advice, Shmuley. The Muffti isn’t advocating not doing this: of course it is a generally a good idea to make people feel better about themselves. Few people in their right mind could deny it! That’s the essence, after all, of a triviality! (Q: ‘Rabbi, what should one do?’ A: ‘be good!’)

What Muffti really can’t stand about this kind of thing is that, in standard Boteach form, he has taken a complex, multifaceted problem such as depression and boils it down to the most trite, bland level that one could hope for. Not to make the solution outshine the diagnosis of the problem, a platitude is offered as the real solution to the problem.

But, Muffti supposes, this should be no surprise from someone whose training is religious rather than empirical study. One might just have wished that someone versed in studies that are truly penetrating, pervasive and reasoned such as the Talmud would carry over such general principles to the study of other phenomenon. Guess this should teach us a lesson in cognitive science: competence isn’t always transferrable.

If you’ve ever been to Venice Beach California, you may have noticed this little synagogue right on the boardwalk. Can’t remember? Let me help – it’s the building right next door to the Sexetera Sex Shop. Aaaah… now you remember? Well, the LA Times reports that the The Pacific Jewish Center in Venice, a.k.a. The Shul On The Beach, is hoping to build an eruv around much of Santa Monica, Venice and Marina del Rey. This eruv, which is a boundary, will allow the practicing members of the Jewish community to carry things like keys and canes on the sabbath. It also allows for the use of strollers and wheelchairs. Proponents of the eruv also mention that Jews would now be able to have sabbath picnics on the beach and that the eruv will encourage more tourism from observant Jews.

The boundary will be marked by invisible fishing line so as to be as unobtrusive as possible, although some are concerned that birds will fly into the wire and hurt themselves. The California Coastal Commission, the regulatory body that has the final say on whether the eruv goes up or not, has rejected the application for that reason, but the synagogue is working on a plan that involves wire only visible to birds.

Eruv boundaries have been quietly popping up in several parts of Los Angeles as the Orthodox population has increased. In addition to the one on the Westside, there is an eruv in the San Fernando Valley, and [Pacific Jewish Center Rabbi] Geiger helped create one in Irvine a few years ago… Lea Geller, a synagogue member, said she has had to forgo attending services for five years because she has three small children. The eruv would make it possible for her to participate in synagogue activities and to enjoy walking at the beach and picnicking with her family… “So much of religion is socializing and community,” she said. “This isn’t a luxury. It will allow us to function as a community.”

Cool! I mean an Orthodox beachfront synagogue in SoCal is already noteworthy. But the possibility of an eruv equipped beach? Think of the possibilities! I hope they work it out. And now, if you like, you can listen to Jesus and Mary Chain’s 1998 cover of Surfin’ USA off their album Barbed Wire Kisses. Click on the audio link below.

But remember! Eruv or no eruv, surfing is not allowed on the sabbath!

From Haaretz:

New law calls for closing bars at 2 a.m.
The Ministerial Committee on Laws, which is a sub-committee of the cabinet, approved a law proposal 5-2 on Sunday that calls for all bars and pubs to close their doors at 2:00 a.m.

At present, bars in Israel are not required by law to close at a certain hour.

The proposal was presented by Kadima MK Ruhama Avraham, who said, “The popularity of the proposal is not a consideration, rather its ability to save lives.

“The scourge of violence and the slaughter on the roads must be answered,” she said.

Similar drinking laws have been adopted in many states in the US, as well as England, Ireland, Sweden, Belgium and Norway. The law was recently implemented in Tokyo, Japan.

As far as the effectiveness of the law, some research points to as much as a 50 percent decrease in violent acts during the late hours of the night, and as much as a 20% decrease in weekend road accidents during those hours.

The phrase ’some research’ alwasy sounds fishy to Muffti. His own research confirmed that, unless there is a good after hours party scene, such laws are associated with a 43% drop in fun. strange bedfellows bar owners and police have both denounced the bill.

The Jerusalem Post interviews a few of the remaining Jews in Bahrain:

…as many as 1,500 Jews once lived in Bahrain. Nearly all of them came from Iraq … The community is dying out …There is no rabbi here, so all religious ceremonies must be conducted abroad. Most of the people who are still in Bahrain are single. There’s not much to choose from, and there are very few cases of intermarriage between Jews and Arabs… The community at one point wanted to convert the [rarely used synagogue] for another use or give it to charity, but the government wouldn’t let us. They insisted it remain as a synagogue… We’ve never been to Israel, we have nobody there, and because we hold Bahraini passports we cannot travel to Israel … As far as we’re concerned, whatever the government will not let us do, we will not do. We’re law-abiding citizens.

I went to college with a Bahraini Princess. Her family name was Al-Khalifa. She was a total pain in the ass. I bet she’s really ugly now… That wasn’t relevant at all. In fact, the only reason I posted this was so that I could use the title.

I’m singin’ just singin in Bahraaaaain!

Borat tries to adopt a dog from an American kennel. He hopes to use it to hunt Jews and for “sexytime.” When it’s old he will eat it. The clip above is a deleted scene from Sasha Baron Cohen’s new movie “Borat’s Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan.” Click on the more link below to see the first 4 minutes of the film and listen closely – apparently the language of Kazakhstan is remarkably similar to Hebrew! The movie is in Theatres Nov. 4.

(more…)

Well folks, it has come to this: Yigal Amir, the murderer of Yitzhak Rabin, has been permitted to have a 10 hour conjugal visit with his wife, Larissa Trimbobler, for the purposes of pro-creation. Apparently murderers of people and national dreams have the right to procreate, according to the Israeli High Court, and since fertility treatments weren’t effective and may have been physically harmful to Larissa, the prison authorities have agreed to facilitate the conjugal visit.

The happy couple will enjoy their marital and conjugal bliss inside a room within the prison. Ms. Trimbobler may bring some personal effects as well as dried fruits and cookies and Yigal Amir may bring some kosher food. We can assume that there will be some crying and joy involved even though all Amir could muster at his own sentencing for murder was a smirk.

My problem is that the room seems a little bare. After all, this may be one of the few times in their entire lives that the couple will have the chance to be together and surely they would seek more than this unadorned room and bed. If there were enough time, we could send over some of the designers from Home & Garden TV channel to redo the space. For example, I would think a large framed photo of Yitzhak Rabin above a large framed Hebrew quotation of that commandment, you know the one…don’t murder, would be perfect on the wall overlooking their bed. Needless to say, the color red, representing Rabin’s spilled blood, would be splashed liberally around the room in places such as the sheets or the walls. The bathroom can be wallpapered with images of crying Rabin family members and all the lamps in the room can have long cords shaped like hanging nooses. Above, on the ceiling, I would write in large capital Hebrew letters in biblical script: MURDERER. That way, when Amir is resting after the act, he can look at it and when Larissa is in the act, she can look at it.

I feel sorry for Ms. Trimbobler that she fell in love with a vicious, unreprentant murderer, but she should know that this room is a room of death, not of life. Oh yeah, Amir’s family is happy for him but they and Ms. Trimbobler are unhappy that the details of this conjugal visit have been made public. I think they are forgetting their son is a public figure by his own choice.

Maps of War (hat tip to Mentalblog)

Hi, I’m Casey Kasem and welcome to Arabian Top 40, a list of the top 40 Arab brands on the market today: will Al-Jazeera once again top the chart? And what about up-and-comer Patchi chocolate? And will Future TV continue its meteoric rise to the top fueled by teen-oriented programs such as Super Star, Project Fashion, and the comedy La Youmal?

Mecca Cola’s at #31. Two Apples Hookah Tobacco is at #38. How do your favorite Arab brands rank? Check this slideshow list over at Forbes.com and see for yourself.

And until next time, keep your feet on the ground, and keep reaching for the skies, where dwelleth Muhammad, PBUH, prophet of Allah and redeemer of the Muslim people.

Jen Taylor Friedman, famous for being the first (only?) female sofferet (or scribe – trained to inscribe mezuzahs and Torahs etc. which have to be written by hand) had some extra time on her hands recently and decided to create Tefillin Barbie, pictured here.

Jen’s friends of course love Tefillin Barbie, as do the usual suspects. DovBear I guess took a more neutral approach, but his commentors mixed it up a bit. My take? There’s nothing wrong with women wearing tefillin. Women are not obligated to wear them – they are excused from all mitzvas that are time based and since tefillin have to be worn on weekday mornings at specific times then the mitzva of wearing them isn’t imposed on women. However, should a woman decide to start wearing tefillin and a talit then she has to do so always – thus rabbis generally advise against it.

Tefillin Barbie bugs me because the lower part of her Tefillin Shel Rosh (the head part) is below her hairline and thus incorrectly worn. And then of course there is the issue of Barbie herself who represents a depiction of beauty that is not only not particularly Semitic, but also impossible to attain – no real woman has boobs that big and a waist that tiny.

Beauty Myth Hello!

Then there’s the Hebrew Steinsaltz Talmud that Barbie is holding (as opposed to the usual Aramaic one) implying perhaps that women don’t have the intellectual fortitude for a traditional talmud? I’m not even going to comment on the blue fringe on the tzizit!

And what of the tznius (modesty) issue? Barbie’s arms aren’t covered and that skirt looks awfully tight! That’s not so much of an issue for me. Women in my Sephardic Orthodox synagogue wear pants and short sleeves and no one says boo. Try to tell them they’re being immodest and they will literally tear your eyes out. They’re plenty modest! But amongst the Ashkenazic Yeshivish crowd this is apparently quite an issue! I can write a whole other post just about the “Hot Channie” phenomenon that was brought to the fore in part due to the discussion on Tefillin Barbie. Check out the Hot Chanie Blog where an attractive, well put together Orthodox Mom takes umbrage with those in her community who look down upon her nice sheitel (wig), gym enhanced body and attractive clothing (like skirts with a slit!!) which technically follow the rules of tznius but are still far too attractive to be tznius (according to them). Hot Chanie believes that tznius does not need to mean frumpy (Oh Renegade Rebbetzin!).

Whatever. The point is that whoever you are, if you’re going to wear tefillin, wear them properly. Like me! (in this pic my head tefillin is improperly placed on my head with the lower part below my hairline. That’s because of the cowboy hat and I was still putting on my tefillin. I always make last minute adjustments so don’t flame me ok?)

Hat tip: boing boing. Now go on, click on the audio link below. I know you want to Barbie Girl!

…and yes, there’s video too, after the bump.

(more…)

What is gossip? Is blogging gossip? Is discussion of celebrity weirdness gossip? What are gossip’s defining qualities?

OK, I admit that there’s a substantial element of self-promotion to this post. This Tuesday night, I’m facilitating “Gossip on the Internet: A Sin or Just a Sign of the Times?” at the Ideas Cafe at the Skirball Center on the Upper East Side. (It’s $10–which includes wine, cheese, coffee and various other snacks–but if you email me, I’ll get you comped. See “Plus, for you, a bargain” below.)

But seriously, folks–you’re actively engaged in blogculture, perhaps even reading Gawker, Defamer and other self-described gossip blogs. You regularly participate in our critical discussions of various topics, often attacking the opinions of others (because attacks on others themselves would never happen here at Jewlicious)–at some point, does that cross over into the realm of gossip? And is gossip only gossip if it’s about people who are good? What if we said that Hitler’s mother was a hamster and his father smelt of elderberries? Would that be gossip? And does it matter whether or not it’s true?

If you’re in NYC and are free, come on by to the Ideas Cafe (more detailed info–including a SPECIAL OFFER–below). But if you’re not, feel free to discuss here.

A descriptive paragraph to entice you: Our sense of right and wrong tells us gossip – however pervasive – is wrong, but restraint is hard. In the age of the Internet it’s next to impossible. With the most powerful, ever-expanding grapevine in human history at our keyboarded fingertips, gossip is both easier and more viral. Anonymity removes accountability. But where is the blurry line between the useful and the malicious? How do we decide what’s true and what’s hearsay, what’s harmless and what’s slander? What ethics apply? And should celebrities, who choose to live in the public eye, be treated differently from the rest of us? Join us to discuss these and other questions at Ideas Café, a Tuesday evening salon in a Jewish environment open to all voices.

Plus, for you a bargain: There’s a $10 entrance fee–which includes wine, cheese, coffee and various other snacks–which you can have waived by being on the magic list. To be on the magic list, email me by Tuesday morning, and your entrance will amazingly be comped! Ta-da!

WHAT Ideas Café – a weekly salon for open discussions of issues of the day – will consider the guilty pleasure of “Gossip on the Internet” and explore whether it’s a “sin” or just a sign of the times – and what rules and ethics should apply.
WHEN 8 p.m. Tuesday, October 24, 2006
WHERE Skirball Center for Adult Jewish Learning. Enter at 10 East 66th Street (Nearest subway stop: #6, East 68th St.)
COST $10 at the door ($5 for Skirball Center students).
NOTE For information and weekly topics visit www.ideascafe.org or call (212) 507-9580. The Skirball Center for Adult Jewish Learning – a unique New York City educational facility in its fifth year – offers a wide range of programs and courses exploring what it means to be a human being and Jewish in the 21st century.

The movie “I’m Your Man” about Leonard Cohen is interspersed with numerous cover versions of his songs. Some are good, some are mediocre, maybe one or two excel. Some of what Cohen has to say is interesting and watching him age is both sad and amazing. The one song that I thought stood out, however, was not a cover but Cohen singing his own “Tower of Song” with Edge and Bono from U2. There’s something about the way he sings his own words that clarifies his intention and meaning more clearly than anybody else can convey.

Click on this to hear it.