The sadness we all felt at the news that Rabbi Yonah had not won the Jewish Community Heroes contest was significantly mitigated today with news that our Hero had been selected as a member of this year’s Forward 50 (!!). The exclamation points are there because I had no clue this was even a possibility. I had to find out about it after receiving a cryptic IM from Dan Brown of e-Jewish Philanthropy who then pointed me to his post on the subject.

In the decade and a half since, the dramatic shift in Jewish leadership mirrors larger trends in our society. Just as we no longer go one place for our news, we no longer look to only one powerful person in a position of authority for leadership. This year, in particular, we’ve seen some of the most established organizations questioned from the outside and challenged from within, while those who are creating and innovating seem to have history’s wind at their backs.

Neat-o.

I was going to call this piece “Abbas Plays Poker” but then Khaled Abu Toameh wrote a piece in the J Post called Abbas’s Big Bluff in which he argues that Abbas has called for Palestinian elections now with the knowledge that Hamas won’t participate. Khaled doesn’t quite make the point that this is a way for Abbas to stay in power, but that’s exactly what it is.

That touches on the big bluff. The bluff is not the one directed at Hamas, but the one directed at the international community and especially the Obama administration. For years and years American foreign policy has been built around the premise that there is a Palestinian partner for peace. After Arafat died and Abbas became the new leader of the Palestinians, the word came out from American diplomatic circles and parroted by the media, that Mahmoud Abbas was a moderate and sympathetic to the West.

Well, Abbas has now told the world that he is planning to quit. He is so darned frustrated with the non-progress of the peace talks, and especially with the Americans’ inability to “freeze” all Israeli building activity not only in the West Bank/Judea and Samaria, but also in east Jerusalem. He’s had enough of this and now he’s going to leave. Unspoken in the threat is that there isn’t anybody else who is “moderate” and of a leadership capacity to replace him. Salam Fayyad, for example, the current PM of the Palestinians is considered capable, but a technocrat who is not particularly beloved among the Palestinians. Others like the young guard, Dahlan and Barghouti are either not ripe yet or in prison. Abbas is the only known quantity and since the conventional wisdom places him as a moderate, losing him would spell the end of the known and entry into the unknown. Chaos is sure to follow, is the assumption among many diplomats in the West.

Let’s call this Bluff #1.

At the same time this news is coming from the Palestinian leader, there is now a news-leak published today in Ha’aretz, that Salam Fayyad’s decision to create the infrastructure of a state may have actually received such a warm reception in the West, that not only EU countries are receptive to taking the next step and actually permitting the declaration of a Palestinian state but even the Obama administration has secretly consented to support the creation of such a state.

The plan specifies that at the end of a designated period for bolstering national institutions the PA, in conjunction with the Arab League, would file a “claim of sovereignty” to the UN Security Council and General Assembly over the borders of June 4, 1967 (before the outbreak of the Six-Day War, during which Israel took control of the West Bank and Gaza).

Fayyad is also seeking a new Security Council resolution to replace Resolutions 242 and 338 in the hope of winning the international community’s support for the borders of a Palestinian state and applying stronger pressure on Israel to withdraw from the West Bank.

Let’s call this Bluff #2.

A good set of bluffs deserves a third bluff that isn’t of the same order, but helps to define the critical importance of the key bluffs it is supporting. Let’s call it Bluff #3:

Following Palestinian President Mahmoud Abbas’ announcement that he would not run for another term, a senior Fatah official told Ynet that if serious progress was not made soon in peace talks, the organization would consider reverting to popular warfare.

The source said Saturday that more and more Fatah operatives were calling for a return to violent resistance.

“We are not talking about terror attacks and weapons, but we are talking about protests and (throwing) stones, like the anti-fence protests, and about strikes and protests by the people, so that the world understands that the next step will be unpleasant and we go back to the way things were before Oslo.”

Wanna bet that senior official is Saeb Erakat?

UPDATE: The day after this post was written, it was reported that Abbas was threatening to dissolve the Palestinian Authority and declare the peace process dead. Bluff #3a, anybody?

Okay, back to my first post about the Palestinian endgame – wherein I propose that in this upcoming period which is supposed to last several years has the Palestinians entering a new stage in their war against Israel, one where they continue to delay a peace deal until they end up with a world that supports a single state solution. In the discussion that followed, I was asked why Fayyad would propose a state if I was right. My response was that it’s a win-win threat to make. It scares the Israelis and may get them to make additional concessions to avoid this outcome, and if it doesn’t scare the Israelis and somehow a Palestinian state comes into being, the manner of its coming into being will ensure that they can proceed to demand the rest of Israel. The process of seeking to make Israel into part of Palestine continues in one way or another.

Well, here we are and things are moving apace, certainly faster than I predicted. Let’s review:

**Across the world, Palestinian groups are teaming up with scholars, unions and other leftists to push hard on an academic, cultural and economic boycott movement. They are garnering minor successes, some failures as well but mostly a ton of publicity much of which depicts Israel in hideous terms.

**The same groups have come to use the language of apartheid to attack Israel.

**These groups are parading Jewish sympathizers as the face of their movements.

**The Sixth Fatah Congress voted not to come to peace with Israel unless all of Jerusalem is Palestinian. In the same Congress they voted to keep refugee camps open for propaganda purposes, they voted to incorporate into Fatah one of the most violent groups in the West Bank/Judea and Samaria and they voted to continue to push against Israel internationally using the apartheid model. They also informed the world through statements by people like Dahlan that contrary to previous Palestinian claims, the Fatah charter had never been changed to remove the paragraphs calling for elimination of Israel and denying the Jewish connection to Israel.

**Throughout the years during which Arafat and then Abbas ruled over the Palestinian Authority, the hysterical Israel bashing in the schools and Palestinian media has continued unabated.

**There has been no positive response to any Israeli actions towards the Palestinians. For example, about 25% of checkpoints have been removed, an entire PA army has been subsidized and armed and Israel protected the PA government from Hamas in Judea and Samaria/West Bank. The rhetoric against Israel remained aggressive and negative.

**Last year, Mahmoud Abbas said “no” to an offer of peace and a state by Israel that included the Taba Plan based on the Clinton Parameters and additionally addressed the complex problem of coming to a settlement on Jerusalem by offering to internationalize it.

**Abbas came up with a new demand once Netanyahu came into power: no negotiations until total settlement freeze. A few months earlier he rejected a generous offer by Olmert. An aide to Abbas told the Washington Post that the delay was intended to bring down Netanyahu’s government within two years. The apparent basis for this thinking is that Obama will not stand for an Israeli government that isn’t offering peace.

**Abbas has now announced that he is tired of the games and since Israel won’t play along with him, he is not running in the Palestinian election he called for January.

**A warning trial balloon is floating higher and higher now with the claim that the Palestinians will not only declare a state, but will get the UN Security Council to vote for acceptance on such a state that includes all of east Jerusalem, 1949 armistice lines and superseding UNSC resolutions 242 and 338 which effectively means that all of the West Bank/Judea and Samaria up to the Green Line becomes the new Palestine.

Whew.

Well, the bluffs here are as follows: #3, returning to low ebb civilian violence against Israel; #2 declaring a Palestinian state; #1 Abbas going away.

#3 may happen, but is unlikely to happen because the Palestinian economy is doing well right now and people are tired of the fight. They’ll get some good demonstrations in there, but a full-blown society-wide civil insurrection seems highly unlikely. The Palestinians also need to be careful not to start using suicide bombings again because it worked against them last time.

#2 may happen, but everybody must know that there is absolutely no way that Israel would ever again leave the Western Wall or the Temple Mount. Since the trial balloon floated here provides the Palestinians with everything the Jordanians and Egyptians held in 1949, including the Temple Mount and the Jewish Quarter in Jerusalem, there is no way Israel would ever permit this to happen. In other words, the world would be signing off on an interminable war. I doubt that any serious thinking western diplomat would ever let their governments go that route.

#1 Abbas wants sympathy and to achieve this he is striving to look like the underdog while underscoring how important he is to the peace process. He wants to be courted back to the dance by the powers out there because it gives him further leverage in any future peace discussions. It’s called playing hard to get.

It is plain to see that the Abbas/Fayyad duo are a pair of shrewd operators. Despite the heartwarming calls of “moderates” by European and American diplomats, however, the entire panoply of Palestinian activities over the past several years points to a different type of campaign against Israel. This time they are using supposed moderate stances in public while ensuring that their anti-Israel activities abroad and with their own population become more robust.

What is most worrisome is that they appear to be following the “stages” plan in which the idea is to move forward against Israel in stages, as circumstances permit, using every new stage as the starting point of a new cycle of doing whatever needs to be done to get to the next stage. The ultimate goal has not changed and that’s the destruction of Israel as a Jewish state in favor of an Arab-led Palestinian state.

So I say, let Abbas go. Drop him like a hot potato. So much for bluff #1.

Tell Fayyad that Jerusalem will have to be negotiated in good faith because even if a unilateral declaration of Palestinian statehood takes place, or especially if one takes place, then there won’t be any chance of a settlement, just a war. So much for bluff #2.

Low-ebb intifadahs are not an existential threat to Israel. Violence will rebound against the Palestinians. So much for bluff #3.

Finally, tell Israelis not to panic. Ignore the bluffing. Get Iron Dome and other anti-missile systems into place; continue to build the neighborhoods ringing Jerusalem but keep the upper hand by stopping contruction in Judea and Samaria/West Bank anywhere outside of the 3% envelope near the Green Line offered by Barak at Taba; put on a diplomatic counter-offensive informing the western powers that the red line is the Jewish part of east Jerusalem – a red line that leads to inevitable war.

Then, offer the Taba plan to the Palestinians again. Do it publicly and loudly.

Repeat this loud offer of peace and a Palestinian state every time somebody complains there isn’t peace. Because there could be peace tomorrow…if the Palestinians would stop believing and being led to believe by naive American administrations and pro-Arab European diplomats that their endgame will lead to either 1949 armistice lines with the right to pursue the rest of Israel, or a single state from the river to the sea.

UPDATE: Two days following this post, it was publicized that Abbas was angry at Fayyad for proposing a two state solution to world leaders as the Ha’aretz article reported. Fayyad’s office sent a denial to the media, claiming that no secret arrangements had been made with world leaders about a two state solution. Bluff? Truth? Delaying tactic?

Follow up: More About the Palestinian Endgame, where I include evidence about Palestinian intentions from Fayyad’s own two year plan…

Hmmm. An Open Letter?

The Anti-Hate Declaration: An Open Letter to the Toronto Palestine Film Festival
September 25, 2009

Let me state for the record that I am merely expressing my opinions and I do not advocate a boycott against TPFF. This is merely a protest letter.

I have been inspired by the letters of protest and boycott against the 2009 Toronto International Film Festival and have come to realize that as a member of the international internet, film, culture and media arts communities, I am deeply disturbed by the Toronto Palestine Film Festival’s decision to host a celebratory film festival in 2009 with an emphasis on certain types of Palestinian films. I protest that TPFF, whether intentionally or not, has become complicit in the Palestinian propaganda machine.

In 2009, Hamas, the ruling party in Gaza, was accused by the UNHRC’s Goldstone Report of alleged war crimes and crimes against humanity. In response, a Hamas minister announced to the press that the Palestinians were using “primitive rockets” and were actually aiming at army bases. This disingenuous response after the launching of 8000 rockets at Israeli civilian centers, including towns as far as Ashdod and Beersheva is clearly unsatisfactory and serves as no defense.

Not to be outdone, Fatah, the main party behind the Palestinian National Authority headed by Salim Fayyad and Mahmoud Abbas, held their Sixth Congress, in which they voted to maintain the right to “armed struggle:”

“The Fatah movement clings to the Palestinian people’s right to resist the occupation by all legitimate means, including the right to implement the armed struggle”

and especially to implementing:

“activities for escalating the international campaign for boycotting Israel, its products, and its institutions, utilizing the experience of South Africa.”

Fatah also voted to confront Israel if negotiations failed by

“the development of the struggle against apartheid and Israeli racism.”

Conveniently, the Palestinians are refusing to hold negotiations with Israel, as per the statements of a senior Palestinian official who divulged that Abbas plans to freeze talks with Israel because the Palestinian leadership believes this will cause a crisis with the US and bring down Netanyahu’s government within 2 years.

Perhaps even more disturbing than this intended campaign to equate Israel with South African apartheid as part of a strategic propaganda push at a time when both sides should be negotiating for peace, is Fatah’s vote to keep Palestinian refugee camps open. These are camps that have been around for 62 years and have seen 3 generations of people living in destitution and to a large extent on UN funds and donations. Importantly, this is also the only group of refugees on the planet whose refugee status extends beyond the first generation as per the UN’s own UN High Commission for Refugees. As the vote shows, these camps could be shut down, but they are not going to be and Fatah explained why: propaganda.

“Fatah considers it essential to preserve the refugee camps until the [refugee] problem is resolved, so that they will serve as fundamental political evidence…”

Using “refugee camps” and claims of “apartheid,” it is evident that Fatah and its political child, the Palestinian Authority, intend to pursue an international strategy of using propaganda modeled after the struggle against South African apartheid to attack Israel and promote the Palestinian cause. This will certainly deflect valid criticism of the Palestinian refusal to accept Israel’s offers of peace in 2000, 2001 and 2008 and continued reluctance to negotiate. Instead the idea seems to be to refocus the media and public opinion on “refugee camps” and “apartheid”- even if the refugees could move elsewhere and Israel has no apartheid.

Infuriatingly, this propaganda plan could well be a mere stop-gap in a larger endeavor to destroy Israel as Fatah spokesman Fahmi Al-Za’arir stated recently:

“It is not possible to rule out or to marginalize the military option…We know that every warrior has a [period of] rest – and also we know that this does not mean the end of the national battle, but only a wait to obtain the goals, and to give the leadership sufficient opportunity for political activity.”

Fatah violence against Israel was endemic after Israel’s peace offer of 2000 and aborted peace offer of 2001. Some reports at the time indicated that Fatah was responsible for more attacks against Israelis than all other Palestinian groups combined.

It needs to also be noted that the recent allegations by the United Nation’s Human Rights Council’s Goldstone Report that the attacks from Gaza against Israel may constitute war crimes and crimes against humanity may also refer to Fatah since many of these attacks took place under Fatah rule of Gaza.

All of this is relevant to Toronto in September 2009 when the second Toronto Palestine Film Festival is scheduled to launch. On the Festival’s Advisory Board are Richard Fung and John Greyson who protested and boycotted (respectively) the 2009 Toronto International Film Festival. Their reasons, stated in separate letters and interviews, strangely echo Fatah’s propaganda efforts. Specifically, comparisons between South Africa and Israel are made, as is the charge of apartheid against Israel.

Also on the TPFF board are members of CAIA, the Coalition Against Israeli Apartheid, at least two of whose publicly listed members, Mazen Masri and Jenny Peto, have been involved in the protest and boycott against the 2009 TIFF and its City to City program which highlighted Tel Aviv cinema. CAIA has been active for Palestinian causes in Toronto, often with another organization called Palestine House which “conceived” the TPFF. Both appear to advocate or at least support a solution to the Arab-Israeli conflict which would likely eliminate Israel’s identity as a Jewish state.

On its website, TPFF states that it,

“welcomes audiences of all backgrounds to experience the vibrant heritage, resilience and culture of the Palestinian people, while celebrating film as an art form and means of expression.”

Yet surface claims such as this are contradicted by John Greyson, who, in his Open Letter to the TIFF, gave an entirely different explanation of the intent of a screening which he helped organize for TPFF. He wrote,

“I’m helping organize a screening in September for the Toronto Palestinian Film Festival…that profiles Ezra Nawi, the queer Israeli activist jailed for blocking army bulldozers…a strategic, specific choice, and one that has triggered many productive discussions.

What kind of conversations would those be? Are those the conversations that would make Israel into a state that has no Jewish identity? In the same letter, Greyson stated that the fight against Israel reminds him of the fight against South Africa. A filmmaker who boycotted a film festival for showing Israeli films as part of a program about an Israeli city, and who earlier boycotted a gay and lesbian film festival in Tel Aviv because of its location, makes a “strategic, specific” film selection for TPFF that depicts Israel critically. This is the same individual who writes in his letter that he is moved to act against Israel because of similarities to South Africa. Isn’t this exactly what Fatah sought in voting to “escalat[e] the international campaign for boycotting Israel…utilizing the experience of South Africa.”

TPFF’s mission statement states that the festival seeks to “celebrat[e] film as an art form and means of expression,” but this seems to be an empty statement given the absence of certain types of films. Films boycotted and protested by TPFF Advisory Board members at this year’s TIFF’s City to City program presented views critical of Israel, Israeli society and the conflict between Arabs and Israelis. However, there appear to be no films presented at TPFF that present Palestinian violence against Israel from a critical standpoint or that positively show or depict Israeli peace efforts and offers of a state to the Palestinians.

Also seemingly absent are films that seriously depict challenges faced by minorities in Palestinian society, unless the blame is placed on Israel, and despite the thousands of terrorist attacks by Gazan Palestinians against Israeli civilian communities over a period of the last 8 years, attacks that have been accused by the UNHRC’s Goldstone Report of allegedly amounting to severe human rights violations including war crimes and crimes against humanity, the films at TPFF that discuss Gaza are almost exclusively critical of Israel.

The TPFF states that it was “conceived to introduce Toronto audiences to the richness and diversity of Palestine and Palestinians” and yet this frame for its films ignores not only the suffering of thousands of Israelis who have endured thousands of rocket attacks for many years, but its 2009 program seems to also avoid films about Palestinians inside Gaza who were made to suffer severely – including torture and death – by Hamas, or films about the tragedies of many Christian and gay Palestinians who live in challenging conditions or have left to other countries because of intimidation or violence directed at their own communities by other Palestinians in both Gaza and the West Bank. There also appears to be no mention of the Jordanian decision to revoke the citizenship of their Palestinians citizens. At TPFF there is apparently only one enemy to the Palestinians: Israel.

The TPFF’s programming emphasis on films that attack Israel while minimizing or eliminating films about topics such as challenges for minorities in Palestinian society, Palestinian actions against Israeli civilians, Palestinian demonization of Israel and its supporters, and the harsh realities for some Palestinians because of Hamas rule in the Gaza strip, is like rhapsodizing about the beauty of the beaches or the superb cuisine in Cuba without acknowledging the corresponding despotic and sometimes brutal regime that governs the island.

I do not protest the individual Palestinian filmmakers included in TPFF, nor do I in any way suggest that Palestinian films should be unwelcome in Toronto. However, especially in the wake of the past 8 years of brutal assaults and alleged war crimes on Israel from Gaza and the West Bank, as well as dozens of successful suicide bombings (and many more attempted ones that failed) against Israeli civilians from Fatah-affiliated groups, as well as the intense international demonization of Israel which often blends into demonization of Israel’s supporters, particularly Jewish ones, and the ongoing efforts to ignore serious peace overtures that have been made to the Palestinians by Israel, and especially the glossing over of the difficulties facing Palestinian minorities in their own society, it would appear that the frame TPFF has created for Palestinian films knowingly or unknowingly has politicized its entire festival and is playing Fatah’s and the Palestinian Authority’s propaganda cards.

That is disturbing because it makes me think that they are forcing audience members to cross an imaginary line that hovers between authenticity and integrity on the one side and propaganda on the other. TPFF, by selecting films that reveal only a segment of Palestinian life, by putting on a face of that society that selectively exposes only part of a larger picture, and by having advisory board members who have attacked the Tel Aviv program at TIFF while promoting films for TPFF (John Greyson’s mention of the Nawi film in his first Open Letter) has made their festival into a political forum mere months after Fatah voted to keep the refugee camps open and Hamas conducted operations continuing attacks against Israeli civilians culminating in a war launched by Hamas (Operation Oil Stain) against Israel that drew an inevitable and expectedly strong Israeli response.

What comes to mind are the words of Mahmoud Dahlan who protested the death of a 5 year old Palestinian boy killed by errant Palestinian rockets aimed at Israeli civilians, “What took place…is a national scandal… We should put an end to this by any means, by force, or by pursuing and convincing.” Force or pursuit may be appropriate for a Palestinian strongman but not for people who seek peace and justice in North America. Convincing is the way to act! The TPFF must be convinced through this protest to present an even-handed depiction of Palestinian society and the violence it has used against Israel and sometimes even other Palestinians in furtherance of its own goals.

[Based on the "protest" and "boycott" letters to the Toronto International Film Festival]

For more Jewlicious.com reading about this:

The original investigative post connecting the Palestine House Media to the “protest” letter writers to the Toronto Film Festival

National Post in Canada reports about our inquiries regarding the strange phone number used for Palestine House activities

Palestine House and an Activist respond to the question of their involvement in the protest and boycott against the 2009 Toronto International Film Festival.

The Daily Lie

Exposing Naomi Klein’s Boycott Denial

Response to the “protest” letter against TIFF, 2009

Response to John Greyson’s letter to TIFF, 2009

Olmert’s offer to the Palestinians

Abbas choosing to stall on peace talks. Again.

The PA did not change its charter as per their Oslo obligations. This was recently publicly confirmed before the Fatah conference by two of Fatah’s leaders including Dahlan.

Israel’s peace offer at Taba.

Six Day War Anniversary Post

Nope. This isn’t about a free Birthright Israel trip (although registration for winter begins Sept. 8th and you can go with us – more info here), or any kind of flashy contest with cool prizes. The Ticket to Jerusalem Project is a simple concept, really. All you have to do is create any kind of artwork called “Ticket To Jerusalem”. Do it on a thick horizontal piece of paper, 8×3″ (20×8 cm), the size of conventional airplane ticket or boarding pass. Attach a stamp, add a return address and mail it WITHOUT an envelope to: Radik Shvarts, PO Box 245614, Brooklyn, NY, 11224, USA. The project deadline is January 1st, 2010 and all entries will posted online. Most of them will also be exhibited internationally and featured in a book titled “Ticket To Jerusalem” that will be published in 2010. Every person, whose artwork is featured in the book will get a free copy.

That’s it! So far the site features a pretty eclectic collection of 41 pieces of ticket art and, and… I don’t know what to say. It’s kind of sweet because there seems to be no underlying political message. No one’s trying to sell you anything, it’s just this very whimsical thing that is a pure celebration of creativity. OK so it is sponsored by the UJA Federation of New York, and COJECO (a central coordinating body in the Russian Jewish community of NY that works towards successul integration of Russian Jews into American Jewish life) but so what? Good on them for being involved in something that’s this much… fun!

Join The Pre-Trip Mailing List

Yo! It’s that time of the year again. Time to start thinking about going on a free Birthright Israel Trip next winter. If you are between 18-26, Jewish and have never been on a peer-based trip to Israel before, start thinking about floating in the Dead Sea, visiting the Kotel in Jerusalem, sipping a cappuccino in Tel Aviv and hiking and touring the width and breadth of Israel. For free. Registration is going to begin in September but you can give yourself a leg up by pre-registering at IsraelOnTheHouse.com. Don’t think about it. Just do it. It doesn’t cost anything and signing up does not obligate you in any way. Now here’s the fun part. Ready?

Select “Jewlicious” as your referrer and you will be able to go on a co-branded Jewlicious trip. What does that mean? Well, you will get all the usual good stuff mandated by Taglit-Birthright Israel, all the remarkable creative programming and planning skills of the team at IsraelOnTheHouse.com AND further enhancements introduced by the witty, knowledgeable and irreverent folks that you know and love here at Jewlicious.

How has that manifested itself in the past? Unplanned excursions to less frequented locales, special live music events by local indie acts, a variety of hip, interesting speakers, the ongoing commentary of people passionate about Israel, all kinds of awesome stuff and really, really good hummus. Seriously, it’s that good. So… yeah. Sign up now, select “Jewlicious” and by all means feel free to contact us with any questions you might have.

this trip is a gift from Taglit-Birthright Israel.

New York International Fringe Festival Comedy Sex and the Holy Land

One cannot ignore the correlation between sex and Israel that exists in the hearts and loins of the tens of thousands of parentally unsupervised diaspora youth that visit Israel every year. Many will explore the hills, valleys and bodies of water that dot the country while engaging in a similar exploration of each others bodies. Many will note the sheer sexiness of the terrain and the sun kissed people that inhabit it. A good number of diaspora women will have, uh… physical interactions with refreshingly forward Israelis, though a much smaller number of diaspora men will be so fortunate (Israeli women don’t tend to be very attracted to boyish, soft in the middle Jewish guys). Thus it is no surprise that Sex and the Holy Land, a play opening at the New York International Fringe Festival this week is focused on the adventures of Lili, a female protagonist. A similar play focusing on a guy’s adventures would read as follows: “Tried to get with soldier chick. Fail. Tried to get with girl medic. Fail. Tried to get with bartender girl. Fail. Finally got with that slut from Fresno who wanted to cheat on her boyfriend. Bitchin!” Yeah. Boring right? But from a woman’s perspective? Hotness. And funny too apparently.

From their press release:

SEX AND THE HOLY LAND is the tale of Lili’s plunge into a stereotype-shattering sexploration of Israel. Her two best friends and a string of Middle Eastern men lead Lili out of enslavement by the Greek Chorus of Jewish Mothers ruling in her mind. It is a coming of age comedy about liberation, religion, and love… Marking 23-year-old playwright Melanie Zoey Weinstein’s New York debut, SEX AND THE HOLY LAND was inspired by Weinstein’s study abroad experience in Tel Aviv in Spring 2007, following the Second Lebanon War. “It was a time of disillusionment and questioning for myself and many of my friends,” said Weinstein. “We were experiencing Israel for the first time as adults outside of the Jewish institutions in which we were raised.”

Sex and the Holy Land will be performed 5 times at the New York International Fringe Festival starting August 18. If you go see it, let us know what you think!

Say NO! to meaningless sloganeering and empty gestures!

From Amazon.com: Multinational corporations have many enemies but few as creative and funny as the Yes Men. In 1993, Mike Bonanno made news by switching the voice boxes of Barbie and G.I. Joe dolls and returning them to store shelves. In 1996, Andy Bichlbaum made a splash by programming kissing, swimsuit-clad men into 80,000 copies of an action video game. When the two met, a collaboration was born. In 1999, they created a Web site parodying that of the World Trade Organization (WTO).Though the WTO denounced the spoof site, and though its creators felt the satire was self-evident, legitimate speaking invitations began arriving by e-mail. Undaunted, the Yes Men donned thrift-store suits and went where they’d been asked, posing as WTO spokemen and making outrageously callous statements. Their audiences were unfazed, prompting the Yes Men to raise the stakes again and again.

In 2008, the Yes Men premiered The Yes Men Fix the World at Sundance, a movie which follows the two as they infiltrate the world of big business and pull off outrageous pranks that highlight the ways that corporate greed is destroying the planet. Invited to present their film at the Jerusalem Film Festival, they originally agreed and then pulled out, citing their adherence to the Boycott, Divestment and Sanctions campaign against Israel. Asked why they don’t boycott the Congo or the US, Andy Bichlbaum said that “we haven’t been invited to the Kinshasa Film Festival (and we wouldn’t have been able to afford the private security force if we had been). More importantly, changing U.S. policy (and the direct and indirect results of that policy, e.g. in the Congo) is going to take a lot more than a boycott—whereas in Israel, a boycott could actually work.” Given that the bulk of their revenue comes from the US, one can’t help note that that sure is a convenient answer.

The duo then wrote an open letter to the organizers of the Jerusalem Film Festival articulating the reasons for their decision not to present their film there. I in turn decided to write an open letter to Andy and Mike expressing why I will no longer pay to see their films or buy their books. Read it after the bump!

Dear Yes Men,
I regret to say that I have taken the hard decision to not pay to watch your film “The Yes Men Fix the World,” in solidarity with intelligent and caring people who recognize that the Boycott, Divestment and Sanctions campaign (http://www.bdsmovement.net/), in whose name you withdrew from the Jerusalem Film Festival, is a misguided and malicious effort whose aim is more to harm and libel Israel than it is to actually further peace and security for both Israelis and Palestinians.

This decision does not come easily as for years I have enjoyed and felt a strong affinity with your antics aimed at exposing greed, stupidity and corruption, in both the corporate and governmental sectors. I’ve lived in New Orleans and even returned last year for two weeks of volunteer humanitarian work. While rebuilding homes damaged by Hurricane Katrina, I couldn’t help but recall your HUD prank that highlighted the destruction of 500 undamaged public housing units in New Orleans. I too am horrified by the actions of corporations like Exxon and Dow who cause death and destruction with relative impunity.

But despite the appreciation I have for your work, I cannot abandon my common sense and decency. Your comparison of Apartheid era South Africa to Israel is simply false and totally inaccurate. Palestinian civil society has had ample opportunity to live in peace with Israel, but these opportunities have been continuously stymied by their government’s rejectionism. If peace and compliance with International norms of conduct is what you want, you’d have more success boycotting the Palestine Authority and Hamas.

It is painful to do this, but I am left with no choice when you lend credence to marginal ignoramuses in Israel and around the world who revoltingly use the term “fascist” to describe Israeli policies. In doing so you trivialize the crimes committed by actual fascists and dishonor the memories of their many, many victims. More importantly, you do nothing to advance the cause of peace. I know what I’m talking about and it’s painful to think about just how wrong you are in this case.

Of course things in Israel are less than ideal, when are they ever ideal when one lives in a perpetual state of conflict? When rockets rain on your countrymen? When the possibility of random terrorist attacks against civilians is a daily reality? When world leaders wish you and yours to be wiped off the face of the earth? When your country is singled out as the worst abuser of human rights truly while genocidal maniacs defiantly visit world capitals unhindered?

Is it Anti-Zionism or merely age old Antisemitism rearing its ugly head again less than 70 years after the fires of Auschwitz were finally put out? And what of the Jews that lend succor and support to our enemies? Is it self hatred or merely survival instinct that motivates their deeds? Whatever words are applied to such actions, our entertainment dollars mustn’t help lend an aura of normalcy to individuals that make these decisions. For me, that’s the bottom line.

There is certainly another way to do things in Israel/Palestine, and that is what we must fight for, however difficult our task. We must eschew the otherwise well intentioned simple minded sloganeering and empty gestures of the Yes Men and the self righteous fools behind the Boycott, Divestment and Sanctions campaign. We must appeal to the Palestinians to seek the way of a negotiated peace and to elevate new leaders that will unite them for a better future for them, for us and for all our children.

As for the Yes Men film, there is another way for it to be seen in Israel… and in Palestine, and anywhere else, so that the people most in need of comic relief, who would never have been able to see it at the Jerusalem Film Festival anyhow, will be able to see it too, and for free. It’s called Bit Torrent and the film is already available there, free of charge for anyone with a Bit Torrent client like uTorrent. Why reward a bad decision with your hard earned money? Folks like you have to learn that there are repercussions to their decisions. I’m not suggesting a boycott of the Yes Men, let each be guided by his or her conscience. But I’ll be damned if you see a nickel of my hard earned money. Unless you eventually reconsider and figure out more productive ways to advance peace in the Middle East.

L’shanah haba’ah beyerushalayim Andy and Mike you shmendricks!

Seriously, I'd be a great replacement for Gilad Shalit!

It’s clear that even after three years in captivity, it’s unlikely that Hamas is going to let Gilad Shalit go any time soon. Some of the reasons for this, beyond the fact that Hamas are heartless motherfuckers, were succinctly elucidated by Guy Bechor in an opinion piece in YNet titled Hamas fears a swap. Bechor outlines 10 reasons why including the fact that Shalit is the only asset currently possessed by Hamas; Hamas’ Damascus based leadership doesn’t really want to release prisoners like the domestic Hamas leaders currently in prisons as well as Fatah’s Marwan Barghoutti, both of whom will challenge their control etc. etc. The bottom line is that Hamas needs an Israeli prisoner. But does it have to be Gilad Shalit?

I suggest that they let Gilad Shalit go. Three years without even a visit from the Red Cross is enough already. Instead, they can take me. By letting Gilad rejoin his friends and family, they can show what awesome humanitarians they are and by taking me, they can retain the advantages they have secured from kidnapping an Israeli. I think I’d be a pretty good hostage too! Like Shalit I hold dual citizenship, my Mom and sisters are sure to go batshit – crying for the camera and begging for my release while my Dad can present the stoic figure of a simple man thrust into the limelight, begging Israeli and world leaders to do what they can to secure my release. Unlike Shalit I can bide my time preparing excellent Tahini and Shakshuka for my captors and if Hamas wants to get really creative, they can allow me Internet access which will enable me to blog and tweet about how awful or awesome my captors are. But that’s entirely up to them. I’m willing to go with absolutely no preconditions. I’ll even bring a few cartons of Marlboro cigarettes as a humanitarian gift to my future captors who must be getting seriously raspy throats from all those nasty Egyptian Cleopatra cigarettes they’re forced to smoke because of Israel’s blockade. I’d really be an awesome hostage. Really. My lease expires September 15th and doing the swap by then would allow Shalit to rejoin his family in time for the holidays. I don’t have much going on right now, I’m not dating anyone and it might not be a bad idea to ride out the bad economic times in a Gaza prison as a guest of Hamas.

Now it’s entirely possible that some other reader of Jewlicious would make for a better hostage. If you think you’d be a superior replacement to Gilad Shalit, let me know! Send me a photo of you holding a “Dear Hamas, Take me!” sign and let me know why you’d make a better hostage and we’ll repost it here. If you convince me that you’re tougher and more congenial than me, I may even send you a free “I Love Hashem” t-shirt which I am sure would serve you really well in Gaza… REALLY well… Send all entries to jewlicious at gmail dot com and enter “Dear Hamas Take Me!” into the subject line.

If they were not on Facebook inviting people to join their fanpage, I might never had heard of this. Well, perhaps I would have when I got to LA, which seems to be the hive of their activities.

Apparently LA is the center of some really frightenting parasitic religious groups. There is of course Madonna’s Kabob Center and there is this: The Messianic Jewish Theological Institute. With campuses in LA and Jerusalem, I might add.

I know that we have serious problems out there. Big, and Major problems. With Israel, Iran, terror, unemployment. All kinds of “mean, ugly and nasty” stuff, to quote Arlo Guthrie. So why waste a few keystrokes on these guys?

Well they are on Facebook, and I feel a moral obligation to inform and warn the general public about this parasitic group that regularly feeds on unsuspecting Jews.

Ok. Now you know. If you are Jewish, please stay far far far far away from these guys and you will be fine.

From their Rabbinical Program Desciption:

RO’I offers practical courses in congregational leadership. RO’I also provides spiritual and vocational direction for Rabbinical candidates. While SJS is a distance learning program, RO’I offers intensive, face-to-face courses given in conjunction with UMJC conferences and retreats.

MJTI is an approved school of the Union of Messianic Jewish Congregations. We offer the courses required for the UMJC Madrikh (Licensure) Certificate and S’micha (Ordination). You can learn more about the MJTI courses by reading the MJTI Program Guide.

However, MJTI does not offer the Madrikh and S’micha credentials themselves. These are offered by the UMJC. For more information about the Madrikh (Licensure) Certificate, and an application for the program, please visit the UMJC website.

This image does NOT give me a woody

Our dear froylein wrote about Woody Allen’s $10 million suit against American Apparel for using his image on billboards in Hollywood and New York without his permission. On the eve of the trial, American Apparel’s Insurance company and Allen reached a settlement for $5 million. Which is too bad really. I was curious to find out what possible commercial value could be associated with a guy who took nude pics of and later married his girlfriend’s adopted daughter. Allen and said girlfriend, Mia Farrow, had a biological son together and Ronan Seamus Farrow had this to say about Daddy’s shenanigans:

He’s my father married to my sister. That makes me his son and his brother-in-law. That is such a moral transgression. I cannot see him. I cannot have a relationship with my father and be morally consistent… I lived with all these adopted children, so they are my family. To say Soon-Yi was not my sister is an insult to all adopted children.

American Apparel’s lawyers promised to wage a scorched earth battle against Allen. Also at issue was the company’s 1st Amendment rights to make a non-commercial statement and make “fair use” of an image that would otherwise fall under copyright protection. Dov Charney, the CEO of AA stated:

For the record, I personally think we had a good case. As one of my lawyers, Adam Levin explained, “Common sense dictates that the billboard at issue here is ‘not a simple advertisement.’ As a matter of law, no commercial transaction is proposed: no merchandise is shown or described, and no price is quoted. Instead, the billboard contains an image of an Orthodox Jew in a black top hat – none of which can be purchased at American Apparel. And the writing on the poster is not the copy of a commercial advertisement, but Yiddish words identifying Allen as “The High Rabbi.” Finally, even if the billboard is found to have the dual purpose of a commercial transaction and an expressive medium, First Amendment protection still attaches because the two elements are ‘inextricably intertwined.’ The decision of the United States Court of Appeal for the Ninth Circuit in Hoffman v. Capital Cities/ABC http://www.altlaw.org/v1/cases/1610780 …makes [it] abundantly clear that the speech at issue in this case is protected by the First Amendment. Any other conclusion inevitably would chill critical social and political commentary and debate.” … The billboards were designed to inspire dialogue. They were certainly never intended to sell clothes.

American Apparel has in the past used it’s marketing clout to advocate for immigration reform and against California’s Proposition 8 which banned gay marriage in the state.

Woody Allen is a wienie, what can I say. I would have had a tiny smidgen of respect for him had he just accepted the pulling of the billboards after less than a week and an apology. But that’s not saying much really. I find it hard to have respect for anyone who done diddled where he done did. Jerk. I’m now going to make it a point to shop at the American Apparel on Rivlin street in Jerusalem in order to help offset the company’s higher insurance premiums. OK, ok. I’m also gonna buy some hot shorts for a friend who I am sure is going to look awesome in ‘em. What can I say? I’m a true humanitarian!

Props to Jessica at Israel 21c for finally noticing that Jerusalem has an American Apparel! Here’s a tip though. Next time you visit the store, leave the double stroller outside – one of the staff will be happy to watch the kids while you shop for uh… hot shorts or whatever!