Ilana Donna is an online video guru for The Associated Press and runs her own site, Downtown Diary, dedicated to the trials and tribulations of NYC life.

Ilana’s SJPisms on daily life are a tad reminiscent of those “Sex & The City” days, especially her vlog post dedicated to online dating. It doesn’t hurt that this gal’s mane is to die for and bears a striking resemblance to you-know-you. Ilana has been featured on Beet.TV and even the Food Network(!).

Below is Ilana’s most recent work – a pop culture take on “A Mighty Heart” that first appeared here. Be sure to visit the site for more Ilana. Enjoy!

Amy Winehouse’s latest public display of daddy-didn’t-love-me enough f*cked up starlet on coke is all the news in Britain. In the U.S., we have Paris Hilton to fill this role, but ok, ok, that designation doesn’t do justice to Amy’s talent or level of genuine self-destructive behavior.

So what’s the 23-year-old’s latest controversy that’s got everyone talking both her and abroad?

In a photo shoot for Spin magazine this past week, Amy took to picking up a piece of broken mirror and carving her stomach with the words “I Love You Blake” on her belly. Blake Fielder-Civil would be Amy’s husband of one month who was filming the shoot and caught the glass-cutting episode (sure to be sold to the highest British tabloid buyer when marriage goes sour). Amy later scoffed at her behavior likening her cutting episode with “chicken scratch.”

Still, in Amy’s defense glass cutting can’t be all the much of a departure from tattoo sleeves. What’s one sterile form of self-mutilation among body art aficionados?

For more Amy, be sure to check her out here.

You can see the menorah all the way in the back if you squint. For a larger version of this image, go to World As Eye See it’s larger image.

This is Jerusalem, as you can see from the limestone quarried around Jerusalem called Jerusalem Stone.

Shabbat shalom to you and your families!

Hamas is clearly sensitive to criticism about their behavior which is probably why they haven’t thrown anybody off a roof in about 10 days. As part and parcel of the “new look” Hamas, they have decided to terminate the use of the Mickey Mouse clone, “Farfour” who became notorious for wishing death to the Jews (of course, as usual, a little movement to claim the translation was false and the little mouse didn’t actually say that the Jews should be killed suddenly appeared over all sorts of websites, but they’re having a tough time gaining traction outside of far Left circles).

Anyway, whereas Tony Soprano was probably killed at the end of the final episode of Sopranos, viewers felt cheated because the screen went to black and nothing specific was seen or heard, leaving it up to us to figure out what had happened, Hamas had a different idea. No cutting to black for these lovers of peace and children. Nuh uh. They put on a little play for the kids in which Farfour is beaten to death by an Israeli. The Israeli is trying to buy land and the effervescent big mouse that infringes Disney’s copyright (but belongs to the one group that Disney fears more than attorneys) tries to stop him and is beaten until dead. The show refers to him as a martyr and to the Israeli as a terrorist.

Lovely and first rate children’t programming = Hamas TV. I suspect that if there were a psychology association in Gaza, they’d be busy people.

And then some people wonder why Hamas shoots people to whom they had offered amnesty.

Okay, okay, the Mickeyboobs image had nothing to do with Hamas. But I think they should consider those as their next bit of TV programming for children. What’s better than one Mickey? Two!

And now for your final viewing pleasure, here is Farfour!

Today was the second day of staff meetings for the upcoming ROI120 Summit. Many sleepless nights caught up with me as I struggled to stay awake during our session today, but I’m pretty sure I caught the vast majority of what was discussed. Now, the details are unimportant but I couldn’t help but be touched by how a relatively diverse group of people with different backgrounds and approaches to their Judaism were nonetheless united in their desire to promote the values and ideals represented by ROI120. And what are those values and ideals? Well, ROI120 seems like it’s evolving into a real world manifestation of Web 2.0 – with user generated content representing a grass roots movement to define and almost reinvent Jewish leadership and innovation. In that respect, one of our challenges as moderators is not so much to guide the participants, but to help make the most of this fantastic networking opportunity – to make the most of the relatively brief time we have together so as to maximize the synergy potential when so many exceptional individuals gather. I don’t know about you, but I am almost giddy with excitement, big Jew geek that I am! Tonight we’re going to attend a Shabbat dinner with philanthropist extraordinaire, Lynn Schusterman. This time Lyndsay Litowitz (Tikkun Olam track moderator) and I will try not to dress exactly alike.

Below is a film shot this morning, edited and placed online by our Online Video Consultants Sara Liss and Avery Pack. Here you’ll be able to meet some of the other track moderators and watch me screw up a simple intro. Awesome job Sara and Avery!

I told you I was tired!

Hey! Lollapalooza man! Started in 1991 by Perry Farrell, Lollapalooza represented youth culture in the 90’s in much the same way Woodstock did in the 60’s. At its best, this traveling festival featured edgy, non-mainstream bands. At it’s lowest point it became over-commercialized, as represented by the inclusion of friggin’ Metallica in 1996. Not surprisingly, the increasingly convoluted festival folded operations shortly thereafter in 1997. Attempts to revive the brand started in 2003 and after a few fits and starts Lollapalooza has morphed into a weekend destination festival taking place in Chicago’s Grant Park.

This year’s lineup includes grunge artists Pearl Jam and French Electronica masters Daft Punk as well as Iggy Pop, Modest Mouse, Interpol, the Yeah Yeah Yeahs, The Roots, Patti Smith, etc. The Jewesses are in the house as well with Amy Winehouse and Regina Spektor amongst the headliners. But I think we can do with more Jews at Lollapalooza, and that’s where you come in.

Let me tell you a little about Y-Love. Here’s a quick description from the Lollapaloza Web site:

Y-Love (Yitz Jordan) is an MC unlike any other; he converted to Orthodox Judaism in 2000, and later took on the traditions of Hasidism (the mystical branch of Orthodox Judaism). He is among the most innovative MCs on the scene, weaving seamless polyglot rhymes in English, Arabic, Yiddish, and Hebrew. Most unique is Y-Love’s revival of Aramaic, the language used to discuss Jewish Law and Kabbalah. With each word he spits in the tongue of ancient Babylon, Y-Love breathes new life into hip-hop, one beat at a time.

Y-Love has performed with these fine folks, Lou Reed, DJ Spooky, Hadag Nachash, Matisyahu, & Steinski at venues ranging from Princeton to Irving Plaza.

The page has a free track you can listen to. Other spots for more Y-Lovin’ include his MySpace page and the Web site of his DJ Handler. Both of them are flying to Israel as we speak to attend and perform at the ROI120 Summit. I saw Y-Love perform at the last Sephardic Music Festival and he was VERY cool!

Long story short – Lollapalooza is running a contest. If enough people vote for Y-Love, he and his crew may be able to play at the show – which means great exposure and publicity. Aramaic raps are what America needs today! So… vote NOW! It takes like 2 minutes and this round ends June 30th! So… do it now, tell your friends!

Good luck guys, see ya in Jerusalem.

The Poles are getting worried that people will forget who set up death camps in their country:

The United Nations has accepted Poland’s request to rename the Auschwitz death camp on its list of World Heritage sites to make clear it was run by Germans not Poles, the Polish government announced on Wednesday.

Auschwitz and the linked Birkenau camp in Poland would be known as “Auschwitz-Birkenau Nazi German Concentration and Death Camp”, Culture Minister Kazimierz Ujazdowski told a news conference in Warsaw.

But a spokesman for the Paris-based UN education and culture arm UNESCO said he could not confirm the news. Last year, Poland announced prematurely that the change had been made.

“UNESCO has made a decision as a result of Poland’s request to change the name of Auschwitz Birkenau to reflect the historical truth,” Mr. Ujazdowski said, with the Israeli ambassador at his side. “This is a victory for truth.”

More than a million Jews from across Europe were killed by the Nazis in Auschwitz and Birkenau in occupied Poland during the Second World War. Many Poles worry that the world is forgetting the camps were set up by the Germans.

Warsaw points to references to “Polish gas chambers” or the “Polish concentration camps” in world media as evidence Poles are wrongly portrayed as collaborators with the Nazis in killing Jews.

Last year, Poland formally asked UNESCO to change the camp’s name. Jewish organizations and Israel backed the plan after initial reservations. UNESCO’s World Heritage Committee has been meeting in New Zealand.

Source: The Globe and Mail.

I guess a literal translation of this band’s name would be The Church of the Intellect. Less literal would be Church of Wisdom. I’m willing to hear out other opinions.

Anyway, I have no clue what this video is about. I think it’s about a clown who becomes bitter, gives up clowning and takes up smoking. Then he’s really pissed at the world until a young girl gives him a red balloon and sunglasses-wearing band members show up and disgustedly walk away, making the clown realize that life is one big piece of drudgery and he’d better get back to work. At least the music is decent.

Here’s a live performance of the band’s.

Kosha Dillz @ LA Knitting Factory TONIGHT!
What else you have going on?

Kosha is “an Israeli-American hip hop artist promoting Jewish spirituality concepts amongst Torah/kabbalistic references and Pro-Israel messages with a street savvy swagger to back it up.” He speaks Spanish too.

At The Knitting Factory
7201 Hollywood blvd…
9 pm 9 30 latest….

And just in case you are not convinced by the title…read here.

From the Jerusalem Post:

MK Yitzhak Levy (NU/NRP) [ed. - these are the "religious" Zionists including a large representation of the settler population] announced on Wednesday morning that he was prepared to support the release of his daughter’s killers in return for kidnapped IDF soldier Cpl. Gilad Schalit.

Levy – whose daughter, Ayelet Hashahar Levy, was killed by a car bomb in Jerusalem in November 2000 – sent a letter to Prime Minister Ehud Olmert, calling to include the perpetrators of the attack in a prisoner swap deal, on the condition that they then be banished from Israel.

In an interview with Army Radio, Levy said that “there is only one way in which a prisoner release would be reasonable, and that is [by] sending them outside of the state of Israel and [the PA territories] and keeping them in another country.”

He added that he was also prepared to release other prisoners with blood on their hands as part of a prisoner exchange, stressing that “Gilad’s return home is more important than one prisoner or another sitting in jail.”

“We have to do everything [possible] to return our children home, and this includes releasing security prisoners,” he said. “It’s possible to release prisoners with blood on their hands, on the condition that they do not return to Gaza or the West Bank. This is a security requirement, as well as a national one.”

I doubt that this idea that they would be released but sent elsewhere would be agreeable to Hamas, but unfortunately from a historical perpective, he’s right that many released terrorists return to terror activities. His letter to Olmert, however, bring us a reminder that in these hostage exchanges for Israeli prisoners, the families of the terrorists’ victims pay a second time for the original crime. Not only did they lose or watch a loved one suffer, but then they have to watch as the person who committed the crime is released long before serving out his or her sentence. It is a difficult and perhaps even unethical calculation that many Israeli governments have made, especially when considering that Israel has proof that many of these released individuals strike Israel again.

Another interesting issue is that Palestinians and Lebanese think so little of showing Israel and the world that THEY believe that one Israeli is worth a couple of hundred of them. With Hizbullah, they even equated dead Israelis with large numbers of prisoners. Consider the implication of Hamas asking for a single Palestinian prisoner in Israel to be released in exchange for Shalit’s freedom. I believe that this would make a statement far stronger than the one they establish by seeking hundreds of their men and women for one young Israeli soldier.

In any case, what Yitzhak Levi is doing by opening the door to releasing his daughter’s murderers for Shalit, is giving them ethical cover in what is an extraordinarily difficult choice that many Israeli governments have had to face. There are many Israeli victims’ families who oppose such exchanges and sometimes they win the day. I am sure, however, that Noam Shalit, Gilad’s father, is grateful to Levi for opening another crack in the door to have his son finally released in an exchange.

From Jerusalem Post:

At the urging of Channel 10 news, deposed PA prime minister Ismail Haniyeh’s deputy, Ahmed Youssef, called Noam Schalit, father of kidnapped soldier Gilad, on Tuesday.

“I hope you are at least satisfied now that you have heard your son’s voice,” Youssef told Schalit.

Schalit appeared overcome, and said he preferred to speak with Youssef off-camera. Youssef offered him his phone number, and told Schalit he could call him “any time.”

Youssef told Channel 10 that he had been the one to decide to release the tape of Gilad speaking.

“We [in Hamas] received many requests… many people said how important it was to show [Gilad's] family some proof he was living,” he said.

“I personally got phone calls from Jewish representatives from the US and Israel. They asked Hamas to provide some sign of life – a letter or a video. They said Israel would be willing to give [us] something in return.”

And earlier:

Abducted Israel Defense Forces soldier Gilad Shalit is still suffering from wounds sustained when he was kidnapped, and is being held in conditions that are not suitable for proper treatment, a senior Hamas official said Tuesday.

Osama al-Mezeini, who represented Hamas in the Egyptian-mediated talks on Shalit’s release, said the soldier suffered several wounds during the abduction that have yet to heal.

In an interview with Islamic Jihad’s Al-Quds Radio, al-Mezeini added that the sanitary conditions at the isolated location in which Shalit is being held.

In an audio tape released by Hamas on Monday, the abducted soldier said his health was deteriorating, and that he would need to be hospitalized for a long period of time.

The manner in which Shalit has been held as a hostage is cruel beyond measure, to him and to his family. The psychological games Hamas is playing are also manipulative and disgusting but at least we now have assurances that Shalit is alive.

Shalit’s being held hostage holds all of Israel hostage because he is the son of every Israeli who has served in the IDF or whose children serve. There is also no doubt that it is incompetence on the part of the IDF (they had specific intelligence about the attack beforehand) that led to his kidnapping, which makes the state’s obligation to have him released even greater than it would be otherwise. It is partially for this reason that Hamas cynically brings up the exchange Israel made a number of years ago with Hizbullah for an Israeli captive, Elhanan Tannenbaum, who was subsequently proven to have been involved with an intended drug deal. Surely, if a drug dealer deserved an exchange, so does Shalit. The problem is that the exchange cannot be at any price and having such an exchange take place now would bolster Hamas at a time when it has over-reached severely and is seeking to repair the damage. I hate to say it but this may not be most prudent time to exchange prisoners for Shalit. On the other hand, Israel should prepare for an exchange in the near future.

As one would expect from the Jolie-Pitts, “A Mighty Heart” is mostly NOT about the Al-Qaeda murder of Daniel Pearl, killed in cold blood specifically because he was a Jew. In fact, the movie minimizes that, instead repeatedly blaming America for its treatment of Guantanamo Bay prisoners as the reason Pearl was cut into the ten pieces like a slaughtered chicken, the state in which his body was found. (That’s no surprise, given that the Jolie-Pitts hired as “A Mighty Heart’s” director, Michael Winterbottom, who also directed the propaganda fake-umentary, “The Road to Guantanamo.”) In “A Mighty Heart,” we see no depiction at all of Pearl’s captivity or even kidnapping by Qaeda thugs, but for a few re-enactments of tiny parts of the famous Pearl video.

Most shocking, we get an onscreen repeat of the oft-told Muslim myth that 4,000 Jews didn’t show up for work at the World Trade Center on 9/11, because the Jews planned the attacks. The movie provides no refutation of this myth or any indication that it is invalid.

Even Variety, that usually stays out of the fray, came away with a sense that all was not right in this film:

Controversy continued to dog “A Mighty Heart” on the eve of its bigscreen bow, as pic drew fire over a screening designed to promote religious tolerance.

Paramount Vantage initiated the Thursday evening event — a screening followed by a panel discussion at the Sherry Lansing theater — soliciting input from Muslim, Christian and Jewish orgs. The Council on American-Islamic Relations (CAIR) [anti-Israel-Ed.] and Progressive Christians Uniting (PCU) [anti-Israel-Ed.] ended up co-sponsoring with the specialty label; Plan B co-producer Dede Gardner and Rabbi Haim Dov Beliak were skedded to appear on the panel along with reps of CAIR and PCU. Café Intifada [anti-Israel-Ed.], Friends of Pakistan, USA and Muslim Public Affairs Council [anti-Israel-Ed.]also lent their support to the event.

However, a Jewish activist decried the leanings of several of the participants, likening CAIR’s involvement to “David Duke co-sponsoring ‘Schindler’s List.’”

“The only reason they like this film is because it’s about a dead Jew,” said Allyson Rowen-Taylor, who has been involved in orgs such as the American Jewish Congress and Stand With Us.

Clearly they wanted to show that many people helped find Daniel Pearl. And also many people wanted and wished him killed. The film doesn’t talk about that apparently. If you have seen it – sound off below.

*NEW BONUS FOOTAGE BELOW*

Last night was the first show of missFlag’s mini-tour of Israel. A packed house assembled at the Yellow Submarine in East Talpiot to hear what turned out to be a most excellent show. The boys were in fine form and the venue was a perfect match for the band’s intimate brand of emo-rock punctuated by fine musicianship, Assaf Kraus keeping the beat and Ohad Eliyon’s breathy vocals. A little birdie told me that they may perform again on July 3rd in Jerusalem at Shlomzi in a show that coincides with ROI120, but don’t tell anyone.

The highlight of the evening for me, and by highlight I mean period of absolute mortification, was when the band dedicated their cover of Britney Spears’ Toxic to me. I mean, the gesture was sweet and all, but what am I supposed to think when Israel’s leading indie band, poised on the cusp of stardom, sings the following lyrics in honor of me: “With the taste of your lips I’m on a ride, You’re toxic I’m slippin’ under, With the taste of the poison paradise, I’m addicted to you, don’t you know that you’re toxic? And I love what you do, don’t you know that you’re toxic?” So much for my campaign to promote myself as a good, nice, sweet, dependable guy. Now I’m told a guy like me should wear a warning. Thanks guys. I love you too.

The after party was fun as well, and we were joined by the usual suspects including Lori, Esther and Lindsay of Livnot. Fun times, fun times. I really am truly sorry that you all couldn’t be there. This has nothing to do with Zionism and everything to do with what an excellent time we had. Why aren’t you here?? Seriously. Quit your job, hop on a plane, look me up and let’s all just enjoy the fabulousness that is Jerusalem in the summer. Fuck politics, Gaza, Hezballah, rioting Haredim, the shidduch crisis, cold sores, Yoni Shimmel’s bakery, the World Jewish Congress, Barack Obama, cellulite, 9-11 conspiracy theories, your goofy uncle, Nicolas Sarkozy, the Renewal Movement, Heeb magazine – fuck all that.

Let’s party. Oh… and happy birthday Leah Stern!

Here’s the bonus footage I was talking about – it’s missFlag performing a cover of True Colors by Cyndi Lauper.

Just so you know, the band also performs original music, all in English. You can hear it on their Web site or simply search for “missflag” on youtube.

Do you know where there is a source for Baseball in the Torah? It’s in the very first sentence of Breishis/Genesis: In the big inning….

The first ever professional baseball league in Israeli history got off to start this weekend with nearly 4000 fans watching the Petach Tikva Pioneers get clobbered by the Modi’in Miracles.
Albeit quite corny names, the baseball was real enough.

The Israel Baseball League has six teams, made up of players from around the world.

Perhaps my favorite footnote to this: no one had created a lexicon for baseball in Hebrew for the announcers to use. There is no way to say the common expressions that make baseball, well, baseball. Not yet.

Puzzled broadcasters calling the first professional baseball game in Israeli history struggled with rendering baseball lingo into the holy tongue of Hebrew.

After a valiant effort at translating some of the terms, they gave up _ lacing their broadcast with Hebrew-accented versions of ball, strike, out, majors, pitcher and base hit….

“How do you say ’home plate?’” asked one of the announcers on the cable sports channel, which carried the game live. No one came up with an answer.

Will Israelis tune in for the slow paced game of baseball? The league is hoping for a miracle, maybe even praying for one.

Pictured: Andre Sternberg, a native of Berkeley, California, who recorded the first win in IBL history.

Roots in love on Shderot Neviim in Tel Aviv.

Shabbat shalom!!

(photo is by Naama)

I know, we’ve covered this already. But then I saw this video and it brought home just how ridiculous this is. It never fails to surprise me that Israel is such a blend of coarseness and sophistication. This falls in the former category.

So much jewsy news today.

Republicans like contraception more than Israel. (But feel compelled to tell AIPAC they still want to be friends.)

Ban Ki-moon brings some back-bone to the UN calling the Human Wrongs Council a bunch of bullies.

Pelosi can return for vacation to Damascus on our tax-bill.

Israel is sending messages to Iran, the Hallmark F-16 variety.

Henry Wexler is calling the EU on the mat for being nice to Nasrallah.

University of California forced to change move-in days that conflict with Jewish HolyDays. This year it’s on Yom Kippur.

And last but not least, Olmert hands over 400,000,000 USD Abbas so he can buy more guns to let fall into the hands of Hamas when they take over the West Bank.

Ron Paul and Dennis Kucinich were the only members of congress to vote against a call to charge Ahmadinajad with violating the 1948 Genocide Convention.

The U.S. House of Representatives urged the U.N. Security Council to charge Iran’s president under genocide conventions.

The non-binding resolution, initiated by Reps. Mark Kirk (R-Ill.) and Steve Rothman (D-N.J.), passed Wednesday by 411-2. It cites an Oct. 27 speech in which Mahmoud Ahmadinejad allegedly called for Israel to be “wiped off the map” in its call for the Security Council to charge him under its 1948 convention for the prevention of genocide.

Rep. Dennis Kucinich (D-Ohio) attempted to have read into the record alternate translations of Ahmadinejad’s remarks that suggest the Iranian leader was calling Israel to come to an end through democratic means, and not through violence.

The two Representatives who voted against the resolution were Ron Paul (R-TX) and Dennis Kucinich (D-OH), both running for President who doubted the translation of Ahmadinejad’s comments. Kucinich cited faulty information leading up to the Iraq War as grounds for concern about the accuracy of Ahmadinejad’s comments. In other words, Kucinech and Paul thinks that this is all part of a new “war with Iran” propaganda.

Rep. Rothman asserted that Ahmadinejad had expressed the desire to “wipe Israel off the map” in an October 2005 speech and had made subsequent comments of a similar nature. Representative Ileana Ros-Lehtinen (R-FL), expressing her support for the bill, stated: “Let us be clear, [Ahmadinejad] is calling for the genocide of Jews.”

Under the 1948 Genocide Convention, “direct and public incitement to commit genocide” is illegal.

Michael Rubin writes in the National Review online that revisionists and apologists have tried to soften the wording of the famous call to”Wipe Israel off the map.” He points out that Juan Cole wrote:

So, I have a suggestion for my readers. Every time you see a newspaper article that alleges that Ahmadinejad said that Israel should be wiped off the face of the map, please write the editor. Say that this idiom does not exist in Persian, and that what Ahmadinejad actually said was, “This occupation regime over Jerusalem must vanish from the page of time.” And you can cite me.

Well, the real quote is there for the taking on an official Iranian News site:

Ahmadinejad: Israel must be wiped off the map
01:34:13 È.Ù
Tehran, Oct 26 – Iran’s President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad on Wednesday called for Israel to be “wiped off the map”.

“The establishment of the Zionist regime was a move by the world oppressor against the Islamic world,” the President told a conference in Tehran entitled ‘the world without Zionism’.

“The skirmishes in the occupied land are part of a war of destiny. The outcome of hundreds of years of war will be defined in Palestinian land,” he said.

“As the Imam said, Israel must be wiped off the map,” said Ahmadinejad, referring to the late founder of the Islamic Republic of Iran, Imam Khomeini.

Does not leave much room for “interpretation” or misunderstanding.

So Ron Paul, Dennis Kucinech – are your coffers so empty that you hope to fill them with some Iranian Oil profits? Not that anyone is going to vote for these two candidates for President—but they should get voted out of Congress for their blatant tuches-kissing to of all dictators, the one that wants Israel gone.

Juan Cole— we always knew which team you played for, so it is no surprise to see that YET AGAIN your credibility as a so-called scholar of the region has been cast into great doubt. Perhaps you and Finkelstein can get jobs in Tehran?

Woke up this morning after spending most of the night in anticipation of my first standup for Israel Television. Today I would cover the much anticipated Gay Pride parade. I jumped into the TV van, script in hand, ready and waiting for whatever Jerusalem would throw at me today. After what seemed like 25 police road blocks and having to argue to gain entry to King David street, I finally reached my destination. With moments to the broadcast and the parade about to begin, I stood amongst 7000 security officials, took a deep breath and prayed to God that the words would come to me.

I took a quick glance over my shoulder only to see thousands of rainbow clad parade participants getting ready to march. “We’re rolling!” and with that I began to speak: “I’m standing here on King David street where the Jerusalem Gay Pride parade you see behind me is about to begin. There is a massive security presence here with some 7000 Police and border guards on patrol. Officers here have been preparing for a wide variety of scenarios ranging from stabbing attempts to terrorist attacks with multiple casualties. Organizers were hoping for a longer, more central parade route, but they will only march several hundred yards along this street where I’m standing, down to Liberty Bell Park. About 5,000 people are expected to attend in a demonstration of Democracy in action…”

After a couple of takes with the parade marchers advancing towards me – mission accomplished! I celebrated my first real standup along side the participants’ accomplishment of finally being able to march in Jerusalem. Jerusalem is a city where every day brings a new opportunity to feel free and alive, whether its proving yourself as a journalist or being able to be proud of who you are. Today was an historical day both for me and for the thousands of gay and lesbian citizens in the city we all call home.

There isn’t conclusive evidence at this time but the timing seems awfully suspicious. It appears that just prior to the gay pride parade which was held in Jerusalem with relatively few incidents, a number of fires were set in forests surrounding Jerusalem. A couple of these, “Eshtaol forest, west of Jerusalem, and another fire near Beit Shemesh,” are still not under control.

Also, “City resident Gil Shiloh said that he noticed four fires near the Valley of the Cross, in central Jerusalem, and heard people praying in the background.”

Criminal idiots.

I should note that prior to this parade, while voicing strong opposition to the parade itself, a number of prominent rabbis publicly and responsibly requested that the ultra-Orthodox public refrain from taking any violent steps in their protests against the parade. Despite this possible arson and one guy who was caught with a small pipe bomb, for the most part it seems they were heeded and the protesters expressed their opposition without violence. This makes sense since a bunch of colorful balloons should make people happy, not angry.

Mavoi Satum, an organization that assists Agunot and Mesuravot Get, sponsored a March 2007 film festival on the subject of women and religion. Now they’re getting into fashion, with a show specifically designed to call attention to the plight of the agunah…

The event, “K’Asurot,” (rough translation by this American writer is “As Prisoners”) will be tomorrow, Friday June 22 at 10:30 am at the Dan Panorama in Tel Aviv. Tickets are between 150-200 NIS and all proceeds go to support agunot and women who have been refused religious divorces (get).

Mavoi Satum’s website describes their dual approach:

We have identified that in order to make a real difference, we must concentrate on both changing the lives of today’s Agunot and at the same time, ensure that measures be taken to eliminate the problem of the Agunah from our society altogether.

Mavoi Satum’s hope is that events like this will raise awareness and force the hand of the political and religious authorities to take measures that will solve this problem for the world’s agunot.

For tickets, call 052-261-6149.

Jerusalem-based band missFlag is set to perform in a mini tour that will take them to Jerusalem, Tel Aviv, Be’er Sheva and Haifa. You may remember them from their set at Jewlicious at the Beach 3.0, or maybe you caught them when they subsequently toured across the US. Or maybe you have no idea who they are and this is an opportunity for you to find out. Made up entirely of native Israelis, missFlag performs exclusively in English and are working hard to promote themselves outside the confines of the Holy Land. One of their major motivations in this respect is their desire to promote an image of Israelis and Jerusalem that reflects reality – one that’s not all wars and conflict, but mostly fun and good times mixed with a fervent desire for love and peace.

To that end, those of you attending ROI120 will be able to interact with Assaf Krause, the drummer of the band, who is also a participant in the content track.

But whatever… let’s talk about the music – they’ve been compared to Coldplay. I know that in terms of in depth musical analysis that’s kind of weak. But I’ve seen them live and they are most excellent. Don’t take my word for it though, check out selected missFlag tracks on theirMySpace page, and if you’re in Israel, see them live at the following:

Jun 23, 2007, 10:00 PM, The Yellow Submarine, 13 Harehavim st. Jerusalem
Jun 26, 2007, 10:00 PM, Tmuna Theater, 8 Shontsino st. Tel Aviv
Jun 30, 2007, 9:00 PM, Baraka, Beer Sheva
Jul 7, 2007, 9:00 PM, The Beat, Haifa

Still not convinced to go? Well, lets have a Battle Royale then! First up is UK music producer and DJ Mark Ronson armed with a full band including horn section, a rapper and a singer. Next up is Ohad from missFlag armed only with an acoustic guitar. Both cover Britney Spears seminal hit, Toxic, about destructive love and NOT shaved nether regions.

Which is better? Well, they’re both pretty good but only one will be playing in Israel. I’ll be at the Jerusalem missFlag show along with beautiful Jerusalemites and ROIers in town early . Pop by, say hi and lets have a beer! Rock on!

The wicked shall be judged, and those who were righteous before God shall be glorified. The final judgment is upon us and those who are evil shall be consigned to eternal torment in the fires of Gehenom. Given all the turmoil associated with the apocalypse, any signs of its pending arrival are of concern to me since Gehenom, or the Ben-Hinnom Valley commonly understood as Jewish hell, is right around the corner from where I live. When the shit hits the fan, it’ll be in my back yard – frankly, it scares the bejeezus out of me and I want to prepare.

Well, looks like I had better start repenting and stocking up on water, hazmat suits and iodine pills because the beast is amongst us and it’s name is… Celine Dion. How else does one explain the abomination below – Dion singing a cover of AC/DC’s You Shook Me All Night Long?

As it was written in the Book of Jeremiah 19:2-3:

19:2. And you shall go out to the Ben-Hinnom Valley which is at the entrance of the Harsith Gate, and you shall call there the words that I will speak to you. 19:3. And you shall say; Hearken to the word of the Lord, O kings of Judah and inhabitants of Jerusalem; so said the Lord of Hosts, the God of Israel; Behold I am bringing evil upon this place, which whoever hears, his ears will tingle.

וְיָצָאתָ אֶל-גֵּיא בֶן-הִנֹּם אֲשֶׁר פֶּתַח שַׁעַר החרסות (הַחַרְסִית) וְקָרָאתָ שָּׁם אֶת-הַדְּבָרִים אֲשֶׁר-אֲדַבֵּר אֵלֶיךָ: וְאָמַרְתָּ שִׁמְעוּ דְבַר-ה’ מַלְכֵי יְהוּדָה וְיֹשְׁבֵי יְרוּשָׁלִָם כֹּה-אָמַר ה’ צְבָאוֹת אֱלֹהֵי יִשְׂרָאֵל הִנְנִי מֵבִיא רָעָה עַל-הַמָּקוֹם הַזֶּה אֲשֶׁר כָּל-שֹׁמְעָהּ, תִּצַּלְנָה אָזְנָיו

Yeah. The blood dripping from my ear drums does kinda make me tingle. My neshama hurts. Bad. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

My friend Avi Liberman is a standup comic in Los Angeles. He’s actually doing fairly well out there, hosting Jewish comedy events at Jewish organizations and “regular venues” in New York City, Vegas and Los Angeles, of course. He hangs out with Elon Gold (most recently of the late Pam Anderson sitcom ‘Stacked’) and various other comics of note, members of the tribe and those outsiders who don’t have a shot at show business because they’re uncircumcised. (Just kidding, guys. Jewish comics need at least one of you to turn on the lights on Shabbat. Funniest person wins that role…)

Once a year, Avi acts as pied piper–or Moses, if you prefer–taking American comics on a pilgrimage to the Holy Land in order to entertain audiences and raise funds for the Crossroads Center in Jerusalem:

Proceeds from stand-up performances in Jerusalem, Tel Aviv, and Raanana by Liberman and three of his professional peers (including the subject of a stand-up documentary and a regular on The Office) directly benefit Anglo youth-at-risk in Jerusalem.

From the Crossroads site:

This year’s 8:30 p.m. comedy benefit schedule is as follows:

Tel Aviv @ the ZOA House on Sunday, June 24 (tickets: 03.695.9341)
Raanana @ Yad LaBanim on Tuesday, June 26 (tickets: 09.761.0549)
Jerusalem @ the Yellow Submarine on Wednesday, June 27 (tickets: 02.624.6265)

Doors open at 8:00 p.m. If you want a group discount, just round up a group (10+) and let us know. And pay attention, especially if you live in Raanana: The shows start at 8:30 p.m. (some of the tickets say “21:00 בשעה,” but in error). The shows start at 8:30 p.m. At 8:30 p.m. start the shows. The shows at 8:30 p.m. start.

I’m not sure, but I’m beginning to suspect that the event may start at 8:30pm.

Prices are not listed online, but I believe it’s about 80 shekel. Don’t quote me on it, though. But it is a benefit, so buy generously. Do it for the kids, man.

[Cross-posted at MyUrbanKvetch]

The Council has been reborn because the previous body, the Human Rights Commission, was so egregiously anti-Israel that it was embarrassing to the UN as an institution. It seems the new council is no less embarrassing. Of the following countries, only one, Canada, voted against a resolution two days ago to permanently

place[s] Israel automatically on the council’s agenda for debate while all other countries in the world are dealt with under an overall global subject heading. The second move calls for Israel’s activities in the Palestinian territories to be permanently reviewed until it withdraws from the West Bank.

On the same day, the Council, in its wisdom, determined to “terminate the mandates of the UN rapporteurs on the Governments of Cuba and Belarus.” Cuba and Belarus, according to the UN? A-okay. Israel? Permanent scrutiny. Which is the open and free democracy with a vibrant justice system and an ongoing military threat to its existence?

By the way, of these mandates which have rapporteurs, there is one whose mission is to investigate on an ongoing basis only Israeli violations of human rights laws in the “Palestinian territories.” His name is John Dugard (see Jewlicious link above) and Israel, rightly, ignores him. His next report will, by the nature of his mission, not include any pertinent information about the war crimes committed by Hamas in Gaza just now, because he has no mandate to investigate them. However, he will blame Israel for a variety of actions there, regardless of the cause or other ongoing issues.

The incredible part of this vote to place Israel under permanent scrutiny is that among the nations who voted in favor, we find some European states as well as others who one would think would act with less cynicism. Here is a list of the countries that are currently members of the Council and of these only Canada voted against:

Angola (2010) Bangladesh (2009) Azerbaijan (2009) Argentina (2007) Canada (2009) Cameroon (2009) China (2009) Bosnia and Herzegovina (2007) Brazil (2008) Finland (2007) Djibouti (2009) India (2007) Romania (2008) Cuba (2009) France (2008) Egypt (2010) Indonesia (2007) Russian Federation (2009) Ecuador (2007) Germany (2009) Gabon (2008) Japan (2008) Slovenia (2010) Guatemala (2008) Netherlands (2007) Ghana (2008) Jordan (2009) Ukraine (2008) Mexico (2009)Switzerland (2009) Madagascar (2010) Malaysia (2009) Peru (2008) United Kingdom (2008) Mali (2008) Pakistan (2008) Uruguay (2009) Mauritius (2009) Philippines (2007) Nigeria (2009) Qatar (2010) Senegal (2009) South Korea (2008) South Africa (2010) Saudi Arabia (2009) Zambia (2008) Sri Lanka (2008).

It really is shameful to watch this happen. Just as one example, China has displaced hundreds of thousands of Tibetans, is overtaking their country through the use of its resources and placement of native Chinese in positions of power and influence, and has entirely abused the Tibetans’ rights to religious freedom which is why the Dalai Lama lives in exile. There is no special rapporteur for China or Tibet. China is not under permanent scrutiny. Nobody at the UN is calling Tibet a territory and the only checks against China will be the reviews that all the states of the world including the many gross violators of rights on the Council itself will have to undergo regularly. Of course, they’ve gotten away with their misbehavior until now and fully expect to keep doing so.

Shame on Germany, Switzerland, the UK, France, Japan, Argentina, Romania, Netherlands, Uruguay, Mexico, Ukraine and South Korea for voting in favor of this biased regulation against Israel, a fellow democracy. I guess I expect no better from the other nations.

Update:

A UN statement [released today] said: “The Secretary-General [Ban Ki-moon] is disappointed at the council’s decision to single out only one specific regional item given the range and scope of allegations of human rights violations throughout the world.”

Admittedly, it’s not the same as saying, “Stop using Israel as your personal scapegoat, you hypocrites” but then again, he’s a diplomat.