Comments on: Reform Jews Suck? http://www.jewlicious.com/2009/08/reform-jews-suck/ It's a Jewish Blog! Thu, 09 Feb 2012 20:17:46 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: Adolf Hitler http://www.jewlicious.com/2009/08/reform-jews-suck/#comment-1344361 Adolf Hitler Fri, 21 Aug 2009 17:08:17 +0000 http://www.jewlicious.com/?p=9828#comment-1344361 My heils from Valhalla to you, Erwin Rommel! Fick Juden! Tod zu Judentum! My heils from Valhalla to you, Erwin Rommel! Fick Juden! Tod zu Judentum!

]]> By: Erwin Rommel http://www.jewlicious.com/2009/08/reform-jews-suck/#comment-1344218 Erwin Rommel Fri, 21 Aug 2009 02:20:00 +0000 http://www.jewlicious.com/?p=9828#comment-1344218 F*ck jews I hate them...they all should burn F*ck jews I hate them…they all should burn

]]> By: The Day In Israel: Tue Aug 11th, 2009 : Israellycool http://www.jewlicious.com/2009/08/reform-jews-suck/#comment-1340671 The Day In Israel: Tue Aug 11th, 2009 : Israellycool Tue, 11 Aug 2009 15:22:00 +0000 http://www.jewlicious.com/?p=9828#comment-1340671 [...] not for that. A 13-year-old from New York has decided to give $40,000 he received from his parents for his bar [...] [...] not for that. A 13-year-old from New York has decided to give $40,000 he received from his parents for his bar [...]

]]> By: themicah http://www.jewlicious.com/2009/08/reform-jews-suck/#comment-1340650 themicah Tue, 11 Aug 2009 14:28:27 +0000 http://www.jewlicious.com/?p=9828#comment-1340650 Yes, kids today are far more sexually aware than kids were even 10 years ago. And there might even be some oral sex happening at a b'nai mitzvah party here and there. But the only thing really widespread about this practice is how many people have heard of it. Like most urban legends, there are a handful of folks in this discussion who claim to have firsthand knowledge of it being true, but I challenge all of you to speak directly with even one kid who supposedly did this, and I'll bet you'll have a hard time finding one. Or prove me wrong. Yes, kids today are far more sexually aware than kids were even 10 years ago. And there might even be some oral sex happening at a b’nai mitzvah party here and there. But the only thing really widespread about this practice is how many people have heard of it. Like most urban legends, there are a handful of folks in this discussion who claim to have firsthand knowledge of it being true, but I challenge all of you to speak directly with even one kid who supposedly did this, and I’ll bet you’ll have a hard time finding one. Or prove me wrong.

]]> By: Grand Muffti http://www.jewlicious.com/2009/08/reform-jews-suck/#comment-1340642 Grand Muffti Tue, 11 Aug 2009 13:58:11 +0000 http://www.jewlicious.com/?p=9828#comment-1340642 hahha...nice one Sarke. CK, you know well that braces don't make a difference - they are on the front of the teeth generally and if a girl is mashing the front of her teeth into you, well, Muffti thinks that probably instantly qualifies it as non-blowjob but something else entirely...As for the realism involved in such things, Muffti doesn't find it unrealistic that a blowjob at the age of barmitzvah would last say about -3 seconds - not so unrealistic. hahha…nice one Sarke. CK, you know well that braces don’t make a difference – they are on the front of the teeth generally and if a girl is mashing the front of her teeth into you, well, Muffti thinks that probably instantly qualifies it as non-blowjob but something else entirely…As for the realism involved in such things, Muffti doesn’t find it unrealistic that a blowjob at the age of barmitzvah would last say about -3 seconds – not so unrealistic.

]]> By: sarke http://www.jewlicious.com/2009/08/reform-jews-suck/#comment-1340542 sarke Tue, 11 Aug 2009 07:41:46 +0000 http://www.jewlicious.com/?p=9828#comment-1340542 ...And I heard that Monica Lewinsky was opening up a seminary in Jerusalem. …And I heard that Monica Lewinsky was opening up a seminary in Jerusalem.

]]> By: Mordechai Luchins http://www.jewlicious.com/2009/08/reform-jews-suck/#comment-1340482 Mordechai Luchins Tue, 11 Aug 2009 02:08:45 +0000 http://www.jewlicious.com/?p=9828#comment-1340482 This sounds as legit as the idea of the hole in the sheet. C'mon. This sounds as legit as the idea of the hole in the sheet. C’mon.

]]> By: Modern Girl http://www.jewlicious.com/2009/08/reform-jews-suck/#comment-1340474 Modern Girl Tue, 11 Aug 2009 01:06:02 +0000 http://www.jewlicious.com/?p=9828#comment-1340474 In my area of research, we found that rainbow parties are greatly exaggerated, like Froylein has said. They seem like they are everywhere, because the media won't let the story die. Much like the story of "sexting" (using cell phones to set erotic messages or pictures). No body freak out and worry about your children getting syphillis at their Bar/Bat Mitzvahs. Most kids aren't doing it, and you can prevent your kids from doing it if you talk to them. Tom Morrissey, what do you have against Unitarians? In my area of research, we found that rainbow parties are greatly exaggerated, like Froylein has said. They seem like they are everywhere, because the media won’t let the story die. Much like the story of “sexting” (using cell phones to set erotic messages or pictures).

No body freak out and worry about your children getting syphillis at their Bar/Bat Mitzvahs. Most kids aren’t doing it, and you can prevent your kids from doing it if you talk to them.

Tom Morrissey, what do you have against Unitarians?

]]> By: Charlie H. Ettinson http://www.jewlicious.com/2009/08/reform-jews-suck/#comment-1340455 Charlie H. Ettinson Mon, 10 Aug 2009 23:33:03 +0000 http://www.jewlicious.com/?p=9828#comment-1340455 Oh! To be young again! No, really, this is pretty upsetting. I wonder how much of this is a Jewish Bar-Mitzvah related thing and how much it's a function of what's going on amongst 13 year olds across the board. Oh! To be young again!

No, really, this is pretty upsetting. I wonder how much of this is a Jewish Bar-Mitzvah related thing and how much it’s a function of what’s going on amongst 13 year olds across the board.

]]> By: rozi http://www.jewlicious.com/2009/08/reform-jews-suck/#comment-1340445 rozi Mon, 10 Aug 2009 22:50:00 +0000 http://www.jewlicious.com/?p=9828#comment-1340445 i heard a girl i knew gave someone a BJ at her own bat mitzvah a few years back in middle school, but all the other JAPs denounced her as a ho. this leads me to believe they didn't partake in such oral activities at their own coming of age ceremonies... i heard a girl i knew gave someone a BJ at her own bat mitzvah a few years back in middle school, but all the other JAPs denounced her as a ho. this leads me to believe they didn’t partake in such oral activities at their own coming of age ceremonies…

]]> By: Tom Morrissey http://www.jewlicious.com/2009/08/reform-jews-suck/#comment-1340414 Tom Morrissey Mon, 10 Aug 2009 20:26:03 +0000 http://www.jewlicious.com/?p=9828#comment-1340414 You expect this kind of thing from Reform Jews, Unitarians, and their ilk. You expect this kind of thing from Reform Jews, Unitarians, and their ilk.

]]> By: mike darnell http://www.jewlicious.com/2009/08/reform-jews-suck/#comment-1340404 mike darnell Mon, 10 Aug 2009 19:59:15 +0000 http://www.jewlicious.com/?p=9828#comment-1340404 Just thought about this: The head-giving Bat Mitzvahs of today are the Hadassah ladies of tomorrow, and so the great wheel of time turns... Just thought about this:

The head-giving Bat Mitzvahs of today are the Hadassah ladies of tomorrow, and so the great wheel of time turns…

]]> By: ck http://www.jewlicious.com/2009/08/reform-jews-suck/#comment-1340376 ck Mon, 10 Aug 2009 18:25:39 +0000 http://www.jewlicious.com/?p=9828#comment-1340376 I've heard that blowjobs require a certain level of finesse and sensitivity. Where's a 12-13 year old girl... Oh jeez. This is too gross to even contemplate. And then there's braces to consider too. They should hold off until they are at least 15. And if you're Haredi, 16 when you're married. I’ve heard that blowjobs require a certain level of finesse and sensitivity. Where’s a 12-13 year old girl…

Oh jeez. This is too gross to even contemplate. And then there’s braces to consider too. They should hold off until they are at least 15. And if you’re Haredi, 16 when you’re married.

]]> By: froylein http://www.jewlicious.com/2009/08/reform-jews-suck/#comment-1340374 froylein Mon, 10 Aug 2009 18:20:16 +0000 http://www.jewlicious.com/?p=9828#comment-1340374 I think it happens a lot less than is pretended. And that's because I know how to give a bj. I think it happens a lot less than is pretended. And that’s because I know how to give a bj.

]]> By: The Yeshiva Insider http://www.jewlicious.com/2009/08/reform-jews-suck/#comment-1340357 The Yeshiva Insider Mon, 10 Aug 2009 16:28:18 +0000 http://www.jewlicious.com/?p=9828#comment-1340357 This happens a lot more often than all you naysayers would care to believe. I'm just surprised it had to be the Hadassah ladies picking it up before anyone else. This happens a lot more often than all you naysayers would care to believe. I’m just surprised it had to be the Hadassah ladies picking it up before anyone else.

]]> By: Bar Mitzvah Blowjobs | Frum Satire | Jewish Comedy http://www.jewlicious.com/2009/08/reform-jews-suck/#comment-1340350 Bar Mitzvah Blowjobs | Frum Satire | Jewish Comedy Mon, 10 Aug 2009 15:38:17 +0000 http://www.jewlicious.com/?p=9828#comment-1340350 [...] Jewlicious has a piece today about the reform movement and their acknowledgment that wealthy suburban girls are giving boys blowjobs as bar miztvah presents because they already have everything else. If only I could have traded the 4 copies of Great Jews in Sports and the three sets of mishna bruras I got as gifts for blowjobs I would have been the happiest boy in the world. [...] [...] Jewlicious has a piece today about the reform movement and their acknowledgment that wealthy suburban girls are giving boys blowjobs as bar miztvah presents because they already have everything else. If only I could have traded the 4 copies of Great Jews in Sports and the three sets of mishna bruras I got as gifts for blowjobs I would have been the happiest boy in the world. [...]

]]> By: Heshy Fried http://www.jewlicious.com/2009/08/reform-jews-suck/#comment-1340339 Heshy Fried Mon, 10 Aug 2009 14:21:18 +0000 http://www.jewlicious.com/?p=9828#comment-1340339 Its all those energy drinks that kids drink, makes them grow up faster. What I wouldn't do to be transported back in time and trade in all of the copies of Great Jews in Sports for a couple of blowjobs. Maybe the rabbis will start giving blowjob classes to bat miztvah girls? Its all those energy drinks that kids drink, makes them grow up faster.

What I wouldn’t do to be transported back in time and trade in all of the copies of Great Jews in Sports for a couple of blowjobs.

Maybe the rabbis will start giving blowjob classes to bat miztvah girls?

]]> By: froylein http://www.jewlicious.com/2009/08/reform-jews-suck/#comment-1340302 froylein Mon, 10 Aug 2009 10:42:32 +0000 http://www.jewlicious.com/?p=9828#comment-1340302 To give some critical background on the Rainbow Party Wes mentioned: an enlightening article on <a href="http://www.reason.com/news/show/36643.html" rel="nofollow">ReasonOnline</a>. More bluntly put than in the article, it appears prude-to-the-ears respectively hostile-towards-[male]sexuality feminists are behind this craze. And here I was hoping the branch of castrative feminism had died out... So we get another urban legend passed around as journalism, added some particular cultural flavour to give it credibility. To give some critical background on the Rainbow Party Wes mentioned: an enlightening article on ReasonOnline.

More bluntly put than in the article, it appears prude-to-the-ears respectively hostile-towards-[male]sexuality feminists are behind this craze. And here I was hoping the branch of castrative feminism had died out… So we get another urban legend passed around as journalism, added some particular cultural flavour to give it credibility.

]]> By: Wes http://www.jewlicious.com/2009/08/reform-jews-suck/#comment-1340284 Wes Mon, 10 Aug 2009 09:18:11 +0000 http://www.jewlicious.com/?p=9828#comment-1340284 This seems to definitely fall into the category of Oprah's RAINBOW PARTY SCARE. Has it happened? Probably. Is it happening to a bunch of big-nosed, brace-faced, pimply bar mitzvah boys on a near-regular basis? Absolutely not. How do I know? Because it would be completely unfair, on a Jobian scale, for this to SUDDENLY start happening 8 years after my Bar Mitzvah. On a related note, I just invented the word Jobian, which means of or relating to Job. And these organizations that are sure to go up in arms about this - Hadassah, BBYO, NFTY, any youth movement really - are so hypocritical. They push and push Jewish "social" gatherings and then feign shock when it results in sex. The Jewish community is lucky that we don't have the Pope dictating prevention methods or else we'd have a lot more pregnant teens in the community. And here, let me feign shock at the JPost to pinning this on the Reform community. This seems to definitely fall into the category of Oprah’s RAINBOW PARTY SCARE. Has it happened? Probably. Is it happening to a bunch of big-nosed, brace-faced, pimply bar mitzvah boys on a near-regular basis? Absolutely not. How do I know? Because it would be completely unfair, on a Jobian scale, for this to SUDDENLY start happening 8 years after my Bar Mitzvah.

On a related note, I just invented the word Jobian, which means of or relating to Job.

And these organizations that are sure to go up in arms about this – Hadassah, BBYO, NFTY, any youth movement really – are so hypocritical. They push and push Jewish “social” gatherings and then feign shock when it results in sex. The Jewish community is lucky that we don’t have the Pope dictating prevention methods or else we’d have a lot more pregnant teens in the community. And here, let me feign shock at the JPost to pinning this on the Reform community.

]]> By: mike darnell http://www.jewlicious.com/2009/08/reform-jews-suck/#comment-1340274 mike darnell Mon, 10 Aug 2009 08:45:56 +0000 http://www.jewlicious.com/?p=9828#comment-1340274 So I guess anal fisting is now an acceptable wedding present? Call me old fashioned but I guess I still prefer a check. So I guess anal fisting is now an acceptable wedding present?

Call me old fashioned but I guess I still prefer a check.

]]>