}

I was promised a war-torn desert country

Does this look like a desert to you?

For this I moved to the Middle East?

It’s snowing in Jerusalem, and I, a former native of the American Mid-west, am pissed off. Winter in a wet, cold Jerusalem, where they continue to build houses without proper insulation is no treat to begin with. Especially when you realize that umbrellas in the rain are no use anyway, as the wind just contorts them into skeletons of their former selves. But snow? This is what I left Chicago because of! Well, that and something about the Zionist dream which I don’t remember exactly.

Israelis, unjaded by living half their years in a dead, barren landscape of endless grey, love the snow and get all excited about it. Giddy, even.

I attempted to go take some photos of Jerusalem of White and Jerusalemites playing in the demon-powder, but much to my chagrin, my patio is as far as I could get. You see, the weight of the snow has pulled the leaves and branches, which you see above, into a position where they completely block my staircase up to the rest of the world.

Hopefully the problem will remedy itself overnight, otherwise I might have to call on some volunteers to throw me down some supplies.

Until then, I’m just gonna close the shades and pretend like this is not happening. I hate snow almost as much as I hate babies, and I’m somewhat convinced that simply ignoring either helps them go away.

8 Comments

  1. Yoni

    12/27/2006 at 5:35 pm

    well, I guess I have to agree with you on this one. I left Toronto to come back here, and I so not miss the snow … but I do miss central heating 🙂

  2. Jon C.

    12/27/2006 at 6:58 pm

    Oh you guys love the snow, you know it. How bad could snow in Jerusalem be? its not like its gonna stick around until mid march like it does in the midwest.

  3. ramon marcos

    12/27/2006 at 9:05 pm

    Laya, if you don’t like snow you should move back to the American midwest…

    startribune.co...

    As Jon C can testify (lost your email, please repost it) the shovels are unused. Jon, I pity you having to make those West to East Bank-over the Wash. Ave. Bridge treks in 30 below windchill – except you haven’t had to yet. And Al Gore, stop your sniggering…

  4. Jon C.

    12/28/2006 at 7:04 am

    ramon,

    yoni.ra@gmail.com….

    i left town last week, did we end up getting any snow? the drive back to SD(on thurs night) was a fierce battle between me and the iced up highways, but i had the da vinci code on audiobook so it wasn’t that bad…. i was watching the local news here, there has been more snow in lubbock texas than here, fucking global warming man…..

  5. G-D SQUAD

    12/28/2006 at 7:15 am

    Being from socal, I was also very excited about the snow. Giddy, even. Not to mention the fact that we needed water here, badly. Snow of blessing, you know?

  6. Shy Guy

    12/28/2006 at 8:46 am

    My idea of blessed snow is when it comes down a meter deep.

    My wife’s idea of blessed snow is when the kids go to school the next morning.

    Nothing left. My wife is blessed.

  7. ramon marcos

    12/28/2006 at 12:27 pm

    Jon C. – not a flake. Some rain though. I saw two crocodiles eating a squirrel. Our dying Dutch Elm has been reborn as a palm and this guy came around asking for donations…

    travel.mongaba...

    We’re the new Riviera Jon.

  8. Joachim von Tripp zu Trapp

    12/28/2006 at 12:55 pm

    Trouble because of a few branches and some disturbing leaves?
    There are more than enough trees in the world,
    drill a tiny hole in the trunk and pour in some Roundup and all the future problems are solved.
    One has to think constructive.

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