I’m blogging from Detroit, where you can feel the ressesion as you drive down the street. Passing row after row of shopping centers with partial occupancy, homes in forclosure, abandonded projects, roads in neglect, population depletion – and that is in the suburbs.

Downtown is a horrific mess of hulking abandoned buildings, empty lots where homes and businesses once stood, and thousands of down and out people on the streets. Its like a movie about the Great Depression. Detroit is Ground Zero in the economic downturn, representing everything that has gone terribly wrong.

Thomas Friedman in the NY Times makes the argument that our own domestic insecurity is much more damaging than any perceived or real external enemy:

My fellow Americans: We are a country in debt and in decline — not terminal, not irreversible, but in decline. Our political system seems incapable of producing long-range answers to big problems or big opportunities. We are the ones who need a better-functioning democracy — more than the Iraqis and Afghans. We are the ones in need of nation-building. It is our political system that is not working.

I continue to be appalled at the gap between what is clearly going to be the next great global industry — renewable energy and clean power — and the inability of Congress and the administration to put in place the bold policies we need to ensure that America leads that industry….

We’re at a 34-year low. And digging out of this hole is what the next election has to be about and is going to be about — even if it is interrupted by a terrorist attack or an outbreak of war or peace in Iraq. We need nation-building at home, and we cannot wait another year to get started. Vote for the candidate who you think will do that best. Nothing else matters.

Some of the “bold policies” we need are enforcing laws to prevent corporate greed from running this country, mitigating the materialism that has decayed the American dream, and fixing an education system that cannot teach the majority of Americans the basics they need.

America – Detroit is the canary in the coal mine and we are in deep trouble.

Check out more pictures on Forgotten Detroit.

A concept so obvious, even a child can understand it?

Mcgill History Professor and ROI120 facilitator (2006 and 2007) Gil Troy’s latest book, Leading From The Center: Why Moderates Make The Best Presidents argues that historically, the most successful American Presidents had been what he likes to call “muscular moderates”: Presidents who succeeded not due to their bold political visions, but rather due to their moderation. The book is thick with detail as befits a work by a history professor and has certainly led me to reassess a few of my previously held beliefs – I mean Ronald Reagan? A moderate?? Apparently so according to Troy. Troy’s agenda, certainly as it relates to the upcoming Presidential elections, is to encourage centrist policies that seek to emphasize core American values while avoiding partisan divisiveness. Troy recently penned an opinion piece for the Jerusalem Post that advocated the same perspective for Israel, and while our ostensibly centrist party, Kadima, lies in tatters due to Olmert’s slide in popularity, Troy’s perspective remains compelling:

Israelis have long displayed national unity during times of war – and in pursuit of peace. Israel needs — and deserves — a leader who can summon that same sense of national unity and fraternity to help make the country thrive day-to-day, not just survive a crisis.

Certainly thought provoking. I know that I will now view the upcoming Presidential campaigns from this perspective – The candidate most successful at capturing the center will historically be the one with the more successful Presidency. Thus far it seems that both McCain and Obama have heeded this historical lesson. As for Israel?

Oy…

And aren’t Troy’s kids adorable??

It is not suprising that Guy Ritchie dumped the Kabbalah Center – what is suprising is that it took him so long to figure out that it was fleecing him with a fake religion. Inevitably, Madonna and Ritchie have to split because the cult business advises its adherents to dump spouses that don’t practice its voodoo. As the Sun writes:

GUY RITCHIE and MADONNA’s marriage has been thrown deeper into meltdown after he told her he’s quitting Kabbalah.

Madge has become increasingly involved with the mystical Jewish religion, but her film director husband is a step closer to hitting the road after losing his faith….

Now a source close to the couple has revealed: “Guy has turned his back on Kabbalah once and for all.

“He has gone hot and cold on the religion in the past, but now he’s given up on it altogether. It has always been her thing and is more a part of her life than ever. “

Notice they call it a religion. Anyway, Ritchie now can do the right thing and spill the beans. 20/20, Radar, BBC and others have uncovered the unseemly truth behind this imposter religious leader and his minions. [Wow that sentence might be tough enough to get a letter from their lawyers.] Ritchie had access to the highest echelons and must have some damning stuff. But then again he wants to see his kids again. They have three kids together and his dumping on her high-priest many harm him in divorce court.

So will the Madonna Ritchi Split endanger the Kabob center? Most likely no, but it does offer us another opportunity to remind everyone of this not-harmless brainwashing cult business lurking in our backyard.

That’s the final tally for voting over the prisoner exchange deal. Olmert and co. have been preparing Israelis for the strong possibility that Israel is getting bodies rather than living soldiers in return for a rather generous hand over (assuming ‘unspecified numbers’ is fairly large). The Guardian’s story is below. Let’s hope that the soldiers are alive (and pray for it if you are into that kind of thing).

Israel agreed today to swap a Lebanese prisoner for the bodies of two captured soldiers.

The decision, which was backed in the Israeli cabinet, is likely to prompt a prisoner exchange with Hizbullah within days under a deal mediated by Germany.

The Israeli prime minister, Ehud Olmert, announced for the first time today that the soldiers, Ehud Goldwasser and Eldad Regev, were dead.

“We know what happened to them,” Olmert told the cabinet, according to comments released by his office. “As far as we know, the soldiers Regev and Goldwasser are not alive.”

The soldiers were captured by Hizbullah in July 2006 in a cross-border raid that sparked a month-long war.

In return for their bodies, the cabinet agreed to release Samir Kantar, a Lebanese guerrilla imprisoned for nearly 30 years for an attack on a northern Israeli town.

Goldwasser’s father, Shlomo, said he was not surprised by the declaration, but wanted proof the soldiers were dead. “They were alive when they were kidnapped and no one has provided us with evidence to the contrary,” he said.

The Israeli cabinet debated the deal for nearly six hours before the vote. There was no immediate reaction from the soldiers’ families or Hezbollah.

In addition to the bodies, Israel will receive a report on a missing Israeli airman whose plane crashed in Lebanon in 1986, and body parts of other Israeli soldiers.

In addition to Kantar, Lebanon will also receive four imprisoned Hizbullah fighters, a dozen bodies, most of them Hizbullah militants, and an unspecified number of Palestinian prisoners.

Hizbullah had demanded the release of hundreds of Palestinian prisoners.

Critics have argued that swapping bodies for Kantar would offer militant groups an even greater incentive to capture soldiers and less of a reason to keep captives alive.

Israel is trying to win back a third soldier captured by Palestinian militants in a June 2006 cross-border raid from the Gaza Strip.

Unlike his comrades in Lebanon, the soldier has sent letters and an audio tape to his parents and is believed to be alive, though he has not been seen since his capture. The Red Cross has not been permitted to visit him.

The proposed deal with Hizbullah would require the approval of the militant group’s secretive, decision-making Shura Council. Germany has been trying to mediate a prisoner exchange since Israel’s war with Lebanon ended in August 2006.

Israeli media said the soldiers’ bodies would be sent to Germany and identified by Israel before Kantar is released. The identification process and swap are expected to take 10 to 14 days.

Like most of you, I wonder where the guy might be. I mean, we know he’s not here. We also know that he’s definitely somewhere (sometimes, Dave’s very presence makes a place “somewhere!”). So, not hearing from him by email and watching his posting on Jewlicious dwindle considerably (not that I’m one to talk these days), I began to worry about our representative in Jerusalem.

Fortunately, Dave, under the Jewlicious banner, has a Flickr account. It is linked automatically to our site where you will find it on the bottom right of your screen if you scroll a little. As a result, even without hearing a word from him in person, I am able to see just how much fun Dave is having. A lot.

This fine photo was captured by Lights2008 who also has an interesting Jerusalem section on his page.

Based on unreliable media reports, there may be an exchange for Israeli captive soldiers with Hizbullah some time soon. There is no right or wrong here, one could argue either side of this deal but it’s a coin flip as to whether it’s a good or bad deal. Let us hope, however, that they come back alive and the Israeli government stops toying with the stupid idea of calling them dead. Because then they will be if they’re not already.

The “cease fire” with Hamas lasted less than a day. Palestinians rockets came crashing down on Israel again. When Israel closed Gaza crossings as a response, Hamas told the media Israel was violating the cease fire. This proves that no good deed goes unpunished and Israel should refrain from cutting cease fire deals with terror organizations that don’t recognize it.

Olmert continues to survive. Barak continues to hang on by clawing to the wall from which he is about to slip and fall. Livni is making a gentle push for the top spot and Mofaz is making a crude one. Here in the US, in Forbes magazine, Mr. Forbes wrote that the reason for high oil prices is insecurity about whether Israel is going to attack the “murderous thugs” (his words) in Iran. This is untrue but sounds about as realistic as the other 1200 theories about $4/gallon gas. I hear it’s twice as much in Israel so Mofaz should publicly call for attacks on Iran more often if Mr. Forbes is right.

And like every shabbat for the past 2500-3000 years, Jews everywhere are taking some time to consider or to “keep” the seventh day of the week. Shabbat shalom.

We don’t have a sports editor, yet, but here it goes.

With some of the world’s greatest marathon runners saying they will not compete because of the pollution – the field is wide open. One of the most unusual runners that hopes to compete is Israeli marathon runner Haile Satayin. He is 48, Ethiopian, and Israeli. He finished 20th at the Athens Olympics four years ago.

Linda Gradstein from NPR reports has a great report which you can listen to:

Israeli marathon runner Haile Satayin will be one of the oldest athletes at the Beijing Olympics.

He immigrated to Israel from Ethiopia. While his passport says he’s 53, he says he’s only 48.

Most days, Satayin gets up around 4:30 a.m. and runs at least a half-marathon before it gets too hot. His favorite running spot is a forest on the edge of the town of Hadera in central Israel.

Watching Satayin run is a little like watching a cheetah — his loping strides seem effortless, and you don’t realize how fast he’s going. But one of his running partners, Dror Haziza, uses a different analogy.

Haziza says Satayin has a special style.

“He just flows. There’s no resistance at all. Sometimes I feel that I’m fighting to run, but with him there’s no fight,” he says. “It just comes naturally. When he runs with us, the whole group gets to a new level.”

He also lives in poverty along with more than 20 percent of Israel’s population.

Satayin lives with his wife and eight children in a small apartment in a rundown section of Hadera, populated mostly by Ethiopian immigrants. On the second floor of a four-story building, the apartment has three tiny bedrooms, a cramped living room and a kitchen. On a shelf above a bunk bed in one of the children’s rooms are dozens of trophies he won in competitions.

Perhaps he can lead a Birthright Marathon Runners Themed Trip each year to supplement his income?

We will keep an eye on Satayin.

Yesterday’s Jerusalem Pride Parade, organized by the Jerusalem Open House went off uneventfully. This is a good thing, given the stabbings that took place three years ago and the rioting in Meah Shearim last year. There was rioting this year but I think only one trash bin was set on fire whereas in the past you could count on several riots that involved the burning of at least half a dozen trash bins. The Parade organizers, who chose the theme of Ahavat Chinam (Unlimited Love) this year have done a great job defusing criticism by making the parade a relatively low key affair. They even began the parade with teffilat ha derech – the traditional prayer said when one is about to go on a journey and one of the speakers said a Dvar Torah about this week’s Torah portion. But what’s a pride parade without assless chaps? It’s hard to get excited when there are no assless chaps anywhere. I was however pleased by the spirit of inclusiveness and was not remotely made to feel bad about being heterosexual. Also the occasional lesbians making out was cool. Always cool!

Of course there was a counter demonstration where the police outnumbered the demonstrators by a 5 to 1 ratio. Yes. That smiling dude is holding up a noose. Oy. In any case, there were about 9 guys screaming at passing parade participants. They didn’t even have enough men for a minyan.

That having been said, I think I can guess where the 10th guy was that day.

Apparently I’m the only posting on Jewlicious this week but, I couldn;t hold back. for those of you who don’t know Frum Satire, check the first video below. For the rest, sign up for next months open mic July 23rd! For the rest, check out the brave folk who hit the Shemspeed Open Mic last night at Tea Lounge (Flickr link) The night was kicked off by Dave Rosner who used it as a way to prepare himself for tomorrow nights Kim Kardashian roast. Needles to say there were a lot of tooches jokes. It was really amazing to see rabbi types on the mic along with hipster yids and a crowd that was eager to hear the mix. The highlights included Frum Satire’s rant of weddings, since he had just gotten back from one. He then followed it up by talking about Shomer Negia and the different types, such as, the “Shomer Negia till opportunity” and “fictional Shomer Negia”. That part of the rant was by special request from the ladies (Tahlia ‘Matisyahu’ Miller & Yocheved Sudof) who are directing, “Can’t Touch This”, a documentary about Shomer Negia. After Frum Satire finished his hilarious rant, Crown Heights underground musical duet, Mordechai (an older Israeli Chabadnik) and Levi (a seasoned Austin, TX guitarist) took the stage to perform a sort of Shalom Chanoch meets Radiohead set, joined by Erez Safar on the guitar. Y-Love and Dov of Blue Fringe stopped by to perform an acoustic version of their “Eicha” song which was really beautiful. The night ended off like a superstar rock concert with Steven Baggs who was not allowed to stop performing. The crowd loved it. He’s a syrian Jew who Nina somehow stumbled upon on myspace and the dude is platinum!
To sign up for next months open mic which will be hosted by Frum Satire and co-sponosred by Zeek and Jewlicious along with the host Shemspeed, email openmic@shemspeed.com . It all goes down again Wednesday July 23rd at 7:30pm.

Frum Satire video

Mordechai & Levi Video

Open Mic gals photo

CHECK THE REST OF THE PHOTOS HERE

I still have not seen Zohan, my sister tells me its hilarious and I need to see it, but then follows that up with an, “well, I think its hilarious….you will either love it or hate it”. Thats a very mixed endorsement and with ticket prices at 22 bucks if you bring a date….I’m just not sure I want to see a movie I have a 50% chance of hating. I was going to see it in Israel, cigarette breaks and all, but the peoples with me wanted to hit up Ben Yehuda and ironically enough get food which included a side of hummus. Well, to hold me over, I keep watching this old school clip which has Adam Sandler featured as a cheesy Israeli, but its so subtle that in no way is it a foreshadowing of his later feature film exploit of the same aesthetic. ok, lets disco. (scroll down to see clip below) lehitraot!

JULY 1st – ONE TIME ONLY FULL BAND CLUB SHOW!
MOSH BEN ARI / Electro Morroco / Y-Love / Diwon / Hassan Hakmoun / Fabian Alsultany
@ MUSIC HALL
Get your tickets now before they sell out – http://www.ticketmaster.com/event/000040A7CD876C04
18+ Doors 8pm / Show 9pm – $30 advance / $35 day of show
all info at www.musichallofwilliamsburg.com

Mosh Ben Ari, Y-Love and Diwon will also be performing Summer Stage this coming sunday at 3pm – www.summerstage.org/index1.aspx?BD=20514

FREE REMIX!!!
Mosh Ben Ari – Jah is One – Diwon Remix

INFO ON MOSH BEN ARI
Mosh Ben Ari was born in Israel in 1970. He comes from a Yemenite and Iraqi background. He first discovered music as a child through the traditional Jewish and Ethnic chants that were part of his everyday life. He started playing music at the age of 16 and since he has studied music in many countries like India, The Sahara and Sinai. He plays various string instruments such as Acoustic & Classic Guitar, Indian Sarod, Persian Tar, Turkish Jumbush, Moroccan Ginberi and Bass. In 1997 he founded, with a few friends, the world music ensemble “Sheva” (www.sheva.net) who have released 4 albums and continue to tour the world doing dozens of shows in the most prestigious festivals & events. In 2001 Mosh’s debut solo album ‘Ad Elay’ came out. In 2004, Mosh’s second album ‘Derech’ (A Way) came out and established him as one of Israel’s foremost singers/songwriters and performers. This album quickly became “Gold”. In 2006, Mosh’s third album “Massa Umatan” (Go giving) was released and is a great success. All of the albums were produced by ‘Globalev World Music – Israel. Mosh’s music & performance is a celebration of groove & spirit blending rock, soul, reggae & world music all together with his rich unique voice.

all info at http://www.shemspeed.com

Last night’s episode of “Weeds” featured a noticeable absence of song (and cheer) at the episode’s opening. So glaring was it that the opening shot simply showed a highway, the Mexican border, and two signs with the words “Weeds” and “Creator: Jenji Kohan” and jumped to Mary Louise Parker attempting to use bubbe’s vibrator as a hair dryer. The latter was more awkward funny than real funny.

Am I excited that Weeds is back for another season? Of course! Do I like the current storyline of Nancy, her brother-in-law, Andy, and her kids on the lam hiding out with Albert Brooks? Damn straight! More opportunity to hear the word “schlimazel” outside the context of 80s sitcoms. Ok, so I stole that line. But I also miss the entire cast together and want some promise that their current non-Agrestic lives will be colliding in the near future with the people and storylines left behind, and most crucially the Nancy-Celia storyline.

Last night’s “Lady is a Charm” episode gave viewers a twist of hope in this department.

Elizabeth Perkins hinted that Nancy and Celia will be reunited and it only makes sense since Celia is currently taking the fall for Nancy’s booming pot business and it’s only a matter of time before she’s sprung free. To boot, Celia’s loverboy detective visited her at the end of last night’s episode and revealed an incriminating photo of Nancy and her drugpin boss, Guillermo, leaving us with the words, “I’m starting to believe you.”

While this season struggles to find its identity, I’m left with the disturbing thought that Showtime might try to make some sort of web contest to find the next theme song for Weeds. Hell, it might even become the next big reality TV show competition. In the meantime, however, crystal balls aside, it appears that more Yiddish vocabulary is in our immediate future and it’s fairly safe to say, Nancy will be assuming more drug running activities both north and south of the border.

There are women that dream of one day having their weddings, marrying their respective Prince/ss Charming, and running away to his/her castle. And then there are the rest of us who don’t have harbor those kinds of dreams and are for the most part, consumed with the desire to avoid either the planning of that event or the actual event, at all costs. I fall in the “just get me to the alter and don’t you dare bother me with the details” category.

Most of the people who fall into my category either have husbands who might be event planners, big families who would gladly take over the planning piece, plans to elope, and/or tons of money to pay someone else to worry about it.

As luck would have it, I don’t have any of the above so I’m a bit stuck trying to sort out why I’m going through all this. My husband and I had a civil ceremony in Feb. 2007 so for all intents and purposes we feel very much married and in sync spiritually, physically, and mentally. On the other hand, it’s important to both of us for our kids (when we have them one day) to be born with a sense of legacy-to know that they are part of a long line of Jews and that things like family, tradition, and roots are important.

When it comes down to it, it’s also important for our parents. My mother passed away when I was 16 and I still hear her hammering away in my head about how important a Jewish wedding is. Not to mention my in-laws and brother-in-law traveling all the way from Israel – they deserve an event. And I know it’s big for my dad even though it’s not in his nature to say those kinds of things.

So now on top of being laid off and looking for work, I’m in the throes of planning a wedding when I’m not even sure where I want it to be (all i know is I don’t want to spend too much $$) and that it will be small, intimate gathering of immediate family and incredibly close friends. So if anyone knows Boston and might have a clue as to a venue for such an occasion that would be cheap-o, please let me know. Or for that matter, plan my wedding and tell me when to show up!

Yes, yes we have begun a board so that we could finally get away with calling Jews Japps! The cheesy part is that it stands for something (JEWISH ACTIVISTS, PERFORMERS & PROGRAMMERS actively involved in creating a community in which we can work together to help achieve individual and communal goals.) The un-cheesy thing is that it won’t be all photo ops and b.s. We really want to gather a group of creative artists and programming peoples to work on bettering this whole dog eat dog thang that is going on. Everybody Love Everyboday was the sign that rested above Will Ferrell’s head as he coached in Semi-Pro. The movie sucked, but the idea was great. We all got ways to help each other out, so if we concentrate on that, we will still gain, but it will be so much of a warmer feeling than constantly gringing on how to further your own career. too harsh? too perfect? Either way let us know if you want in by emailing info@shemspeed.com
first meeting is tonight. hit us up! OR search for “The JAPP Board” on Facebook groups.

p.s. for those of you not in NY, we are about to launch the online version which will be broken up into many sections and will serve as an incredible resource for both artists and those in search of them!
p.p.s. this is not only for ROI heads.

Inspired by Tamar Fox’s report on Jewcy.

As the Iowa Flooding recedes, Jews are helping:

* Chabad has been distributing sandwiches and food, helping build sand-bag walls and other relief work. They set up a website ChabadFoodRelief.org to collect donations for there flood relief efforts. In the capital city of Des Moines, hundreds of people converged on the Maccabee’s Deli Tuesday to make 5,000 sandwiches and stuff brown bags full of food for thousands of Iowa residents now living in emergency shelters.

* Iowa’s Jewish communities are holding up well, but they anticipate needing help in the near future. Synagogues in Mason City and Dubuque have taken on water, and will likely need money and supplies once the waters have receded and they can clean up. The Jewish Federation in Des Moines is accepting contributions to be distributed for general flood relief, wherever it may do the most good. You may send a check, earmarked “Flood Relief” to the Jewish Federation, 910 Polk Boulevard, Des Moines, IA, 50312.

* University of Iowa Hillel is talking about organizing a volunteer rebuilding trip in late summer when the waters have receded and damage has been assessed. If you’re interested in such a trip, contact the University of Iowa Hillel. The school suffered damage to at least twenty buildings – after school had finished for the year.

* A handful of companies contributed the food, including the kosher meat packer Agriprocessors, which provided some 1,000 pounds of meat. I was told they will be doing more for flood victims in an effort to improve their battered image – which is good news.

So did you miss the the recent ROI Summit? You know that annual gathering of 120 young Jewish innovators and leaders from around the world? Well have no fear! You can go to the ROI120 Web site and read various blog posts about what went down, and Haaretz even covered one of the technology showcases:

A communications overload brought down the internet connection on Tuesday at Jerusalem’s Hebrew Union College. The surge came from room 104, where the summit’s 20 computer fanatics were trying to simultaneously connect their laptops to the Web to demonstrate their online inventions. After finally connecting, the computer lovers pitched ideas on how to eclipse online anti-Semitic content, use Anglo blogs to have fun in Jerusalem, help organizations maintain a more professional-looking online presence, and use computer animation to get African-American rap singer and retired drug dealer 50 Cent to teach about Passover… The session was part of the Third Annual ROI Global Summit for Young Jewish Innovators – a week-long conference for 120 people from 28 countries deemed to be “engaged in projects with potential to change the face of the world,” as stated in the invitation.

The article featured projects by Harry Rubenstein and Jerusalemite.net, William Levin and his Web site Shabot6000, Ori Neidich who does Web consulting for small non-profits and Dr. Andre Oboler, an expert in combating online anti-Semitism who talked about Google search engine optimization and how it can be used to diminish the reach of hate sites on the Internet.

Check out the rest of the article at Haaretz.com.

Originally posted on Amaldo.com.

Remember your worst nightmare? The one involving you being discarded like yesterday’s trash and easily replaced? The one where you woke and realized that thankfully you weren’t dispensible or at the very least, it was all just a dream, but secretly questioning and doubting your abilities and cringing at your assessment of you self-worth?

Maybe these neurotic tendencies only creep up on me. It’s possible. As I was watching VH1 today, however, and seeing this new 20-year-old chanteuse from North London being hailed as the “new Amy Winehouse,” I had to sneak a listen to her. I also had to ask myself that why in an industry as vast as music, do we need to go around and recycle the same names. Winehouse was able to breathe new life into soul music and put it back on the map. She should be credited as such, in spite of all her drug-laden shenanigans. The girl’s got raw talent. Her predecessors are simply jumping on the over-crowded bandwagon.

And while the singer known as Adele (having your last name dropped from a label eliminates all those ugly pesky ethnic associations) might be more of a promising gamble in the professionalism dept. and she shares some things in common with Amy -notably they graduated from the same performing arts school and share a producer, Mark Ronson, Adele is no Amy, “chasing pavements” and all.

But you be the judge and listen and compare below.

First there was Taglit-Birthright Israel. You know the routine – a free 10-day trip to Israel anyone Jewish between the ages of 18-26 who hasn’t been yet. Then there is Masa, a program that helps young Jews to participate in long term (6 months – 1 year) programs in Israel by providing generous grants and subsidies towards their expenses. I know many people who came to Israel on Birthright, were enthralled, then returned on a long-term Masa sponsored program. Nice, right?

Well now Nefesh B’Nefesh has stepped in with more… NBN is the organization that helps encourage immigration to Israel from North America and the UK by providing immigrants with cash and absorption assistance above and beyond what they are already entitled to from the Israeli government.

What’s the “more” part you ask? It’s very simple actually. I felt kind of dumb wasting Yael Katzman’s time asking that very question. Yael is the Director of Communications & Media at NBN and patiently explained to me this no-brainer program they have going on… Here’s how it works: If you are an alumni of either Taglit-Birthright Israel or MASA and then decide to make aliyah to Israel via Nefesh B’Nefesh, they will give you enhanced grants and further assistance aimed at the predominantly young single people they hope will be attracted to this initiative. That means more cash and singles-related events as a reward for having gotten free stuff from either Birthright or MASA or BOTH!

Wow. How awesome is that?? I’m already here in Israel so while I can’t benefit directly, I am all in favor of any project that increases my dating pool. Uhm and uh… helps fulfill the Zionist dream of course. I meant to say that first. So to rephrase… Zionist dream, Herzl and then more babes. Yay! Thanks Nefesh B’Nefesh. For more info about this and other NBN projects, click here.

I don’t know about you, but the first section I read of the Sunday New York Times is the weddings section (aka Sunday Styles). Some people turn to Books, Sports, Op-Ed, or the front pages. Others go for the magazine. But I go for the most influential section: Weddings and Vows. And ever since I had a Summer share in the Hamptons (East Quogue) two decades ago, I have been mentally scoring each wedding using my “simcha index,” or as they say in the Five Towns of Long Island: Schlepping Nachos (or is that shepping nachas?)

Let me explain how this scoring works, and apply it to the past few weeks of NYT Wedding announcements.

A recent issue published 40 weddings, 10 of which were Jewish (25%). Last week had 28 weddings, 10 of which were Jewish (34%). Pesach weekend, remarkably there were no Jewish weddings, hehe, except for a reprise of a prior one, in which two Jews, one of whom is a professional clown and a graduate of clown college.

The scoring system is below, and I invite readers to add ideas for additional items for analysis. Cum laude graduates earn a point, as do yeshiva graduates. The children of rabbis and machars get points. Points are accumulated for each degree past the BA, and doctors and lawyers get special bonus points. Should a doctor marry a Hebrew School teacher, there is a special point; and should the bride’s or groom’s degrees be from ivy league universities, a point is gained.

For example, on April 13, The Times published six Jewish weddings out of 13 (nearly 50%). Amanda Fuchs wed Jeremy Miller in a DC wedding by Rabbi Namath (+1). The bride, who used to work for Senator Obama received a MPA from Harvard (+1 for Harvard, +1 for the MPA). The groom, an attorney and son of a doctor, graduated from Brown (+3). Their total score was 6. Stephanie Schwab, a former hand-held, classy pornography entrepreneur, married Adam Gersacov. Schwab, an MBA (+1), married a professional clown, flea circus manager, and graduate of both clown college and Penn (+2). A rabbi officiated for these active synagogue members (+2). Their total score was 5. One bride was the daughter of a TV reporter and a former major league baseball pitcher, one owns a B&B, and one groom owns several famous Manhattan restaurants. But all slightly underscored the wedding of Emily Friedman and Grant Mogan at Brooklyn’s Navy Yard. A rabbi officiated (+1) for these two attorneys (+2), one of whom graduated cum laude (+1) and the other summa cum laude (+2). The groom’s father is not only a doctor, but a gastroenterologist (+1). Their total score was 7.

On April 27, The Times published 22 weddings and celebrations. But since it was Pesach, there were no Jewish weddings, except, luckily, one belated announcement for the wedding of Stephanie Pottruck and Aaron Goldman. By default, they were that week’s highest scoring couple in the simcha index. Best friends since their days at Penn (+2), they were nearly arrested together during a college prank (-1). He graduated magna cum laude (+2). Both always dated other people, and remained friends. The bride, the daughter of the former CEO of a Fortune 500 company (no points, he ain’t no doctor), had nearly 400 at her Waldorf=Astoria wedding by Rabbi Eckstein (+2) Total score was 5. (The fact that she was a redhead was diluted by the groom’s wearing of sneakers at the chuppah)


During the weekend of May 25, right after Lag B’Omer, The Times published wedding announcements for an Assistant Secretary of State, Hindus, Moslems, Christians, Jews and others. In one wedding, an assistant to a Warner brothers producer wed the executive producer of Scrubs, and in another one, a Motown producer and daughter of a Hadassah biggie wed a Sony attorney. The Sunness-Bass wedding had two rabbis (+2). Bass is a Chicago MBA (+1), and he met his wife after being fixed up with her by his grandmother, who was friends with the bride’s grandmother in prewar Poland and Auschwitz (cool story +1). Total score was 4. The Salkin-Morris wedding scored a 6 since Morris had two ivy degrees, both with honors. The Biddle-Frankel wedding, both of whom are artists and met in a drawing class, used not only a rabbi, but a Storahtelling play by Amichai Lau-Lavie; while the Sunder-Tager wedding used a famous cantor (+2) and combined two Harvard cum laude grads (+5), one of which was a Fulbright fellow in Islamic Studies (+1). Total score was 8. Sadly, they were beaten out by Rosen-Kontorovich. They were married at the Sephardic synagogue in Cedarhurst. She is an honors, ivy league med student, and he is a honors ivy leaguer with multiple degrees. Plus did I mention that the groom plays clarinet for the Klez Dispensers in Princeton? Their total score was 10.

In my most recent scoring (June 15), post the Shavuot holiday, there were 40 weddings and simchas, and 11 were Jewish (27%). Among them were the Schoefeld-Wein union which scored an 11 from numerous medical related degrees and honors from Harvard and Yale (and her father’s a doctor!); and the Tobias-Altschuler nuptials, scoring an 8, from ivy degrees and a father who was the former national Chairman of the ADL and a mother who is a trustee of a Jewish museum. But my fave for the week, albeit a low scorer, was the union of two oboists, one for a Ohio orchestra, the other based in LA. I hope they make beautiful music together

SCORING SYSTEM:
Bride or Groom is a rabbi /score: 2
Parent of Bride/groom is a rabbi /score: 2
Couple married by relative who is a rabbi /score: 2
Parent of Bride/Groom is Jewish macher /score: 1
Bride/Groom is a Jewish macher /score: 1
Bride/groom is a Jewish Blogger /score: 2
Parent of Bride/Groom works for UJA /score: 1
Parent of Bride/Groom works for synagogue /score: 1
Bride or Groom is a Jewish educator /score: 2
Bride or Groom has Phd in Jewish studies /score: 2
Bride or Groom is descendant of famous Jew /score: 2
Minister/Imam participated in ceremony /score: -2
Couple met a Jewish event /score: 3
Couple met in college /score: 2
Jewish groom marries Asian bride /score: 1
Ivy league graduate /score: 2
Yeshiva graduate /score: 3
Groom over 10 yrs older than bride /score: -1
Bride/Groom previous marriage ended in divorce /score: -2
Bride/Groom previous 2 marriages ended in divorce /score: -3
Graduated Cum Laude /score: 1
Graduated Magna Cum Laude /score: 2
Graduated Summa Cum Laude /score: 3
Graduated with fellowship /score: 2
Met on Israel trip /score: 3
Intermarriage without conversion /score: -2
Married by celebrity rabbi /score: 2

Please help me by adding more scoring attributes. Thanks

If you answered yes well guess what? You’re not the only one. You know who else hates American Apparel? Well, apparently the nice folks over at NewsNet14. Just a little background for you, NewsNet14’s About Us section acts as a sort of manifesto that lets you know what these lovely folks are about:

Newsnet14 is an online resource for people of European descent around the world… The places we call home are no longer “our” nations. These people who decide our fate, these “elected officials” are put there not by you or me, but by Zionist media mongers… We must all realize is that Our Race is Our Nation. European Americans have more in common with a Swede living in Stockholm, or an Italian living in Venice, when it comes to morals, and culture than they do with the African American, or Mexican living next door.

And what about American Apparel?

The label ‘Made in USA’ may have meant something to Americans 60 years ago. America was a much different place then. We knew that when something was made in the US, that is was made by white Americans in an American factory, and by a company that had some interest in the community and well-being of our country… Fast forward to today. We still see many Americans and even some racial-thinking Americans stuck in the false belief that buying American-made goods will benefit us. One of the best examples of a modern company producing goods using the ‘Made in USA’ tag is American Apparel… American Apparel is a company with their factory based in Los Angeles. Their factory is disproportionately Hispanic and their legal status is very suspect. English classes are available there and immigrant workers are allowed to make free phone calls home during work. Would supporting this factory help us? … AA also was founded by the current CEO and President Dov Charney. Dov is a perverted Jew who has been applying the usual Jewish degenerate values into his company.

Usual Jewish degenerate values?? I dunno you Nazi bastards… I recall one particular 4th of July spent partying in East LA with muffti and a mess of Mexican AA employees and their families. Besides the fact that I met a number of cousins and brothers who had served with the US armed forces in Afghanistan and Iraq, I don’t think either of us had ever witnessed as exuberant a celebration of American independence anywhere else, ever – and the muffster and I get around! These Latinos were all property owners who earned their piece of the American dream by working damned hard. And when they party, they party with the whole family – including little kids (who tried to throw me in the pool). When you think about it, they were practically Republicans!

But enough about that. Finally the extreme right and extreme left have something they can agree on – unabashed and irrational hatred of American Apparel – a company that manufactures in the US, provides their employees with a living wage and great benefits, uses Organic cotton for 40% of their production, generates 30% of their electricity via solar energy, advocates for the reform of immigration law and is so successful that they just opened two new stores… in China!

Ironic much?

Originally posted on Amaldo.com.
Ilana Donna goes to visit the folks in Florida and bites off a little more than even she can chew with the characters she encounters (and no, I’m talking about her family).

Students at Manhattan’s YCT have initiated a boycott of Agriprocessors AKA Rubashkins. Already gone from the shelves of the Trader Joes in our Long Beach hood, Rubashkin’s and David’s are no longer being served at this Rabbi’s home. JTA reports:

A Modern Orthodox social justice group launched a boycott of the kosher slaughterhouse Agriprocessors.

Uri L’tzedek, an initiative started by students at the liberal Orthodox rabbinical seminary Yeshivat Chovevei Torah in New York City, set Monday as the date it would stop patronizing Agriprocessors if the company did not agree to abide by certain ethical labor standards.

Organizers say some 1,300 people, including several leading Jewish figures, have signed the group’s petition asking the company to establish a transparent department to ensure compliance with both Jewish and U.S. legal requirements regarding worker treatment.

Representatives of Uri L’tzedek met last week with several company officials in New York, including members of the extended Rubashkin family, which owns the company. The group was promised a statement of the company’s position on worker rights within 48 hours, but the document had not materialized as of Tuesday morning.

According to Uri L’tzedek’s own website, they are not reporting the start of the boycott yet.

EV, writer and producer of satirical comic strips, produced another one designed to enliven the senses and expand the mind. Or piss you off. Or amuse you. It may well offend you so don’t look at it if you are sensitive. You can decide by taking a read (click on the pic):

Every moment of the latest Indiana Jones film or the lasting-ness Israeli-Hamas peace treaty, brokered by Egypt?

The really telling quote comes from Hamas official Ahmed Yousef:

I am confident that everybody will abide by what we’ve agreed. All the groups which went to Cairo gave their okay to the ceasefire. If anybody does anything, they will be doing it on their own.

His confidence probably fails to inspire much confidence, as does the traceability of ‘anything’ to solo vs. affiliated activity.

Nonetheless, Muffti hopes for the best. The ceasefire takes place 6 a.m. Thursday, presumably so each side could get a few more shots in before it takes effect. The cynical amongst you may want to put together a pool, picking days that treaty will last without violation.

Originally posted on Amaldo.com.

Season 4 of Weeds premiered last night and I, for one, couldn’t have been more giddy. As a huge fan of the show, its premise, and in spite of my repressed jealousy for the fair Mary Louise Parker, the show’s start did nothing to sway my belief that this show represents one of the finest half-hour slots in entertainment on TV right now.

Last season ended with Nancy (Mary Louise Parker) torching her house and the entire Agrestic going up in flames. The police go into the basement of Celia’s (Elizabeth Perkin) house and discover Nancy’s booming pot operation and of course come to Celia looking for answers. Without disclosing too much here and potentially spoiling the experience for viewers, Albert Brooks joins the cast as Nancy’s father-in-law and the stereotypical Jewish father who regrets that his son married a goyishe woman. Brooks also doesn’t think much of Nancy’s eldest son, the one with the “goyishe punim” nor the fact that Nancy is eating the German dish, spatzle, and that she smells like gas. References to the Holocaust abound and you start to understand that the Jewish humor jokes are only going to increase exponentially with Brooks’ presence on the show.

The big open-ended question series’ creator Jenji Kohan had us all wondering last night is what’s going to happen with the storyline involving the show’s incredibly talented and witty supporting ensemble (Kevin Nealon, Elizabeth Perkins, etc) who get left behind in Agrestic now that Nancy, her kids, and her brother-in-law have shacked up with Albert Brooks just north of the border. Kohan leaked to E! that a spin-off show might be in the works that would center around the the rest of the cast. Unfortunately for Nancy-Conrad fans, Kohan sees the split has something irrevocable:

“I love those characters; I just think those relationships wore themselves out, and I wanted to be true to where the characters were. Truthfully, Heylia and Nancy had nothing more to say to each other. Conrad and Nancy weren’t going to be the loves of each other’s lives, so it was time to move on.”

On the flipside, a spin-off might be a welcome relief as it will translate to a whole hour of Weeds entertainment back-to-back and that the Call Girl show will have move to another night. Nothing against the show or anything (’twas better than expected and I’ll admit it has more potential than Sex in the City as it lives up to its sexed-up hype and shows actual sex taking place in the city), but as David Hinckley of the NY Daily News said, “Secret Diary of a Call Girl is sexy enough, but ’tis a pity she’s a bore.”

For a sneak peak of Episode 2 of Weeds click here.